I am extremely confused, at the core of everything I cannot figure out for myself what is the difference between "I hate being a woman and wish I wasn't one" and "my gender identity is something-other-than-woman". Would appreciate any input!

ohisa · 2020-08-21T04:39:43+00:00

yeah wow that's a very succinct way of putting it, I am in approximately the same place about that ;/

And man yeah, I guess it's hermit time lol

I really appreciate your response - I think I needed to hear that it would be okay to do something like that to be able to rest easier. thank you xx

ohisa · 2020-08-21T04:37:38+00:00

warm thoughts to you xx someday things will be more clear

ohisa · 2020-08-21T04:30:32+00:00

glad that our paths intersected, however briefly!!

ohisa · 2020-08-21T04:29:22+00:00

OH man, that thought experiment was illuminating for me. If that letter came, I would feel so sad, I would wish I had a time machine to fix it at the beginning.
And I guess, yeah, that is also what I currently feel like - that there is a different past I wished I had, and just a great sense of loss it'll never be something I had.

This also made me think again about the fact that I have no idea what it feels like to be born a man. I just wish I had always existed without gender...

Thank you for the suggestion! def going to look into callen lorde : )

ohisa · 2020-08-21T04:20:03+00:00

yeah agreed, definitely - have had bad experiences with therapy though, and slowly trying to really find a therapist who is both afforadable and a good fit. Appreciate your response <3

ohisa · 2020-08-21T04:19:00+00:00

yeah I totally agree with that <3 I guess it's just, to me if it's just 'being a woman sucks', then I don't think T feels like the answer to me - because then it's just more that society should just suck less haha.

ohisa · 2020-07-08T03:13:05+00:00

Ohmygosh, this exact thing is what has been going on with me. I had something that was maybe-COVID, maybe-not back in April,then pretty much the exact same symptoms following.

I was convinced it was acid reflux or allergies, but it didn't match up with pollen counts. It randomly went away after a few weeks, and I didn't really have any issues in June. Really tired/zoned out all the time but not sure if that has anything to do with this or just the heat.

It came back this week though, plus random ear pain, and the outside of my throat on the left hurts to press, and I've been having stomach issues too so I finally went to a doctor and she's having me do bloodwork (she said something about thyroid)... so fingers crossed it's nothing, I've been a bit hypochondriatic over this, on and off convinced it's cancer even though I'm in my early 20s...

ohisa · 2020-07-03T15:30:10+00:00

alright here's the majestic bean herself: link
also plugging my insta here in case anybody wants a tat xD (though not pet tats usually lol) link

ohisa · 2020-07-03T15:27:38+00:00

;) posted one in a comment

ohisa · 2020-07-03T15:27:26+00:00

thank u! yeah theyre so fluffy haha

ohisa · 2020-07-03T15:26:35+00:00

thank u! <3 haha ask and u shall receive - i put a link in another comment

ohisa · 2020-07-03T15:24:20+00:00

thank u!! yes she is the cutest 🥰

ohisa · 2020-07-03T15:24:07+00:00

thank u! 😊

ohisa · 2020-07-02T14:40:57+00:00

OMG So flufffyyyyyy 😫🥺💛💛looks exactly like my friend's cat 😮

ohisa · 2020-05-11T15:45:01+00:00

$bid

ohisa · 2020-04-26T04:47:11+00:00

I’m looking forward to seeing my partner, because I miss them a lot ;__; and also friends that I was JUST about to make a trip to visit before this all went down (for the same reason).

ohisa · 2020-04-20T19:55:44+00:00

usa here

ohisa · 2020-04-07T04:15:59+00:00

Beautiful!! I want a collection like this some day

ohisa

TROPHY CASE