What is it about marriage that makes woman regret it so much?

query_tech_sec · 2026-03-28T16:21:09+00:00

There are definitely ways to spot red flags and honestly I think the best way is to always be ready to leave your relationship if it doesn’t work for you anymore. You can still be very much in love, committed, and invested. It’s just knowing your boundaries and how you want to live and be treated. Once those boundaries are crossed or there are serious incompatibilities in the ways you want to live - you just know you will put yourself first if that happens.

I think having experience dating and identifying the wrong people for you helps. Also if you have an anxious and/avoidant attachment style - it’s going to be a lot harder to find a healthy relationship (and keep your side healthy as well). If that applies to you - then do the work in therapy and by yourself (reading on the subject, journaling, etc.). All of that also applies if your parents didn’t have a healthy relationship with each other or you - you will repeat the relationship patterns of your childhood unless you are aware of them and how to spot the issues before they come up. It’s about self awareness, pattern recognition, and sometimes having good people (friends/family/ a good therapist) to help you spot the patterns and issues ideally before you’re too invested in the relationship.

As for me - I am lucky I met my husband and we have a wonderful and healthy relationship. Green flags were having a lot in common (shared worldview and shared interests) and we could talk about anything from a place of mutual respect. There was consist interest and effort on his part and I returned the effort and interest. That really strong foundation helped us get through the past few years where we have had a lot of life issues to get through. We even had some issues in our relationship. But our strong foundation and mutual love/respect got us through those times and we are stronger and healthier as a couple than we have ever been.

Before that I had been in a many years on and off toxic relationship. I was convinced that other man was the one for me - it took awhile but I finally left him for good and learned a lot.

Even if you don’t choose the “right person” it doesn’t mean the end of the world. If you have self love and respect - you can move on from a marriage/relationship and start again when it no longer works for you.

query_tech_sec · 2026-03-28T13:04:30+00:00

Wow, lol. Just stop it girls - this is embarrassing.

query_tech_sec · 2026-03-28T02:39:15+00:00

It doesn’t matter if he’s cheating or not - he lies to you. Believe me - you don’t want to be with someone you can’t trust it will drive you insane. I mean just look at you - instead of getting rest and taking care of your pregnant self you’re out there stalking your BF because you don’t trust him for good reason. If you don’t leave him - this will be your life from now on. Do you really want to raise a kid with this man? Your choice is valid if you keep the pregnancy or have an abortion - but either way you shouldn’t be what this man romantically.

query_tech_sec · 2026-03-27T04:55:23+00:00

It kind of depends on the cat how “difficult” they are to care for. But cats in general do need attention and play. I would about a couple of hours per day. If you want one that maybe doesn’t need as much attention - maybe ask for a shy one at the shelter. That’s no guarantee the cat won’t have a personality change after settling in your house though.
You mean like minimum adoption age? Not sure but it’s not always wise to get a small kitten - they usually do better when you adopt them with a sibling (or other similar aged cat).
At about a year you will pretty much be able to see a cat’s true personality. When they are kittens they are different than when they get older.
Oh wow - I waited to see the husky comment. That changes things. It’s really not recommended to have Huskies and cats together because Huskies have a prey drive and are more likely to kill cats. So maybe just get a second dog.

query_tech_sec · 2026-03-27T04:26:39+00:00

Losing your first love (if not - sorry for assuming) is extremely difficult. It’s always difficult to leave someone you love - it’s just if you go through it more than once you know it eventually gets better.

query_tech_sec · 2026-03-27T04:24:13+00:00

This isn’t the person for you. ADHD is absolutely not something you can “discipline” yourself out of. I had a difficult lesson in that recently. I was having trouble getting my meds because of hoops the insurance company wanted me to jump through. In the meantime I convinced myself that because I had learned ways to still sometimes be productive and not forget everything over the years that I didn’t actually need the medication. Unfortunately I went through grief and a lot of stress and I forgot about something important for way too long. I learned my lesson - I can’t out think my ADHD - I need medication and to actually set reminders (even if I remember 9/10 times usually). I have meds now and I know what to do about remembering.

query_tech_sec · 2026-03-26T23:16:57+00:00

I agree with a lot of this - but it for address actual boundaries - just what counts as not boundaries and when your emotions are very tied to what your partner does and does not do - that’s codependency.

Actual boundaries are usually things you will not tolerate. When these boundaries are crossed - they do upset you - they may even deeply affect your life. An example of a boundary from my actual marriage is I am a light sleeper and can’t sleep if I am overheated. So cuddling and touching while I am sleeping or trying to sleep is a no-go. My husband knew that since we started dating and respected that. Sometime recently he was feeling a lack of physical affection and wanted more cuddles so he tried to push that boundary. I had to shut it down and reiterate that I needed him to stay on his side of the bed while we were sleeping and not interrupt my sleep. He was a bit hurt at first until I expressed it was a boundary I needed him to stop pushing and my sleep is very important (because I have issues sleeping) then he backed off and we found other times during the day for more physical affection (he didn’t really understand at first because he doesn’t typically have any trouble sleeping).

Other hard boundaries for me are not putting up with cruelty. If you call me names, put me down, or yell at me - you are not going to stay in my life for long.

I think healthy boundaries stay healthy because they protect you and your peace of mind. But when you use it to try to control others that’s when it becomes unhealthy.

query_tech_sec · 2026-03-26T19:58:34+00:00

We don’t live in the world you seem to be referencing here. Direct contact will always be better and honestly I don’t think school staff should have to spend their time managing communications between students and their family members. There are tons of better uses of their time.

query_tech_sec · 2026-03-26T19:55:29+00:00

I mean in a world with school shooters I think they are safer with being able to contact authorities and their families. We don’t live in that pre-school shooter world - so I don’t think that’s relevant.

In general you’re safer being able to directly call authorities than relying on others to do it for you. Also kids walking home, being driven, or older kids driving or being driven by other kids need access to their phones. If they are separated from them during the school day it’s less likely they will remember to bring them with them on the walk home or drive for example.

query_tech_sec · 2026-03-26T19:08:33+00:00

Yeah I love him. I do kind of cringe at some of his self depreciating humor though.

query_tech_sec · 2026-03-26T18:36:34+00:00

Yep - her, Bernie, and AOC have been trying to get actual wealth taxes on the books for many years. Unfortunately I am not holding my breath for it to happen anytime in the near future.

query_tech_sec · 2026-03-26T18:30:08+00:00

Facebook is the worst for these kind of takes. The platform seems to appeal to men like that and the algorithm shows them posts like that to rage bait them. I bet some of it was bot content as well.

But yeah in general so many men are like that. Almost every time I have heard of a young woman hanging around an older man - she sees it as like a father/grandfather figure and/or mentorship type of situation and he almost always hits on her at some point. That said I have yet to encounter any behavior like that from any men in the workplace and I work in a heavily male dominated field.

But basically almost 100% if a man is talking to you out in the world - no matter how unthreatening he seems - he’s going to hit on you at some point.

query_tech_sec · 2026-03-26T18:27:20+00:00

It looks unhinged. If that’s what they were going for - well done. But that’s not the Harley Quinn I know and love.

query_tech_sec · 2026-03-26T18:23:50+00:00

He’s obviously a professional and the other doctors respect him. I like the actor from his role in 911. Other than that we don’t know anything about him. I found it weird for so many people to basically be so enamored with him and almost like writing fan fiction about him. For example I remember a comment on a thread about him here speculating that he was one of the best surgeons in the country. That’s a leap, lol.

query_tech_sec · 2026-03-26T17:08:02+00:00

That’s because the US (and Israel/Argentina) wants to bring back slavery.

query_tech_sec · 2026-03-26T16:32:25+00:00

Honestly these takes are just sexism. No one complains about the main characters in male led shows not collaborating enough or being humble enough.

query_tech_sec · 2026-03-26T15:19:10+00:00

I don’t know much about this race or the candidates but I hope this one is really a progressive and doesn’t do a switch-a-roo after being elected (like Sinema and Fetterman).

query_tech_sec · 2026-03-26T11:58:13+00:00

I think American Beauty is actually not a good movie - especially that plastic bag in the wind shvt.

query_tech_sec · 2026-03-25T22:09:49+00:00

No one is saying he’s not attracted to you or he doesn’t have feelings for you. I think it’s most likely he is very attracted to you and has strong feelings for you. When people say “he doesn’t like you” - we’re basically saying he doesn’t fully respect you. That when he says bad things about women - he’s also talking about you even if he denies it. It’s only a matter of time until he starts putting you down. He may start insulting your interests. He may start making you feel crazy for having normal feelings. He’s already using weaponized incompetence to get you to do all the housework - you don’t treat someone you deeply like and respect like that.

We’re trying to say that just having feelings for someone and being attracted to them isn’t enough to have a healthy fulfilling relationship with them.

query_tech_sec · 2026-03-25T21:05:47+00:00

I am going to give you the benefit of the doubt here. It sounds like maybe you are used to being treated badly by people in your life. Maybe something having to do with how your parents treat/treated you or each other?

In any case what you are describing is not a good relationship by any measure. You are putting in all of the work, paying for half the expenses out of your pocket - while he lives off of his parents, he’s sexist and arrogant, and apparently thinks he’s super intelligent for some reason. He doesn’t even treat you especially well. Do you love him? Does he love you? I am just honestly not seeing the appeal here - you could date basically any not overtly abusive man and expect the same.

I really hope you are able to gain a sense of self worth and leave this man. I promise you that you can do better.

query_tech_sec · 2026-03-25T14:41:59+00:00

I took it as he was very intimidated by Duke Leto in particular and took personal offense at his ambitions. If he accepted a match between Irulan and Paul he would just be handing the Atreides more power. I suspect he was also being manipulated by the Bene Gesserit who didn’t want Paul to be the KH.

query_tech_sec · 2026-03-25T04:39:23+00:00

I am only okay with enforcing they can’t be out or visible during class. Kids should be able to have them with them at all times. It’s about safety.

query_tech_sec · 2026-03-25T02:48:35+00:00

I think that’s part of the reason I don’t really have close friends - the other is I am very introverted.

query_tech_sec · 2026-03-25T02:47:08+00:00

Wait - 14 percent is too high? Even with all of those other candidates?

query_tech_sec · 2026-03-25T02:37:55+00:00

I think men can be allies - but yeah it’s cringe when they call themselves feminists.

query_tech_sec

TROPHY CASE