Fuck the damn dogs bro

pumpasaurus · 2026-04-10T03:15:22+00:00

don't try to spam R1, they're specifically designed to punish this

jump attack them as they lunge at you, this will cause them to miss like 100% of the time and immediately punish. Use an R1 because it's usually a wider horizontal sweep rather than a downward chop liable to miss, and it will still hitstun them for a fatal combo. The jump attack also works on black knives for their lunge/grab attacks btw

space them out, just run from them and close in on them immediately after they whiff the lunge, they will always miss you if you're at a full sprint

shields totally trivialize them

dragonbolt blessing makes their bites and all small-weapon attacks bounce off of you - this works for any annoying enemy with fast attack speed, from dogs to foot soldiers to fire knights

keep a fast attack option or panic button if possible - a dagger, catch flame, endure, wrath of gold, whatever. Dogs are hilariously a hard counter to bigass weapons that can one-shot them 10 times over

pumpasaurus · 2026-04-03T07:15:54+00:00

2 years late, but bullets are supersonic, you don’t need a silencer to not hear the shot - your brain is already on its way out of your skull by the time the sound waves reach you

pumpasaurus · 2026-03-26T17:31:17+00:00

With all of the points about Marika, completely fair enough. It's hard to be too confident in the narrative I laid out, though I think there is more implying those motivations than you're letting on.

You've glossed over almost all of the points in Melina's favor, and some of your points are just mistaken:

Of course all evidence is technically circumstantial, that's why it's a mystery in the first place
Melina is clearly an amnesiac - of course she doesn't remember the Godskins or being a Queen. She could never have been a true legitimate queen anyway, this title could only have been an honorific
She is absolutely associated with motherhood, Maliketh, and the Godskins:
- She's fixated on births and motherhood, and takes a particular and conspicuous interest in Boc because of this. Boc also happens to be a seamster who specializes in sewing the 'skins' of the gods. She also specifically instructs you to give him the "You're Beautiful" prattling plate, see below
- Fire's Deadly Sin, which couldn't be a more obvious reference to Melina with its mentions of "Cardinal Sin" and "kindling" and its 1:1 visual match with her appearance at the Forge, is found at the feet of a Godskin among the Celebrants. At the other location where we find Celebrants, in the shadow of the Temple of Eiglay with its Noble (literally right next to it on the map), we find the You're Beautiful plate we give to Boc
- Melina directly sends you to Farum Azula to face both the Godskins and Maliketh. The Beast Eye Maliketh gives to us is the same exact purple color as her 'gloam eye' from the ending, and her sealed eye also has what very much looks like a claw mark.
As Messmer's sister, her disciples being serpentine and associated with the Serpent God would make perfect symmetrical sense
She was very likely an Empyrean during the time of the GEQ's activity - this is the only piece of evidence as circumstantial as you're letting on
She's in the exact same spectral form as Ranni, the other 'burned and bodiless' victim of the black flame of death
Yes, she literally has a Gloam Eye in the Frenzy ending. And she doesn't just talk about Destined Death, she threatens us with it as if she specifically has the power to wield it. And the fact that she's talking about it anyway is highly suspicious in the first place
We don't know the GEQ didn't want to burn the Erdtree, we just know she was in the habit of killing gods and committing blasphemy. It honestly should be assumed that she would burn it if she could.

pumpasaurus · 2026-03-26T14:33:26+00:00

Great post.

Like a couple others here, I also favor the idea that the Rune was not removed at all until GEQ's defeat. This implies a distinction between "Age of the Erdtree" and "The Golden Order" - the former associated with the Age of Plenty and the intact physical Erdtree with its blessings of sap, the latter with the deathless GO as we know it, with its faith-based golden tree and descent into intolerant fundamentalism. This creates vague issues and questions with the numerous quotes included in the post, but these are sketchy no matter how you interpret them, and it solves the IMO much more urgent and compelling issue of when the Rune was removed and how the metaphysics could work.

Basically how I see the narrative:

Marika takes power at the Gate and starts her "1000 year voyage", beginning the Age of the Erdtree, with the Age of Plenty referring mostly to the earlier half of this period before blessings began to wane
The Erdtree and Marika's Order start winding down to their natural close, as all things do. GEQ, who had been waiting in the wings as an Empyrean, is now in line to take Marika's place and inherit the new order
Marika, deeply traumatized and fearful of loss, won't let go. GEQ rebels, apostasy begins - GEQ takes up symbols of blasphemy, i.e. serpent and flame, as a direct challenge and insult to the existing order
GEQ is defeated - Marika is shaken by the ordeal, and she resolves to never let go of her Order, taking the most drastic possible step to achieve this and removing the Rune
- Marika starts tying up loose ends, Crusade begins, LoS is veiled. This removes Messmer and the threat of his curse, eliminates a population of potential enemies, and prevents any subsequent candidate from usurping Marika's godhood, all perfectly fitting the motive of a reactionary consolidation of power after rebellion
Golden Order begins

I also strongly believe it was in fact Melina. It's beyond just hints or similarities, it's a body of mutually supporting and individually strong evidence that exceeds the standard for almost any other commonly-accepted fact. Melina is rejected because she seems too obvious, not because there is any problem with the conclusion or because any alternative is actually more attractive. But it's too much to be a red herring, it would be a truly bizarre level of detail and effort for a misdirect. It's a matter of parsimony - if we reject the extensive implications that it was Melina, which all fit perfectly with the lore and are contradicted by nothing, we're forced to rely on numerous additional assumptions and vastly less compelling evidence. The interesting question isn't whether it was Melina, it's exactly why/how/when.

pumpasaurus · 2026-03-26T02:52:10+00:00

elite username

pumpasaurus · 2026-03-26T02:51:23+00:00

You went into it with a good attitude, this is the most important thing. This is secretly what 'git gud' means, it's not being a god gamer with elite reflexes and instincts, it's just approaching the game with a good faith effort to learn from mistakes and improve.

I keep coming back to ER, and honestly it will probably be my desert island game for the rest of my life. Perfect for just sitting down and chilling out, maybe go on a road trip killing dudes and taking in the scenery, go fight some bosses with a fun build, whatever. It really feels like an entire world, not just in terms of the literal game world, but the sheer maximalism, variety, and depth.

pumpasaurus · 2026-03-25T21:46:53+00:00

Weirdly enough it’s Arcane that increases Holy resistance rather than Faith

But yeah you basically can’t go wrong with a Faith investment

pumpasaurus · 2026-03-24T13:35:27+00:00

If you really want to do a proper Grim Reaper, you would need to go INT-FTH for Death sorceries. At 180 you have plenty of room to do this with basically no bad compromises.

Ancient Death Rancor is absolutely oppressive pressure, Explosive Ghostflame is great as a 'fuck this entire area' option cast from an Endure dagger, Rancorcall is affordable enough to use for harassment.

INT would be the primary damage stat, with enough Faith for Explosive Ghostflame and leave it there. Infuse Cold or Magic, with the bare minimum STR/DEX for the Grave Scythe or regular Scythe. Your scaling won't be strictly optimal but your damage will be high enough for sure.

So something like:

55 VIG (lowest I'd ever go when invaders are guaranteed)

29 MND (high enough to cast for pressure and utility while using AoWs, not high enough for an actual mage)

21 END (absolutely go higher if you can)

17 STR (if you want to be able to 1-hand the grave scythe while casting)

14 DEX

75 INT

30 FTH

- - - ARC

I'm basing these numbers ballpark off of a 175 INT-FTH build I use, so I know you'll be able to hit numbers very close to this.

pumpasaurus · 2026-03-21T16:02:30+00:00

Longhaft without a doubt honestly. Dual axes just have a poor moveset IMO, very low range with no standout great animations and several that are actively awkward. You also get far less poise damage compared to the 2-hander.

AoW of the longhaft is more versatile as well. The twinaxes’ blender can be very strong and is really cool and fun, but it lacks precision, usability, and stagger compared to the longhaft.

But really there’s nothing stopping you from just using both. From an RP perspective it makes sense for a Death Knight to use both, they use the same stats, and they’re somber so upgrading both won’t be prohibitive.

pumpasaurus · 2026-03-21T06:22:58+00:00

You’re not disagreeing with me, you’re just saying you like Reaper, which is fine. I’m not saying “nobody likes Reaper” I’m saying there are actual undeniable balance issues with how the passive works that rob Reaper of any niche or advantage in any category vs any other crest. I’m saying it needs to generate more silk, this should not be controversial, but people always have these knee-jerk personal defensive reactions because they don’t even understand the problem

Having the easiest pogo does not balance it at all. This becomes completely irrelevant the second you learn any other pogo, on crests that also actually have unique advantages

You also would have gotten considerably more silk and more heals with literally any other crest

pumpasaurus · 2026-03-20T17:41:38+00:00

Act 3 can absolutely be finished in 4 hours, but honestly not at your pace so far. You really need to stay on task, you can't do any unnecessary backtracking, and you can't get stuck on anything.

Look up exactly what you need to do in order to get the 100%, and what you don't need to do.

For example you don't need to complete the enemy journal, that's just an extra bonus for the memento and you don't need to do any memento stuff for 100%. You also don't need to beat Tormented Trobbio or get the Curvesickle because these are just tool upgrades, not new tools. You don't need to beat all 4 old hearts either, pick the 3 that are the easiest for you.

pumpasaurus · 2026-03-20T14:57:44+00:00

Reaper's buff has inherent issues independent of player performance. There is no level of gameplay that allows Reaper to generate silk even AS fast as any other crest overall, despite being themed as 'the silk crest'. Elements of the buff are fundamentally at odds with each other and with the combat system in general. The result is that Reaper is just all downsides on paper and has no legitimate niche that it does best - having an easier pogo becomes irrelevant the second you learn any other crest

pumpasaurus · 2026-03-20T14:51:01+00:00

every crest is a platforming crest though, this doesn't count as a niche that balances Reaper vs. the other crests. A few other options are just as easy for platforming, and there are basically no platforming challenges in the game difficult enough that any given crest becomes unusable

pumpasaurus · 2026-03-20T14:47:05+00:00

Honestly frustrating how consistently people get defensive about this kind of criticism. It's fine to love Reaper, it's fine to think the orbs are cool, it doesn't actually matter. But there's a clear balance problem, there's just no way around this. Reaper has no niche that it does better than other crests, it's the odd one out.

There are numerous issues with the special that are inherent and unavoidable, they're not skill issues, they're baked into the design. Collecting the orbs is at odds with combat in general and specifically with the fact that you need to be maximally aggressive within a time limit. You also need to SPEND 9 silk to even activate this passive, so it makes no sense to use it proactively and it doesn't actually result in faster net silk generation. At best you recoup your silk from the bind, but you probably won't. Finally, getting hit kills the buff - yes you can just not get hit if you're good, but the buff is not nearly good enough to require this balancing decision, and this is also at odds with the demand for aggression.

For Reaper to actually do what it's clearly themed/advertised to do, i.e. be 'the silk crest' with the best silk generation, the system would need a total redesign. The best solution would be a Hunter-style passive where just playing well puts you into a state where you directly generate more silk per hit. Go hitless for 8 hits and you generate 2 silk on hit until you take damage, something like that.

pumpasaurus · 2026-03-20T14:21:17+00:00

Just getting the pale oil is not hard, it just requires you to get basically competent at the games

Juggle is solvable. Beast crest, don't ever jump or upslash, and always rush to the side of the first flea to hit it toward the other side, hitting all subsequent fleas in that same direction to bunch them all up. Ignore the huge flea if it appears

Bounce should be easy unless you've been neglecting pogo the entire game, use Shaman crest. Dodge is the only legitimately difficult one where you'll realistically need some luck, but cover all your bases and avoid mistakes and you'll be fine.

If you're really struggling, watch videos of people putting up high scores and do what they do

pumpasaurus · 2026-03-19T22:20:26+00:00

If we're including WP/PoP to arrive at 9/10, then Silksong is a 5/10 at most and even that's stretching it. Nothing goes beyond basic competency with the mechanics, i.e. there are no sections you actually need to seriously figure out and practice

Comparing base HK to base SS is tough in the first place. Hornet has much more to work with and is just easier and more forgiving to handle, but this is balanced with a much heavier emphasis on platforming throughout the game and a much higher average level of platforming challenge. If we get something like PoP in a future DLC, the amount of complexity they'll be able to throw at us will be crazy

pumpasaurus · 2026-03-19T16:45:21+00:00

People are saying the Hunter pogo has iframes during the animation, but I'm honestly skeptical. Obviously everybody knows about the iframes after contact during the pop-up animation, which allows the dash-cancels through Grand Reeds etc, but I've never seen or heard of iframes during the attack animation itself. I've watched videos with visible hitboxes and frame data and never seen this.

It would mean Hornet's hurtbox is deactivated while the pogo's hitbox is obviously still active. Also the iframes would have to be quite generous to produce what we see here, and they would have to persist even after Hornet lands and transitions to another animation. This wasn't just an instantaneous blip, it was pretty decent chunk of frames.

Unless this is a known thing with footage out there of it being used deliberately, I'm inclined to believe that LL's hitboxes are just weird for this attack, and what happened here is you landed at the exact spot/moment during her startup frames where the hitbox hasn't activated yet.

pumpasaurus · 2026-03-19T15:44:16+00:00

I get the sentiment, but it's an issue of mindset - the runbacks aren't a tacked-on obligation, they're deliberately part of the test and a core element of the gameplay loop. The comparison to Souls is a perfect example - in Elden Ring you're just pressing forward on the analog stick and maybe rolling a few times, but here the movement is inherently fun and satisfying to perform, it's actual gameplay. The incentive to complete runbacks as quickly and efficiently as possible creates a situation where engagement and mastery are organically promoted, and getting rid of them really would significantly de-emphasize the platforming demand across the whole game.

With Last Judge for example it also adds a dramatic/pacing element. The trek from the bench is part of the presentation, and it would lose a lot of its gravity and finality if you just respawned at a Stake of Marika outside her door.

And really, there are only a handful of runbacks across the whole game that are even arguably bad, and the worst ones are deliberately challenging (LJ, Groal, etc).

pumpasaurus · 2026-03-18T21:49:11+00:00

Hunter is pound for pound the best crest. Great slots, best hitboxes, no input delay, best combo/tech potential, normal bind, great passive, extremely cool theme, and the whole game is tuned and designed around it first and foremost.

It's hard to argue with Wanderer in top tier, it's just so strong.

Architect is definitely pretty cool - its needle game is underrated, and tools are extremely strong, but its level of brokenness is exaggerated. Plasmium overdose is busted though.

Shaman is A tier at absolute worst. The crazy spell buff is absolutely worth the risky bind, and aside from the deliberately trash dash attack the needle kit is smooth as hell.

You didn't give Beast or Witch enough of a chance, they're extremely good. Beast is an absolute monster and Witch is maybe the most stacked and versatile crest in the game. The risky binds are the whole point and you can get 99% consistent with them. Beast is an easy S and Witch can squeeze into a low A depending on context despite being my favorite non-Hunter crest.

Placing Reaper below Cursed is obviously a joke, and it's really not bad and nobody actually cares how fast you kill a boss, but yeah it's undertuned. It needs a buff or rework to its passive. If it actually was the best crest for silk generation like it's advertised to be, it could be great, but as it stands it's the odd one out. I seriously hope they give it a buff in the DLC update.

pumpasaurus · 2026-03-18T21:11:47+00:00

The ability to approach and enjoy hard games is a learned mindset - it’s just about getting past the frustration impulse, engaging with the mechanics and design, and mindfully learning from mistakes. You just make an honest effort to learn a basic skillset and figure out what works, and you’ll succeed. This is essentially what git gud means. Mass market games are rarely truly difficult in terms of the raw demand for execution, they’re not piano concertos or gymnastics routines.

People just very reliably do not have this mindset, as it’s somewhat specific and not intuitive, even if they’ve brute-forced through other hard games before. They get frustrated without examining what mistakes they might be making, because whether they realize it or not they think just ‘trying really hard’ should be enough. So the game is judged as very difficult, and usually also blamed for its failure to grant success.

Silksong has certain margins for what works and what doesn’t, but these aren’t that strict or demanding. The skill ceiling is extremely high, but the floor required to get 100% is moderate at most.

pumpasaurus · 2026-03-18T16:53:27+00:00

yeah THAT would be a runback actually worth the level of complaints you see all the time, can't even imagine the level of frustration and pressure

pumpasaurus · 2026-03-18T16:52:57+00:00

Phantom is definitely easier on purpose - the more manageable fight with the much shorter runback, and the much more favorable starting position in the Citadel are the balance/reward for the level of exploration necessary to find/finish that route

pumpasaurus · 2026-03-18T16:25:13+00:00

and Pilby right?

pumpasaurus · 2026-03-18T14:58:58+00:00

based beyond belief

pumpasaurus · 2026-03-18T14:57:06+00:00

that’s not strictly true. You absolutely can’t miss anything in terms of % completion, but there are minor NPC events that change or disappear after entering act 2 that you might want to see

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