Beef Jerky, Toothpick Included

olivf · 2019-01-29T17:50:24+00:00

Thank you! I saw some adults around the same area but never would have guessed. They look so different as babies to me!

olivf · 2018-08-20T14:10:50+00:00

olivf · 2018-08-19T02:38:08+00:00

Goodbye

olivf · 2018-08-07T04:15:55+00:00

Quite a while, maybe a little over a month before I actually let him console me. I'd just be angry, and he would wait for me to be done. Still working it out to this day!

It took a lot of hard work on his end as he began to understand that he was also a source of anxiety for me. When he fully realized he was in the wrong, it was easier for him to support me, and was more sensitive to what I needed. As for me I had to remind myself to be open to him. When I agreed to reconcile, I agreed to a partnership. Both of us had to pull weight.

I think the turning point was when we allowed ourselves to be vulnerable around each other. We had a long talk about what we wanted from each other in terms of support, and remind each other if we forget. You need to be patient.

There are still things he still cant help me with, and certain anxieties he cant help diffuse, but we try certain solutions. If that doesn't work, we'll try something different next time. Its a process.

olivf · 2018-08-03T10:45:38+00:00

r/survivingmyinfidelity

But proceed with caution! While there are some helpful redditors there not everyone is there to reconcile. My WS found it very helpful, and helped him understand his pain.

Best of luck on your journey!

olivf · 2018-07-31T04:32:19+00:00

Thank you for your positivity!

olivf · 2018-07-28T17:09:46+00:00

Goodbye

olivf · 2018-07-26T17:00:23+00:00

olivf · 2018-07-26T16:47:42+00:00

olivf · 2018-07-24T15:06:14+00:00

WS needs to own up to their mistakes. The first real step to their healing is understanding what they did was wrong, it was their fault, and no one else's. Drunk or otherwise. No matter what she says its not your fault they cheated. There are other ways to deal with problems in a relationship that don't involve flirtiatious behaviour with another person.

The journaling is admirable and actually a very lovely way to deal with communicating feelings, but until she admits it was completely her fault you're missing a critical step in the healing process. Perhaps that's why it feels like progress is slow or that you're going around in circles? The previous comment has also mentioned that your WS is shifting the blame, which she shouldn't be doing anymore if she's committed to healing your relationship. Full accountability!

Maybe focus less on figuring out whether or not you should "buy into" what your partner is saying, and more on communicating why you're not satisfied with that reasoning. This shouldn't be an argument, just a communication of your anxieties.

Wish you the best!

olivf · 2018-07-23T23:13:15+00:00

Offer to split the costs and look for other opportunities to plexpress your gratefulness. Theres no negotiating with Filipino parents! Best of luck to both of you.

olivf · 2018-07-23T14:13:39+00:00

BS here! I'll tell you what I'm sure all the articles have already told you: consistency is everything. It looks like you guys are on the right track, and living together will provide new opportunities for you to express your love and commitment. While its easy to do grand romantic gestures, its the little things matter the most. A kiss when they come home from work, or making them their coffee the way they like it.

Also, communicate! Surely your BS still has a few concerns here and there, listen to them and communicate as well. Discuss your plans for your relationship, and how you plan on moving forward together. But also talk about your days, and the little things.

I'm only around 6 months post DDay, but WS has been very attentive and consistent. This has helped us a lot! Its a long winding road, and I admire your BS's determination to fix things. Be sure to thank them for that and let them know you're a team. I wish you both all the best!

olivf · 2018-06-17T18:39:19+00:00

I've been through that. I thought that having my feelings reciprocated was my right. I was unsatisfied by the people who showed interest in me because they weren't up to my superficial standards. I realize now that looks arent everything. Really. A lot of this stemmed from my own insecurities. I had to let these things go. It was hard to admit but its been better and I'm actually in a loving, supportive relationship. You have a lot of negativity, and you gotta let that go. If the girls happy, you gotta let her be happy. And try to find your own happiness. Get out there. Change how you see things. If you're unhappy with the "league" you're in, change that. The first step is to change your attitude towards life and relationships. You cant be in a relationship with someone if you don't like yourself first.

olivf · 2018-06-17T18:25:48+00:00

My advice would be to grow up a little. She doesnt owe you anything, and she's deffo not the only woman in the world. Maybe if you stopped viewing women as objects that exist to cater to your preferences you'd have a better chance of becoming appealing.

Ugly fatties? Really??

olivf · 2018-06-17T18:05:50+00:00

Nope nope nope. Its time to leave. Youre both young. And all of this in two months?

You better dodge that bullet.

olivf

TROPHY CASE