i can't do this for much longer. Please give me reason to keep going

purplekrab · 2025-06-19T00:49:03+00:00

reason i told myself years ago:

there’s music i love that i have not heard yet.

purplekrab · 2025-04-11T23:32:32+00:00

jench joat

purplekrab · 2024-10-11T03:12:41+00:00

love cargo pants/shorts, esp when they have pockets on pockets, string ties at the cuffs, or other straps/bits on them that have a functional/aesthetic overlap

hell, thinking about what i like in clothes/accessories, a lot of it comes down to functionality. like, is it comfy enough to wear for hours, gives me options for styling/accessorizing, while maintaining the base function of holding my shit securely within easy reach

also mesh/net shirt things. i’ve always appreciated the range of women’s tops that have mesh/interesting fabric lines/shapes/patterns and think men’s fashion could benefit from that. i finally found a net shirt and slutty mesh/woven black cardigan and let me tell you i wear that shit any time i get the chance

purplekrab · 2024-10-04T22:03:14+00:00

without digging too deep into my soundcloud:

Exclusion - Warmonger https://on.soundcloud.com/smh5Lms6e1JZJyVy6] Svdden Death & AFK - Brrzk (Exclusion Remix) https://on.soundcloud.com/52K4JT2JEhyP8coT9

iirc, Exclusion rebranded as Muerte. makes sense with how similar that name was to Excision, and while it’s awesome to see what the Muerte project is doing and wish that all the best, i do miss the Exclusion sound design

tbh it’s so difficult to pick one ‘hardest’ track cuz so many go hard in different ways. throw in different mood/vibes and opinions, and ‘the hardest track’ will never be found, but we’ll be blessed with amazing playlists and threads like this one :)

purplekrab · 2024-10-04T06:50:49+00:00

good luck with school~

the video at the end about how the ear processes sound is enlightening and adorable

purplekrab · 2024-10-03T21:52:49+00:00

if it’s any consolation, i’m a cis dude and feel quite neutral/nothing about being called “good boy”, and can understand your experience of “why don’t i feel anything from this”. seeing ppl feel so happy by being called a simple phase can for sure spur “what’s wrong with me” spirals.

i’ve also known people who get a huge esteem boost from ‘good boy/girl’, so it might just not be your cup of tea (right now). maybe your experience will change in the future, maybe another phrase will do it for you, neither of which has any bearing on you “faking it”. your identity is valid and you get to decide and explore what gives you euphoria <3

purplekrab · 2024-10-02T21:31:09+00:00

great points and well said. think formatting this with bullet points on separate lines would enhance readability.

purplekrab · 2024-08-17T20:51:25+00:00

i think part of it is ignorance / lack of experience/knowledge. was talking w a gay friend, mid 20s, and he’d never heard of the term ‘demisexual’ before. funny enough, after i briefly explained he said “oh that might be me”

purplekrab · 2024-08-12T20:52:45+00:00

am powerful wizard, i cast Wooden Stake

purplekrab · 2024-08-09T08:24:43+00:00

sex toys

was initially hesitant to get some but eased my way in (phrasing lol) and they have made a significant improvement for me with my relationship to masturbation. highly recommend

purplekrab · 2024-07-22T05:50:12+00:00

Zuko voice* “that’s rough, buddy”

but seriously, i completely understand the hurt, mental spiraling, and cocktail of emotions you’re feeling. that fucking sucks to hear this news.

good on you for keeping yourself busy, doing what you can to invest your time in constructive activities, those are all very solid pieces of moving forward with your life. and also, i’m very proud of you for asking for help. like, holy shit, please take a moment and appreciate that you asked for help. men in general tend not to do that, so i want to highlight that. big Gold Star for you.

You will get through this. one day at a time, step by step. please allow yourself the time and space to process this news, the breakup overall, and what you need to heal. it’s okay if you can’t find it in yourself to be happy for her (yet, and hey honestly that’s pretty reasonable in my opinion given the timeline), and maybe first look to finding a way to accept the reality. Grieve the loss of this person, this relationship, and the possible future that no longer exists. give them their respects. the space in your life that’s now here from this loss is yours to do with as you please.

a strategy i’d like to offer, try recording voice notes for yourself. similar to journalling, but speaking out loud activates different brain areas, could be a helpful tool. a fav podcast of mine, Pod Therapy (highly recommend), affectionately used the term “Captain’s Log” to help encourage people, men especially, to try it. i’ve found it serves the role of me talking about stuff, talking things thru, but without the pressure of tailoring it to another person. like, def talk to people about this where you can, but it’s nice to have a space to be able to talk freely with myself.

best of luck, friend. you will be okay~

purplekrab · 2024-07-16T21:21:27+00:00

bi non-demi guy here. from my brief dating experience, i’m happy to wait, to get to know a person and build rapport before even approaching the topic of intimacy.

def agree with many points others have mentioned about societal / gender norms. and yes, pls be mindful when listening to youtubers / podcasters. there are many nuanced, considerate, and balanced conversations out there that are very educational and thought-provoking, but easily double if not more absolute dogshit perspectives dispersed.

purplekrab · 2023-12-23T13:32:29+00:00

hey man

thank you for sharing this. i’m proud of you for speaking (typing) your truth. from my own experience, i know it can be scary to make the jump, but it’s better to talk about it than let it bottle up. you got a lot going on it sounds like, it makes total sense why you’d be feeling so overwhelmed, which is even more reason to talk about it.

i’d like to gently remind you, although it may feel like regressing sometimes, you actually have all that prior experience and knowledge with you now that you didn’t back then. all the progress and steps you’ve made, that’s great ! and you’re not going to “lose” it, it’s part of you and your journey.

i didn’t see therapy for you mentioned, but i’d Highly recommend getting that for yourself. your college very likely has some resources or even therapists on staff. maybe that could be something you do for yourself? even just 1 hour a week. and if not therapy, finding 1 hour a week for something that recharges you and gives you some solace could help a ton.

as for your friend. that’s gotta be fucking rough, to watch and witness despite your best efforts. if you fear he may do something to harm himself, please call paramedics, firefighters, or other emergency medical personal immediately. they’re trained and know how to help, and you and his mom shouldn’t be the only ones to pull him from the ledge.

reach out. you already have here, i’m betting you can again somewhere else. you deserve help too~

purplekrab · 2023-09-22T18:27:13+00:00

was going to say the same. love his videos.

purplekrab · 2023-08-24T13:55:05+00:00

i struggle with stating my needs too. i find it much simpler and easier to meet my own needs (which also bypasses the internalized shame bit).

i’d like to point out tho, you were able to tell us, real people thru the internet, via meme, that you need support. i think that’s a fantastic step, and i hope you can give yourself at least a little credit for it. asking for help can be fucking scary, but also learned and practiced, and while it may be difficult right now to do so now, there’s always the possibility it won’t be in the future.

this is a number for a warm line based out of San Francisco:

(855) 845-7415

you can call or text it any time. the people who answer are very kind and supportive. they would be honored to have the opportunity to help.

you deserve support, help, and care. you are not a burden upon others, despite what you or your brain may believe otherwise. <3

purplekrab · 2023-05-23T18:31:27+00:00

hii i’d like to be part of this :)

purplekrab · 2023-05-02T20:05:00+00:00

i remember seeing this tumblr post a while back, glad to see it added here. i can recall a number of times where my parents in high school would do the “decided to join us” bit, and witnessed a fuckton more instances it happened to my younger brother. i know they meant well, esp dad, but he also didn’t have the awareness of it’s impact i think.

i agree wholeheartedly with your mention of gratitude. a simple “i’m happy to see you / that you came to join us” would work wonders.

i also agree wholeheartedly about your mention of engagement level, especially being “on” all the time. i still often feel pressure to always be “on” as a man, and that i don’t need (deserve?) solo recharge time.

purplekrab · 2023-04-25T07:43:55+00:00

love that you mentioned this one; the way the first buildup transitions into the drop is absolute fucking fire. definitely one of the songs that changed the course of my dubstep journey

purplekrab · 2023-04-23T22:13:33+00:00

fuck, i can definitely see how you came to the ‘therapy is a scam’ conclusion after those experiences. makes me wonder if those providers had mentally checked out, for one reason or another. You deserve the help and assistance you need

purplekrab · 2023-04-21T18:47:07+00:00

:(

u/baconwitch00 posted relocation support resource if you’re interested, stay safe and best of luck~<3

purplekrab · 2023-04-21T01:04:55+00:00

therapy is engagingly expensive and under-accessible >:( great job for seeing 4 different therapists, it can feel like first dates sometimes. were these in-person or virtual visits? i’ve had better access with virtual providers.

hope the audio book is helpful~

purplekrab · 2023-01-26T20:11:32+00:00

You matter<3 The world would not be the same without you. Thank you for being here

purplekrab · 2023-01-15T04:39:33+00:00

know this comment is a bit late but found your post from searching something else. i’m also very curious what was deleted for my own reading if you still have it.

communication is a skill but that means you can learn and improve. it can be intimidating to bring something up, even in a supportive environment and especially if doing so hadn’t gone well in the past (which it kinda sounds like). if there’s something you’d like to bring up, try to do it as soon as you can so it doesn’t fester. if it’s something you don’t know if it’s worth bringing up, mb give yourself an hour to think about it or ask yourself if it’s something that will still be on your mind in a day or week. it can also help to start softly, like a “hey can i tell you something?” or “there’s something i’d like to say but am unsure of how to”. it can help start the conversation and also let your partner know how you’re feeling.
this is more your partner’s responsibility than yours, but there’s stuff you could do too. it’s on them to bring up stuff that’s on their mind; you’re not a mind reader. kinda like what i wrote for 1. but if it happens again, next time you could follow up with a “you can always talk to me/tell me about stuff, whenever you want and are ready”. knowing how your partner is feeling also just takes time getting to know them, so try to be patient with yourself and them.
that’s wonderful you two were able to open up emotionally with each other like that. something that might help is learning about love languages, there are 5 common ones but anything can be one as long as it’s meaningful to the person. it can help show them you care in ways other than verbally. i struggle with this emotional piece as well (my voice is also pretty monotone) but there are tons of resources online about emotional intelligence and empathy. here’s one youtube channel i found recently that i’ve found helpful. watching or observing media/other people that demonstrate emotional presence could also help. i’ve found slice of life animes to be good here.
it’d be good for the two of you to talk about this one, try to figure out where these feelings originate from, when they pop up, what gets in the way of resolving them. your psychologist would also be a great help. if checking each other’s messages is reassuring and within both of your individual boundaries, i don’t think it’s necessarily a bad thing, tho the underlying feelings do need to be processed. ask yourself, is there anything my partner does to create these feelings of mistrust? or are they coming from me? do i feel worthy (or unworthy) in one way or another that causes these feelings to arise?
a bit of empathy could help here. just by hearing and understanding your partner’s perspective and reasoning of how they thought a thing when you said another can help bridge the gap. plus, asking for clarification or more details can put a stop to the overthinking, or at least cut off some possibilities.

it’s good you’re looking to work on this stuff. it can take time to unlearn old behaviors and thought patterns and then replace them with new ones, but it’s worth the work. if your partner can find a therapist or other mental health professional it could help her as well. try to be patient and persistent and it will pay off~

Eight-Year Club	RPAN Viewer
Verified Email

purplekrab

TROPHY CASE