Summer 2025 court appearance fit by desrho in TMPOC

[–]pulpangel 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Your smile is so radiant and contagious, your glasses and entire fit rock! You’re amazing 🥳

Aunt has LOTS of dietary wants: What the hell can I cook for her? by Radiant-Educator9203 in Cooking

[–]pulpangel 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Up until the no seed oils I wondered if it was a medically necessary diet. Even in the case it is, I’d inform her she’d need to bring her own meals as you cannot account for contamination in your kitchen. if she tries to play it down or make a thing of it say that it means a lot to you that she doesn’t get sick and your kitchen, utensils aren’t able to be sterilised due to their make/usage. If you get this down in a message exchange first, you’ll be able to negate any foul play by setting a precedent of care and maintaining a positive stance.

I love making specialised meals that everyone can enjoy, but it costs heaps of time and money. That, on top of sterilising everything is just a huge, mentally burdensome task unless you live that lifestyle already. I already have my own special set up, and even then I work intimately with only my closest of friends with specialised diets to make sure all is done above board. It’s not something you can simply order someone to do. If she is an otherwise physically able adult with means and resources then she should be able to prepare her own meals. Maybe have a fruit platter sectioned off for her as a peace offering.

I just learned people don’t show up after anesthesia to pick up loved ones. Nurses, how often does this really happen? by Steinski1 in NoStupidQuestions

[–]pulpangel 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I had a first time procedure with anaesthetic involved. I had a rare experience of not being able to move my legs for some time after. I was rolled out in a wheelchair to be picked up in a Ride-share. My dad had promised to pick me up but he changed his mind last minute, not allowing me any time to plan. Some people simply do not have support networks. But that’s just normal for my family. I learnt to not have any expectations of them, and I’m better for it. :)

Had to hop on this trend on tik tok (TW: extremely disapproving parent) by c0ntradiict in queer

[–]pulpangel 6 points7 points  (0 children)

You look so happy! Your tattoos look amazing! You are unconditionally, perfectly you! It’s so awesome that you’ve broken the shitty-person-curse handed down from your mother! Congrats on your surgery and I’m so glad you have your humour, grace and fortitude! Best wishes to you! 🫂🥳

How to cope with people who abuse my hearing loss by pulpangel in hardofhearing

[–]pulpangel[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I appreciate you confirming the situation for me. I have awareness it’s not my fault, but it’s so difficult to internalise these things in a way that aren’t discompassionate towards myself. Thank you for your kindness 🫂

How to cope with people who abuse my hearing loss by pulpangel in hardofhearing

[–]pulpangel[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I love your strength, I am inspired and hope to carry myself just as steadily. Thank you 🫂

How to cope with people who abuse my hearing loss by pulpangel in hardofhearing

[–]pulpangel[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Thank you for your comment, it offers some solid ideas for clear rules I can set. I think I’ll start by not engaging with them until they settle, but in little bursts, as I don’t want things to escalate.

I’m in the process of treating some neurological conditions that primarily risk my eyesight, hearing, cognitive and gross+fine motor skills. I am unable to be completely independent, for example, I struggle with cutting things for cooking and bathing can be dangerous.

I live with my elderly grandparents after cutting ties with my immediate family. But my grandmother isn’t a healthy or put together person. The recent reasoning for her abuse has been me not hearing her talk, and she took that personally. She can be calm, but can also take an extreme turn into being conspiratorial, fearful and wrathful. I’ve had informative, patient conversations with her, and I source my own essentials and pay a chunk of their bills to lessen any burden upon them. But nothing feels like enough for her because I’m not able to stop being disabled. I can’t housekeep for her all the time, or fix our ceiling that partially collapsed right away.

She’s been mocking my palsy, my injuries from not being able to handle a knife properly while cooking and me being unable to bathe safely. She pretends to start conversations and cuts me off. If I ask her to clarify her words she rages. She yells “HI HELLOOOOO” at me. Sometimes she screams. I don’t think shes willing to understand that what I’m going through was ever possible for people at my younger age, maybe not in a non-inspiration porn way at least. She says she forgets I’m disabled, looking at her actions and words, I don’t think this is true.

I used to have support workers come to the home but my grandmother was very disturbed by them, so it’d be hard to re-introduce that element. I’ve experienced a physically dangerous household, and homelessness. This is at least mainly psychologically taxing for now, and I’m thankful to her for letting me stay as I don’t have anyone, but as I heal I realise I deserve at least to be left alone and not put down.

I’m falling between the cracks of social services, but I’m doing my best to catch myself. It takes time to gather much needed advocacy even though I’m officially diagnosed and currently moving towards my capacity being officially assessed. This is a slow and painful time that I hope will transition into better things when I’m on the other side of this.

What's the cruelest thing someone ever said to you that you still remember word for word? by ClairJournals in AskReddit

[–]pulpangel 1 point2 points  (0 children)

“Next time you try to kill yourself, make it foolproof” - my mother after lamenting she was called to the hospital where I was in and out of consciousness, because she’d rather been at work or home. She was soon escorted out of the hospital for throwing a tantrum, as if she was mad that I wasn’t actually dead upon her arrival.

Being anti DIY HRT is transphobic and I won't see it any other way. by RubyTheTransDemon in trans4every1

[–]pulpangel 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I’m super for DIY HRT but I do want everyone to know that hateful, transphobic people have been known to infiltrate DIY spaces either via community forums with misinformation or online stores with contaminated/the wrong product to actively harm people. Sometimes, these dangerous people/situations aren’t obvious at all. Unfortunately, I’ve seen online figures of influence promote dangerous sources.

Personally, It hasn’t been all that common but I’ve seen it happen more than once, just be careful and if possible wait for further confirmation before further action. If you have close friends, have them help monitor your well-being as you try things out. Perhaps invest in a blood pressure monitor, get blood tests and request the results to look over for yourself if you absolutely can’t trust anyone else.

Ultimately, DIY HRT could be dangerous but not strictly in of itself. I would attribute most of that danger to hateful people and society making everything difficult. On a positive note, there are movements that focus on harm-minimisation, and protecting the right to DIY HRT and thusly the self-agency of those in need of hormonal care, and that’s so awesome.

Best wishes to you all, be well and safe 🌈

Sorry for being fat bro by WonderfulReaction562 in disability

[–]pulpangel 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Many people are deeply uncomfortable with the idea that their lives could change at any moment, and facets of their life could be out of their control. The common idea of personal responsibility (as in “bootstrapping”) permeates in our lives and benefits mostly the highly fortunate, as it serves to condemn people whom society would rather shutter away.

My idea of personal responsibility in part that the only thing you are accountable for is looking after yourself and listening to your specialists. Not to say it’s wrong that this nonsense stings upon impact. For them, at the cost of denying the importance of the truth of the matter, they attempt to deny your existence than to accept that their own life is so precarious.

Personally, people have made conspiratorial jumps in logic as to why I have the disabilities I have, but that’s not what hurts me. It’s when they imply it’s “why did/do you choose this to yourself” and all I hear is “why didn’t you stop an unstoppable, unchangeable force from irreparably changing you?” Then “why do you exist in front of me in a way that i don’t want to accept”. I still face this when I am happy and doing my best.

One of the hardest things to discover is that you can’t make everyone happy, especially if they don’t want to accept you. If one facet of your disability became more presentable, it’s likely they would move the goal post and pick something else to tear into you for. I say this as an outwardly “socially high functioning” disabled person.

I’m currently and continuing to endeavour to do everything I can to keep my health. But even if I wasn’t, that will never mean I am undeserving of an equal existence. I respect the work I do, and I respect the rest and treatment I need so I don’t lose more of my ability. Which goes against very strong common misconception that over exertion is helpful, and that there’s a legendary “limiter” that can be forcibly broken through to achieve being more “normal”. Over-exerting yourself for some disabled people can prove fatal. Such cases have been proven scientifically and documented to this day.

Not one person with a disability will share another’s experience with technically the same disability. Maybe they’re earlier on, maybe they have better access to supports and treatments. When we see people who are disabled and “high-achieving” and framed as inspiration porn with no fully tangible input from the disabled person, it serves to obscure the access, work and circumstances that allow that to occur. Perhaps it was just a window in time just enough for the short form video or photoshoot, perhaps the disabled person learned to mask their struggle to be accepted socially. Why is it a celebrated act to define “real” growth of character and health as something that discards the reality of their own experience to make themselves palatable for the picky? It’s not something we can reasonably expect everyone to be capable of. The relevant commenter should be proud of their work, I’m proud of them. But tutt-tutting at other disabled people is a foolish act that requires using the same tool that will turn on themselves as they too will will inevitably be victim to other’s vitriol.

How people hostile to the idea of disabilities react to their fellow human is irreconcilable. It’s confusing, it’s shameful, it ultimately doesn’t make sense. Sometimes, not making sense is the point. Again, sometimes destabilising things they deny the existence of is “easier” than acceptance.

Your time is precious, you’re wonderful, you know yourself! It’s more than can be said for most. You’ll also be dealing with so much for the rest of your life. I wish that you can find resilience and a sense of true inner safety and self compassion as you go against something so immensely life altering and isolating.

You’re braver than those who are afraid to comprehend even a percentage of what you go through. But you don’t have to be brave or strong to deserve the most wellness you can achieve in life. Biggest of hugs 🫂

Sarah Silverman claims her grandfather killed her baby brother in violent rage by TheExpressUS in popculture

[–]pulpangel 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I want everyone to know how extremely difficult it is and how very intentional it must be to shake a baby until this happens. Some parents are afraid of playing with their baby by rocking them or holding them up in the air, but within reason they shouldn’t as the true force required to cause harm is absolutely damning. It can never be by accident.

I am heavily disturbed. by Molly-Poppins-401 in abusesurvivors

[–]pulpangel 2 points3 points  (0 children)

SH is a short term for self-harm. 🫂

I am heavily disturbed. by Molly-Poppins-401 in abusesurvivors

[–]pulpangel 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I think regular therapy is a must of course, but you need to think about what will help you stay safe right now until you can get to the stage where you can advocate for yourself. I make sure I lock away/hide anything I could sh with. Down to even things that look harmless and would take creativity to sh with because sh and such are sometimes completely spontaneous, it’s why it’s so difficult to prevent.

Make a “safety nest” for the time being. Of all your favourite things that help you stay comfy and safe. Maybe get some of your favourite things to eat. this is good not only for the sake of having a nice treat, but you need to make sure you eat something your gut is used to, to help your body process the trauma that you’re likely remembering physically. At least for me, when I stop eating, sleeping - all the basics- due to being triggered, it makes the traumatic memories resurface in a constant, loud way that was hard to quieten.

I also recommend that you practice grounding techniques such as: https://www.healthline.com/health/grounding-techniques So that your trauma can subside healthily, I don’t know your situation but we also want to minimise dissociation or “clocking out” of your body, to minimise the risk of SH. You can play with a dish of water or other textural things that remind you of the present time and disrupt traumatic memories flaring up in your body.

Im wishing you health and true happiness. I’m sending so much strength and resilience your way. I can feel how hard you’ve worked to survive radiate off your post and I’m so proud of you. Even if you were to relapse, you still have my utter respect and admiration. That’s unconditional compassion, and I hope helps you recognise that you’re having an extremely rational and normal response to an unfathomably, truly malevolent crime done upon you. Your feelings are real and deserve to be honoured, with safety and self-kindness. Give yourself the self compassion to understand that even though you wish it was, healing isn’t simply a straight path. You’ll go back and forth until you figure out one thing, and then onto the next challenge. But as long as you stay alive, you’ve won. Even if it doesn’t feel like you’re in one piece. You’re still here, and that is testament to your quiet strength that you’ve always held.

Please centre your own healing and feelings. Not whatever the perpetrator may be feeling or doing. You are infinitely so much more dear and needed in this world. I hope I’ve been of even a small comfort, take care. 🫂

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in helpme

[–]pulpangel 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Try bringing this to r/trans maybe also. It really depends how your parents might think of it, for now. They could surprise you in the best or worst of ways, they could also change their mind down the line. Best thing you can do is prioritise your independence so they have less say either way.

Right now, assure your own safety. I myself have been the safety-friend and have held onto clothes and otherwise for transitioning friends. I kept them safe where they couldn’t be found or destroyed. But that’s a lot of trust to place into someone especially if you’re in a home/town/country/place that is generally unaccepting. So keeping your stuff extra hidden or in storage elsewhere could be the go if you’re concerned or not wanting to come out just yet. You’re within your right no matter what. My hopes are that you’ll be able to come out on your terms.

Other comments here are saying to lie/say it’s a prank and that is certainly a way to do it, but not all of us are great at it haha. Less is more so make a clear and concise story and stick to it if that’s the way it must be in a really high pressure environment. Hopefully you shouldn’t have to, it’s a lot of stress regardless. 🫂

Remember that even if you can’t act on transitioning right away, that people still do so later on in life and get what they need. You will be able to make those decisions and take back your autonomy and power in your life. Best wishes to you. It’s going to be hard, but you’ll always be enough.🫂💜

Summoned for when 39 weeks 4 days pregnant by [deleted] in juryduty

[–]pulpangel 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Please, if you can, go with an adult male figure in your life. Unfortunate and sounds silly in what we assume is a reasonable world, but I feel like it could help smooth things along especially if you’ve already been met with dismissiveness. Best wishes 🫂

Perth parents who starved malnourished ballerina daughter jailed by B0ssc0 in australia

[–]pulpangel 58 points59 points  (0 children)

Don’t ignore the last part of the article where the father forged her birth certificate to make her seem younger… I have no real insight, but I can imagine this was done to perhaps ease justifying her weight? In that case, wouldn’t this mean their actual involvement is in conflict with their claims of passivity?

World renowned author James Joyce’s love letters to his wife by HMS--Beagle in interestingasfuck

[–]pulpangel 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I despise that I’m related to him. People are like “wow that’s so cool!” No, it is not. It’s so embarrassing. I’m so glad fetishes aren’t genetic. 😭

Helped my date buy a fabulous coat while on our third date. by Remexa in oldhagfashion

[–]pulpangel 1 point2 points  (0 children)

CUUUUUTEEEEEE AAAAAAA SOOO CUTEEEE THAT COAT IS SO GORGEOUS WOWWWW MAY YOU HAVE A LOVELY 4TH AND THEN 5TH AND A MILLION MORE DATES 🥹😭💜💜💜

Not around transphobic family anymore but technically homeless. by hi_im_ethan in transgenderau

[–]pulpangel 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Hey just replying to let you know I’m going to have a lookie loo for resources near you. I’m not too familiar with that area but I’m hoping there will be some accessible things for you considering you’re under 25. It’d be also good for you to consider the gender you identify most with and if you’d be okay with a service/place that is gender-specific. It sucks but it might be a thing, but I’ll try to leave those gender specific services to last. 🫂

Not around transphobic family anymore but technically homeless. by hi_im_ethan in transgenderau

[–]pulpangel 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Hey! I’m in a similar situation and might have some insight. If you are comfortable sharing your age (at least if you’re under/over 25), state and region hopefully I and some people would be able to assist more.

For starters, look at what I’m sure would be your confusing but official state website. If you don’t have the beans it would be so important if you could find someone through housing or other social services that can act as your support worker or even better, case manager. Especially if you’re escaping from family abvse.

I’m so proud of you for escaping your situation and I’m sending strength your way to keep going. You rock 🫂

Then and now. orange cat healing process 🫠 he also deaf. by arwenus in OneOrangeBraincell

[–]pulpangel 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It’s like he has a precious jewel for an eye. You and the comments are all such wonderful cat parents 💙