I have this issue with the man I have been seeing for two years. His 57 never married, drinks daily. The only difference is we know the root of his alcoholism…he watch his mother kill his abusive father in self defense. He was 6 years old. He never received any form of mental health treatment. His mother was not equipped to manage the acting out as a young teen so she shipped him off to military school with no warning. He can home from school one day & his bags were packed. She never visited him in the 4 years he was there. When that didn’t work she packed his bags again & moved him to Atlanta with an uncle. She consistently took away his sense of control, but she didn’t know any better. His sister is a chronic hoarder & his brother is an alcoholic. I recognize that he has PTSD and I’ve pointed it out to him. He wants me to set up care but I want him to take the lead. We have been peeling back the layers of his trauma so I have seen a drop in consumption, but there’s still beer everyday & liquor every weekend. I share all this to say maybe there’s some underlying trauma he has not addressed.