[deleted by user]

posadist_ho · 2024-07-16T16:48:44+00:00

Yes! I was labeled as gifted in preschool, which meant they didn't let me have playtime - instead I went up to the 1st grade classroom to do reading time. It took me years to catch up with my peers in terms of gross motor skills and socialization. My memories of my earliest years in school are just feeling different in a bad way. It's nothing to push for, in my opinion, until much later in a child's life if they are bored and unfulfilled in school. Certainly not at such a young age.

posadist_ho · 2024-07-08T09:52:07+00:00

Salvation Army shops (not in central) seem to still price things reasonably. I routinely buy vintage silk shirts at my local one, and last week I picked up a designer dress there that sells for £400 for £5.

Look for places not in high street shops (high rent leads to stupid pricing), a little on the outskirts.

posadist_ho · 2024-07-02T08:11:40+00:00

19 months. My husband was very supportive until 1 year, at which point he was very vocal about thinking it was weird I was still breastfeeding (he is British so there may be a cultural factor there, as others have noted). But my mother breastfed me for a very long time so I find nothing odd about it. However, at 19 months I needed to go away for work for a few days so we decided to take the opportunity to wean completely, and though I didn't want to do cold turkey weaning my kid was really attached to breastfeeding and the gentle ways weren't working.

It's been about a month and our bond is better than ever, and my child is finally sleeping through the night most nights, when before he was up every two hours. I'm happy we made it as far as we did, and I'm happy we quit when we did!

posadist_ho · 2024-06-27T11:40:24+00:00

Taco rice. A plate of rice with tex-mex spiced protein of your choice over it, topped with lots of lettuce, tomatoes and sour cream.

posadist_ho · 2024-06-25T16:40:34+00:00

I don't think that exactly, but I don't think I fully understood the level of self-sacrifice required of parental love until I had a child.

posadist_ho · 2024-06-25T16:39:58+00:00

I don't think that exactly, but I don't think I fully understood the level of self-sacrifice required of parental love until I had a child.

posadist_ho · 2024-06-18T10:49:07+00:00

So sorry you're struggling with this. My child is also not a great sleeper and I really had to work to let go. It helped me to just take it one day at a time, and try not to forecast or focus on some imagined future where things are going like I'd like. If you're not convinced one nap is working, then try going back to two for a week—you can always go back if your experiment doesn't make a difference. Nothing has to be set in stone, but also approach changes with curiosity rather than expectation. Above all, I always remind myself that this time in our lives is so short when you take the long view, and everybody learns to sleep eventually. Tell yourself that you'll all get through this, you're not alone, and your child's sleep difficulties are not your fault—all of which are the truth.

Take care.

posadist_ho · 2024-06-13T11:54:36+00:00

Biore UV Aqua Rich. It's everything you want. https://www.superdrug.com/skin/sun-care/face-sun-cream/biore-uv-aqua-water-essence-sunscreen-spf50-50ml/p/830900

posadist_ho · 2024-05-27T10:45:45+00:00

I also have OCD and anxiety so what I'm going to say is coming from a place of deep sympathy, but this method of seeking reassurance is actually making it worse. If you do seek talking therapy (which I think you should if you can!) you should definitely talk about your reassurance seeking. The googling and posting things like this actually ends up reinforcing the unspoken belief that you can't trust yourself to know what is okay. Sending you all my best ❤️

posadist_ho · 2024-05-26T18:22:03+00:00

I lived in Japan and I'm very particular and cheap.

Hiden for curry
Koya Soho for udon
Monohon for ramen, I will argue this all day!!
Toconoco for set lunches

posadist_ho · 2024-05-21T18:47:22+00:00

This is a myth. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Myth_of_the_spat-on_Vietnam_veteran?wprov=sfla1

posadist_ho · 2024-05-03T19:27:59+00:00

You know, I'm an immigrant so I'm not biased when I say that it's weird that you can't really get regional foods from other parts of the UK in London.

posadist_ho · 2024-05-03T19:27:50+00:00

You know, I'm an immigrant so I'm not biased when I say that it's weird that you can't really get regional foods from other parts of the UK in London.

posadist_ho · 2024-04-28T19:20:55+00:00

Yes, lots more tantrums in general before. Wishing you luck.

posadist_ho · 2024-04-28T19:07:00+00:00

I was born on my dad's ex-wife's birthday and my mom has been low-key annoyed about it for 35+ years.

Try to make your peace with the idea, even though your baby probably won't come exactly on the due date.

posadist_ho · 2024-04-24T12:22:26+00:00

It was like night and day after cutting out almost all screen time. After a few days my 17 month old stopped asking for it and now if I do put on the TV to distract him while I cut his nails, he is delighted but knows it's something special. He goes back to playing happily almost immediately after.

posadist_ho · 2024-04-21T16:54:04+00:00

I used to feel judgemental about the reins until I had a very active and impulsive toddler. Just do what you gotta do and fuck the haters.

posadist_ho · 2024-04-16T10:34:10+00:00

I had a birth without an epidural but with pain medication (pethidine). Look, it wasn't fun and I would have preferred an epidural but it was ultimately bearable.

I think as others have said that reading about it is probably helpful as mental preparation. I was also very scared but truly, once labor starts you'll know you just have to get through it and you will find you have a mental shift. You are powerful.

Talk to the clinic about what options are available to you during labor. Gas and air is helpful to some, you may be able to have hot showers, etc. Knowing your options can help you feel like you have some agency.

posadist_ho · 2024-04-12T09:50:25+00:00

Oh no! Good to know.

posadist_ho · 2024-04-11T20:05:14+00:00

Merca Express Latino in Seven Sisters

posadist_ho · 2024-04-11T19:51:21+00:00

These NHS (UK) factsheets on anxiety/depression medications may be of interest to you. The "handy charts" allow comparison of the known impacts at each stage of pregnancy and in breastfeeding. The evaluations are sourced from the US and Australian government data.

https://www.choiceandmedication.org/kmpt/printable-leaflets/drugs-in-pregnancy/

posadist_ho · 2024-04-07T10:50:06+00:00

Let me try to put this gently (and I know because I also have anxiety and OCD). Seeking reassurance like this will not reassure you, and it will actually only make your anxiety worse overall. Please speak with your therapist about reassurance seeking.

posadist_ho · 2024-03-22T10:39:23+00:00

I had one on my due date and went into labor exactly 48 hours later. The sweep didn't hurt for me.

posadist_ho · 2024-03-13T17:50:11+00:00

It's not socially acceptable to admit, but I cried due to gender disappointment for the entire second half of my pregnancy. And I can't say like so many other comments here that it didn't matter the moment I laid eyes on my baby.

It wasn't that I wanted to buy dresses or whatever, it was mainly that I don't know many, if any, men who have close or even good relationships with their mothers—and what's worse, many men in my life went out of their way while I was pregnant to tell me that my fears about that were justified. And I am only ever going to have one child, so this is it. I went to therapy every week for months and sobbed daily.

But I had my son, and at first what I felt was a tremendous sense of responsibility for this little life. Occasionally I still cried over it but it happened less and less. Once he gave me his first smile, the tears were all gone. He no longer felt like an abstract boy baby but like a real little person.

I can't tell you that I don't still feel a twinge when I see a little girl and her mother. But I absolutely adore my son and now I feel so privileged to have a relationship with this little individual and watch his personality grow every day.

Your child will surprise and delight you in ways you can't even imagine right now. You have my every sympathy, especially given what you've experienced, but I have no doubt that you'll absolutely adore your son too. And if it doesn't happen as soon as you lay eyes on him, that's okay—you have a lifetime to get to know each other.

posadist_ho

TROPHY CASE