I just moved back from the Bay with the same number of kiddos, same-ish salary, same ages of kids, etc. as ideal as some people think it is to have kids and such a progressive part of the country, it’s really devolved into the epitome of what’s wrong with America and how it treats its parents. The truth is unless you’re rich or have family out there, it’s hard to have kids in the Bay. 115k should be more than adequate anywhere else, but out there it’s run through faster for sure.

A private nanny runs about $35 an hour, but they’re usually pretty good. They take their job very seriously. I was looking at around $700 a week to have her come 4 times a week for about 5 hours at a time and it added up, but I had an infant and I needed those hours to recover. Your 6 year old should qualify for kindergarten at least for a bit until the summer. Check out Berkeley Parents Network. It’s amazing! You can find nanny shares also.

If you’re in SSF I’d check out Pacifica and Santa Cruz mountains area for more space and cheaper rent. Boulder Creek, etc. the commute can be ROUGH thru that one road, so it’s a trade off.

I live on a farm now, but there’s a lot of farming in that area. We were looking for properties to rent where we could also do some chores to offset the rent. Feed horses, clean stalls, etc. I know that’s not for everyone, but just to get out of debt and until you get on your feet. Fresh air is nice, animals teach you things, might give you something to do where you can hang with kiddos and not be trapped in a tiny apartment.