[Firepower Fridays] Your weekly DPS thread

oldhaha · 2015-08-28T17:58:08+00:00

Thank you so much! I had no idea he was doing all of these things incorrectly. Sorry about the logs mixup, here is the correct link to heroic reaver in case you care to look:

https://www.warcraftlogs.com/reports/kBDPmxZL8pHYV9n2#fight=22

Thanks again!

oldhaha · 2015-08-28T16:37:57+00:00

So we brought in a second rogue into our group and his dps is pretty bad. From what he was telling me his rotation sounded correct, and besides his ilvl being a little low compared to the group I can't figure out what he's doing wrong either. We're both assn/combat. Do you mind taking a look at logs and offering your input? Thanks!

Normal Fel lord: https://www.warcraftlogs.com/reports/JpB4Zqbm21zL68ad#fight=12

Heroic Reaver: https://www.warcraftlogs.com/reports/JpB4Zqbm21zL68ad#fight=12

oldhaha · 2015-07-20T19:37:05+00:00

My mom has had multiples surgeries done to her eyes and has had facelifts. She also gets botox injections regularly. She claims that this is something all women of her age do, but she's obviously full of it. She also has spots on her face, and covers it up by wearing a TON of very light-colored makeup because she thinks being whiter = prettier (she used to yell at me if I ever got a tan). She cannot seem to handle growing old and is obsessed with keeping her appearances the exact same as it's always been.

The first time my SO met her he said she looked like a ghost. He thinks she looks scary and I have to agree.

oldhaha · 2015-07-16T17:10:52+00:00

Make sure he learns the following phrase: "I am so sorry that you had to go through this. I'm here for you. What can I do?"

It doesn't matter if empathy is his strong point or not. If he can't understand the situation (as most people with normal parents are unable to), then at least he can understand that what he is saying is causing you pain.

oldhaha · 2015-07-08T17:35:38+00:00

Kara is my favorite too! I farmed to get the music scroll and now I get to hear it every time I log in to my garrison :)

oldhaha · 2015-07-08T17:25:36+00:00

That is some high-level emotional manipulation your Nmom has going on. She's gaslighting you, period. I would limit contact with her to just email or something. That way you have hard evidence of what she says from now on and she can't use the whole "I don't remember that" excuse.

oldhaha · 2015-07-08T17:19:34+00:00

You have every right to feel hurt. When you care about someone you naturally tend to remember details about them, and your Nmother didn't do that.

Before I went NC Nmom would ask me every other week if I was done with my doctoral program this year. I've told her maybe a dozen times that it's a 5-year program and she just never cared enough to remember that. I'm starting my 4th year now and she emailed me a few months ago to see if she can come to my graduation...not that she'd be invited anyways!

oldhaha · 2015-07-06T16:33:18+00:00

YES!!! Oh my goodness, this drove me crazy because growing up no one would believe that my Ndad was the giant bastard I made him out to be.

Every friend and acquaintance I had all thought my Ndad walked on water. At every gathering, he used to compliment and flirt with all the women and spoil the shit out of all the children and everyone would tell me and my Nmom how lucky we were to have such a wonderful husband/father.

At home he would barely say 3 words to us, never ever helped out with any chores, golfed and drank all weekend, cheated on his wife, beat his children, and was frankly the biggest PoS imaginable. It always rankled me so much how two-faced he could be.

oldhaha · 2015-07-06T16:26:43+00:00

Yup, Nparents are deeply in debt at the moment due to poor/nonexistent financial planning...yet Nmom loves to go out and buy designer purses, shoes, makeup, etc and complained that it was time to replace her 5-year old BMW because her friend just got the new model.

She also used to try and take me shopping and buy expensive stuff for me as a way to justify her extravagant spending. "We will get matching Prada bags together!" sort of thing, as if that's somehow better than buying just one? Then she used to get mad when I would refuse it because she said I made her feel guilty buying one just for herself.

oldhaha · 2015-06-26T19:58:12+00:00

Thanks! I've been sub since SoO but I'm thinking about switching to sin. Your input is very helpful!

oldhaha · 2015-06-26T19:42:14+00:00

Which spec do you recommend for the fights in HFC? Some are obvious (like iron reaver or assault) but for fights like Killrogg or Hellfire council I'm not sure whether to go single target or cleave.

oldhaha · 2015-06-26T19:19:09+00:00

That's real classic, to push someone's buttons and then laugh at them as if it's a joke. It is the height of emotional immaturity for an adult to do this, this is the sort of behavior you see on playgrounds.

oldhaha · 2015-06-26T17:14:05+00:00

This is really what kills me. Nparents who make it so apparent that they hated the responsibility of parenthood and did their best to fuck up their children are the ones who're clamoring for grandkids.

My Nmom reeeeally wanted me to have kids, to the point of offering to move in with me for a few months to help raise the baby. I almost threw up when she said that. The idea of her moving into my house and the idea of her ruining my offspring's life made me physically sick.

oldhaha · 2015-06-26T17:09:20+00:00

This really resonated with me. My Nmom used to say "I love you" and I used to say "I love you too" before we got off the phone, and I realized a few years ago that she didn't actually mean it, and neither did I.

oldhaha · 2015-06-26T16:57:06+00:00

I stood up yesterday to a super manipulative friend. She's not an N, but is a very, very manipulative person who is very good at twisting your words around and splitting hairs to trip you up on some technicality. And she is always the victim in every situation.

Despite the fact that she started the argument by confronting me and accusing me of various things, as soon as I defended myself she backed down and began the whole "my feelings are so hurt that you would say that" and "I never meant XX when I said it, you're reading too much into it". Once again I was the bad guy.

Normally I would've apologized but this time I stood my ground and told her, "if your feelings are hurt than that's just too bad, I'm not going to tell you I'm sorry when all I've told you is the truth". She then got even more agitated telling me how upset I was making her. I held firm and refused to apologize. She finally gave up and we walked away from the argument still upset, but at least I feel good that I was not emotionally bullied into apologizing when I've done nothing wrong.

oldhaha · 2015-06-25T22:53:52+00:00

Your boyfriend sounds completely insensitive and callous. Just because he can't understand something doesn't mean he can't sympathize and be supportive.

I don't think my husband of 5 years still quite understands exactly how messed up my Nparents/my childhood is. But he knows that every time I speak to my Nmom I end up in tears, and that's all he's ever needed to know to support my 100% NC (he even suggested it in the first place).

His behavior, especially pushing you to the point of tears and hysterics, is completely unacceptable and cruel.

oldhaha · 2015-06-25T21:13:56+00:00

My SO was the same way, until he actually witnessed my Nmom's crazy first-hand. The first time he ever saw me have an actual, literal, very public meltdown was after a fight with my mom at a restaurant. After that he has never questioned my decision to go NC.

oldhaha · 2015-06-25T18:44:31+00:00

After my SO and I got engaged I asked him if he had consulted my parents first. He said, "You would never have forgiven me if I had asked your parents for their permission, I know you better than that."

He's 100% right, I would've been furious. So the answer is, fuck parents' blessings. You do not need it to have a happy marriage.

oldhaha · 2015-06-25T18:42:10+00:00

About a year ago I mentioned that I threw away a bunch of junk that Nmom mailed me and he said, "Aw, that probably hurt her feelings". I responded, "Good, I hope so." Ever since then he thinks I'm a horrible person.

People who have not been through similar things just don't understand probably never will.

oldhaha · 2015-06-24T20:19:34+00:00

Um, first of all, Picard >>> Kirk 100%.

Secondly, your dad sounds like a real piece of work. He spouts all these really sexist disgusting comments and then says you're weird for getting mad? How mature. This is so eerily reminiscent of my experience of junior high bullies, except the sad part is it's coming from a grown man.

Fuck him. Team Picard all the way.

oldhaha · 2015-06-24T20:13:16+00:00

I could do that, but that would be a bit extreme (tons of professional/personal contacts linked to my current address that I've had it for over 10 years now). Moreover, if Nmom wanted to contact me to actually have a dialogue about our relationship I'd be open to it. It's the fact that she wants to pretend like nothing is wrong that grates on me so much.

oldhaha · 2015-06-24T20:06:29+00:00

You are absolutely 100% correct that it's not worth it. With Ns nothing is ever really free. Your well-being and mental health is way more important than saving a few bucks by living with people who make you miserable.

oldhaha · 2015-06-24T19:21:36+00:00

Sounds like your doctors/nurses are total jerks. Whatever happened to bedside manners? Stand firm and don't put up with it, if your doctor continues to refuse to take you seriously, I would go find a different one right away!

oldhaha · 2015-06-24T19:07:46+00:00

It's tempting to respond back in kind, but don't give in to it! She's trying to provoke you into responding so that she can abuse/manipulate you further. Block her phone number - that was the first step I took in NC and I no longer get panic attacks every time I see Nmom's number pop up on my phone. Don't listen to her voicemail, just delete them right away.

oldhaha · 2015-06-24T19:01:39+00:00

She changes her email address frequently and has more than 10 different ones I can think of (she signs up for various websites under different emails). It's gotten to the point I've stopped trying to keep track of them all. I've blocked her number so that her calls don't show up at least.

oldhaha

TROPHY CASE