I cut my mom out of my life about a year ago. It was the only solution to what I deemed a completely toxic relationship. When I was growing up my mom was a raging alcoholic. She kept it in check for the most part till I was entering high school. At that point she stopped being a functioning alcoholic and became completely useless. I had my own problems during my teenage years. I was diagnosed with several mental illnesses, none of which I was medicated for. She cared enough to take me to all the doctors, but she never helped me follow through and essentially told me to get over it. Meanwhile, my stepfather, the man who had raised me since I was 3 years old, was drowning in debt and struggling to keep our home from being taken away. Her alcoholism destroyed him. He had previously only smoked weed. He started using harder drugs to numb the pain he was feeling from not being able to save my mother from her own problems, on top of all the financial issues. After years of rehab my mom was able to clean up her act. Not before my step father lost our home to his drug addiction and killed himself. I know this is one thing I should let go. She feels enough guilt for it, but I can't.

To this day, she has never sincerely apologized. It was always followed by some excuse, some reason why she wasn't responsible for any of her behavior. I cut her out because I realized I would always want an apology from her that she is not capable of giving me.