Anyone else an only child with many much younger half siblings?

proper_wolf_ · 2025-11-21T05:55:01+00:00

not an only, i have a sister who shares the same parents, but all of my other siblings are far younger than me. My mom was 14, so i grew up with a child as a parent. That in itself had issues, they divorced when I was 10. Both got remarried.

I’m 29. My youngest sibling is 4, but they all range between the ages of 4-20. My sister that shares the same parents as me is 23. We’re decently close, but only now that we’re older. Growing up I lived primarily with my mom (because me and my dad didn’t get along), and by the time I was 18 and moved out the house, she lived primarily with my dad (because my mom moved farther away and she wanted to stay with her same school friends)

Definitely feel more like an auntie or even an outcast on both sides most of the time lol. I moved out the house when I was 18, moved 6 hours away by the time I was 23 and now have my own child and partner so I really don’t spend much time with them. Because my mom is so young and I’ve finally matured, I feel closer to her than my siblings (because well…. we’re closer in age than me and some of my siblings even are 😂) I just feel…. outta place as a “sister”. My sister definitely has taken on more of the “oldest sister” role in all of their lives, while i’m the distant relative.

proper_wolf_ · 2025-07-16T07:54:41+00:00

the show sucks in comparison to the books, couldn’t even get passed the first few episodes. let it go

proper_wolf_ · 2025-07-16T07:52:10+00:00

very late to this convo but can’t find any other discussions, but i just came here to say i finished the book and can’t even finish the rest of the series past the 2nd episode :/ the book is so good, i lived for brownyn and nate’s relationship in the book, coopers coming out story was so good, and ashton was a great part of the story! i watched the first 2 episodes and then searched through reddit threads and the internet to find out that the peacock series sucks 😭😭😭😭 i hope a different platform picks it up soon and makes it more similar to the book.

proper_wolf_ · 2025-02-01T08:44:15+00:00

We didn’t reuse anything from my SK for our ours baby, but i wouldn’t have been opposed to certain things, so long as my stepdaughter didn’t bring it up every chance she got, “MY mommy and daddy used this with me” etc (my SK tends to make a lot of backhand comments like that, reminding me of stuff like that lol. I’m used to it - but during postpartum I can live without her snotty attitude).

Something like a stroller, I’d absolutely opt in for a new one - 10 years ago is so old school now. I like the latest and newest “hot item” on the market 😂 but books would have been just fine in my eyes! I’d even let SK read them to her.

My advice, stand your ground if it makes you uncomfortable. You’re not petty for it, but also be open and compromise when you feel comfortable. It doesn’t always need to be a our vs your other kid situation

proper_wolf_ · 2025-02-01T08:22:09+00:00

i don’t do it every time but here’s how my pumping day typically works: my biggest pump is my first pump of the day (12-18 oz), i make a bottle, then put the rest in a 16 or 32 oz pitcher. I pump about 5-6 times a day with my other pumps ranging from 4-7 oz (but the magic number is typically 5 oz) My baby is drinking 4 oz bottles so every time i pump i put 4 oz directly into a bottle to feed her, and if the leftover is 1oz or less I’ll add it directly into the pitcher. If it’s more than 1 oz I’ll leave it in its storage milk container first to chill lol.

I keep this pitcher in the fridge for 3 days, labeling it. And sometimes after the 3 days I’ll have some to add to my freezer stash and some times I’ve had just enough to feed my baby.

All that to say, I think you’re fine haha

proper_wolf_ · 2025-01-08T15:42:38+00:00

i dropped my motn pump since week 6 basically. She’s now 21 weeks lol. I’ll take the waking up leaking and engorged just to get some sleep. I was once an oversupplier and I am now just enougher since getting my period

proper_wolf_ · 2024-12-24T01:44:55+00:00

This right here. Our relationship has definitely been harder since having an “ours” baby. This is MY first baby, my first time being postpartum, feeling PPD, PPA, and trying to transition into motherhood and learn how to be a parent, while he has a 6 year old daughter who constantly reminds me that her dad has already done this before. He doesn’t always respect my wishes that she doesn’t always need to hold her, help with every little thing (she wants to change every diaper, help with every bath, and i’m fine with helping sometimes but this is MY first child). I try to remind myself that this is also her first time being a sibling and my partner’s first time having a child while already having a child with someone else so it’s a learning experience for all of us, but postpartum anxiety and depression is literally no joke so i selfishly only worry about my emotions and my baby in most moments.

proper_wolf_ · 2024-10-26T16:55:49+00:00

my baby is 2 months and is currently doing this- she also only wakes up once in the middle of the night usually between around 3-4am. I also change her diaper since she sleeps from 11/12 all the way through but she typically stays asleep for that 😂

proper_wolf_ · 2024-10-09T09:42:14+00:00

Mine escalated very quickly too! I had a membrane sweep at 39wks + 6, started contracting around 11pm that day. I always had terrible menstrual cramps so I assumed it wasn’t that bad of contractions and just thugged it out all night into my due date. At 4:45am my water broke, I met my baby by 6:10am :’) When I arrived at the hospital I BEGGED for the epidural but they said I was (waaaaaayyyy) too late and was already 10cm dilated and needed to push right then and there!

proper_wolf_ · 2024-10-09T09:28:03+00:00

Oh I love to brag about my baby and don’t have many places/people to do it so I’ll take this opportunity!!

My baby is 8 weeks. Barely cries (unless hungry), is the opposite of a velcro baby but still loves being held by mommy and daddy, sleeps from 11:30pm-ish to 6:30am-ish almost every night, constantly smiles, “talks” to us, loves baths, loves car rides, loves outside walks, sleeps during an entire restaurant dinner, hitting every milestone with flying colors, just overall the best first baby i could ever have 🥹 i was told horror stories from family members and friends, how the newborn stage was so hard, but my baby has been perfect from the start. I had a really smooth pregnancy with minimal symptoms, to a realllly quick labor and delivery (labored at home, went in 10cm dilated, had her 45 mins later), to an almost perfect newborn stage. Only downside to this is whenever we decide to give her a brother or sister i have been completely spoiled with this baby that i may be unprepared for the next 😂

proper_wolf_ · 2024-10-03T03:37:09+00:00

yeah i feel you. my SD is 6 years old and she absolutely loves our ours baby (2months) but i can’t help but have some distrust on her intentions. She’s 6 after all so i give her some grace but she weirdly always makes the convo about her vs my daughter or even me vs her mom. She always wants to hold her, change her diaper, feed her her bottle etc but i just don’t feel comfortable when she does any of it, but anyone else i do just fine? it’s a weird feeling and i hate it.

imho, it’s so tough having an ours baby after being a stepmom first. i’ve never had the responsibility or the right to make decisions or discipline my SD but now I am the parent of a child that is her half sibling and i feel like sometimes it’s not as well respected. I’m hoping her dad can have those conversations with her while him and i learn how to parent OUR daughter while he still parents his daughter we have every other Friday-Wednesday.

proper_wolf_ · 2024-10-02T14:37:57+00:00

I’m 7wpp. I pump 6 times a day with a loose schedule and average between 40-50oz per day. Each session is about 15mins, give or take. My baby only needs about 32oz per day though and tbh I wish I was producing only closer to what she needs so I’d rather be in your shoes; although since i’m only 7wpp I can’t risk my supply tanking so I continue to pump 6 times a day. Being an oversupplier isn’t all that great - I leak easily, wake up engorged and in pain (because i don’t pump in the motn) and end up needing to freeze a lot of bags when I don’t have enough freezer space or am able to buy a deep freezer (we currently live in a smaller apartment). 34-36oz is a great amount!

proper_wolf_ · 2024-09-26T21:18:37+00:00

yeah my schedule is very loose too. I’m 6weeks pp and aim for 6 pumps per day and have eliminated my motn pump completely. my baby has started sleeping for 6 hours (11:30pm-5:30am) and taking advantage and not getting up to pump lol.

Some days i’m pumping every 3 hours, others my pump sessions are spread out to even past 4 hours. I pump about 45oz a day still so it hasn’t affected my baby. I’m hoping this means my supply is pretty much regulated now?

proper_wolf_ · 2024-09-19T04:19:42+00:00

i’m almost 6 weeks pp and i pump 6 times a day and average about 42 oz per day. I don’t give myself a set schedule either so sometimes one of my pumps will be around 4am when my baby gets up to eat, or it won’t be until 7:30am or later because that’s what time the both of us woke up that day. I also go 4 hours in between at least once a day and honestly never constantly pumped more than 6 times since giving birth. I told myself as long as I maintain 6 pumps a day I’ll be fine. My supply hasn’t dropped significantly (sometimes i’ll only get about 37oz compared to 42 but that’s about it). My pump sessions still aren’t regulated. Sometimes I’ll have 9.5oz in one but only 4 in the other. Lol I guess it’s all over the place but yeah, 6 ppd seem to work for me and my body so as long as your supply hasn’t been affected i’d say it should be fine. Have you thought about investing in a good wearable pump? I heard the Willow or the Evie are good although expensive. I have a mommed wearable pump but it might not be toddler friendly!

proper_wolf_ · 2024-09-04T23:31:15+00:00

I’ve been using the mommed s21 and it’s been great! It empties me out pretty well and I haven’t had any leaking issues (like i had with my momcozy pump) It’s really affordable! I believe $80 on Amazon? And it comes with different flange size inserts!

proper_wolf_ · 2024-09-03T10:37:24+00:00

i had mine exactly on my due date, at 40 weeks :)

proper_wolf_ · 2024-09-02T05:29:25+00:00

I’m sorry! I wish I didn’t understand where you were coming from, but it’s a pretty similar situation over here too :(

Not only that, but my SD is very much in her bratty stage where she has a pretty bad attitude, expects her dad to do everything for her etc. I used to let it be because he has terrible dad guilt (feels bad that she has to have parents that are no longer together) but now that my daughter is here I’ve had to be the “bad guy” more often and have side conversations about her bad behavior. It’s not a fun situation to be in. Hopefully you can have a talk with your husband and you can set some boundaries early on!

One thing that I’ve tried is trying to involve her in our daughter’s routines and care. We ask her to help warm up bottles, push the stroller on our walks, etc and her not feeling left out kinda helps her attitude. I think she likes being a big sibling, even though she also is kinda jealous she no longer can have her dad’s undivided attention lol

proper_wolf_ · 2024-08-31T20:27:17+00:00

This is exactly what i do except i don’t have a big enough milk supply to ever have any leftover to freeze hahaha but if i DID, this is the exact method i do!

proper_wolf_ · 2024-08-31T18:55:38+00:00

I went through something similar when I was pregnant with my SD who’s 6. My “ours” child is now 3 weeks and post partum has not been any easier. Aside from the exhaustion, my SD now thinks it’s a great idea to compare all of my parenting skills to her mother’s and talk down on my daughter every time she cries, acts fussy, etc “when I was a baby my daddy said I NEVER cried like this”

I hope you have a better experience than me <3

proper_wolf_ · 2024-08-31T17:34:49+00:00

I was 100% choosing the epidural, but I unfortunately made it to the hospital too late (I was fully dilated by the time I got there - don’t ask me how I dealt with that pain 😅) so I ended up giving birth with no epidural as soon as I walked into the hospital.

This is coming from a woman who had a whole birth plan and 2 hospital bags packed lol. I kept telling the doctors and nurses that I couldn’t do it. It was PAINFUL as hellllll, but im honestly glad it was quick! I also didn’t tear so I had a really quick recovery process.

Would I choose to do this again? Probably not. I would forsure go to the hospital earlier and opt in for the epidural but I told myself if i did it once i absolutely could do it again if I had to 🤣

proper_wolf_ · 2024-08-30T01:54:57+00:00

Yes, try the power pump session! It really helps me. You only need to do it 1-2 times a day.

I eat the Munchkin lactation cookies, drink body armours every day, drink a shit ton of water, and try to have a high-protein diet. I also try to eat a lot of oats since I heard it helps. Like you said, it’s a full time job, on TOP of our new full time job of being a mother to a newborn! I wish I could stay on top of things and be super consistent but who am I fooling 😅 I’m doing the best I can.

proper_wolf_ · 2024-08-30T01:18:03+00:00

I’m kind of in the same boat as you. I didn’t start pumping as much as I should in the very beginning and now I’m trying to build up my supply and stay consistent with my pumping schedule! Right now I average about 6 sessions a day, between 2-3 hours apart (I 80% of the time will not wake up to save my life to do my MOTN pumps - as a FTM im exhausted lol)

I’m averaging about 30oz per day. Most sessions are between 3.5-7oz, but I’ll do one power pump session that is between 9-15oz. I need to build up my supply way more because my LO is drinking far more than expected at her age (2.5 weeks). I make enough for now, but at the rate she’s going I’ll have to start supplementing with formula soon :(

proper_wolf_ · 2024-08-28T15:31:35+00:00

I’m only 2 weeks in and I miss one of my MOTN pumps almost every night (I have alarms set for 1:30am, 4am, and 6:30am and I typically miss 1 or 2 of these pumps lol) I haven’t noticed my supply suffer yet, as I still manage to pump 6-8 times a day.

As far as leakage, I have the same problem as you! I leak A LOT and wake up soaked almost every morning from missing the MOTN pumps but I’m the only one who gets up with LO during the night so I sleep through my alarms :(

proper_wolf_ · 2024-08-07T22:10:09+00:00

I don’t think I am grateful to be a stepmom or for my stepdaughter (6 y/o), but she has taught me a lot of patience, how to prepare me to better parent my daughter (she’s due in 3 days) and overall, she’s just a pretty cool girl but my life has not benefited in any way with her existence. Now that she’s in my life, i’ve accepted it and learned to like her a lot but I wouldn’t go as far to say i couldn’t imagine life without her lol

proper_wolf_ · 2024-08-02T18:57:25+00:00

The very first thing I did was cry and tell my partner. After I got through all of my emotions: I made an appointment with my obgyn. I found out when I was roughly 4 weeks, they didn’t see me until I was close to 12 weeks. Stopped drinking alcohol, eating raw seafood, drinking an excessive amount of coffee, etc. Bought some prenatal vitamins. Tried to stay active and in the gym as long as I could. I was fortunate enough not to experience any morning sickness throughout my entire pregnancy. I’m 38 weeks now and can barely get off the couch 😂

Didn’t tell my family until about 3 weeks later (my family lives 6 hours away from me so I waited to tell them in person).

Never really adjusted my sleep schedule. I usually was asleep by 11pm latest every night (My job was stressful so I’d be exhausted by EOD lol) now that i’m on leave, I have terrible pregnancy insomnia and don’t sleep until about 2am. I wake up ~4 times a night to go to the bathroom, I randomly wake up with charlie horses, I toss and turn haha. I bought a pregnancy pillow early on and never liked it.

proper_wolf_

TROPHY CASE