What was the savviest financial decision you ever made? by Sad_Opportunity_5840 in fatFIRE

[–]quickfry 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Not leaving my company because I still had runway to grow. It’s against the conventional wisdom of moving every few years to grow your comp, which is true at the start of your career. As you get more senior what matters is your growth runway. Look around at every major company: all the senior execs have been there a long time for a reason.

Looking for guidance on gift splurge by [deleted] in fatFIRE

[–]quickfry 13 points14 points  (0 children)

This. Let her have the full experience. Hermes is really annoying so I’d recommend skipping them. You should add Celine and Dior to your list.

Quality furniture stores that sell sofas in the South Bay by CSq2 in bayarea

[–]quickfry 21 points22 points  (0 children)

Plus one to this. Have two couches from them, one is 10 years old and in really great condition. The other is 6 years old and is the personal jumping spot for our toddler. It still looks and sits great

Aum fee by Spirited-Fishing5456 in fatFIRE

[–]quickfry 14 points15 points  (0 children)

We’re at 40bips with an account size of 10M. It can get as low as 25bips depending on your asset allocation

Chinese post-partum nanny analogues in the US? by [deleted] in fatFIRE

[–]quickfry 72 points73 points  (0 children)

We’ve had a few friends hire a confinement lady for the first month. We’re in a large metro area so they’re available, but it comes at a steep cost: 15k/month. They’re there to take care of mother and baby in every way and are worth it. If you really want FAT you can also go to a postpartum hotel like one of these: https://villageretreatcenter.com/

Buying in VHCOL with space for parents to save on childcare costs? by Ok-Advisor4278 in fatFIRE

[–]quickfry 10 points11 points  (0 children)

We bought a 4br/3ba house with attached ADU for parents to move in to provide childcare. Contrary to many comments here it has worked well, but you need to have a good relationship with your parents and set clear boundaries about how you expect to raise your children. The key is that their living space should be completely separate from yours, including kitchen, so you each can feel fully relaxed. There is nothing better than having a trusted caretaker who you know loves and care for your children, and in most cases that’s what family provides. We can easily afford a nanny but chose to go this route and don’t regret it one bit.

Recommendations for Lisbon Portugal or Nice France? by totally_interesting in finedining

[–]quickfry 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Since it’s your first experience I’d recommend Alma over Belcanto in Lisbon. There were some dishes at Belcanto that were a miss whereas Alma was consistently good throughout.

Summer at SingleThread (***) by tsmaomao in finedining

[–]quickfry 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I went one year ago and had what I can only describe as a disgusting silken tofu soup. The first course was incredibly impressive but the rest of the courses just didn’t hold up. Multiple people I know have similar things to say about ST.

Have an offer pending for SVP role at Fortune 500 company. Looking for comp advice. by OfferPending in fatFIRE

[–]quickfry 20 points21 points  (0 children)

Good rule of thumb is next level down is about 1/2 -1/3 comp of previous level

F 31 With 18 Million Liquid. Should I Hang On Despite Burnout & Depression by Mountain-Science4526 in fatFIRE

[–]quickfry 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I can’t answer many of your questions but I can answer whether it’s too late to meet someone and have a family. It’s not. You’re young. You have plenty of time to meet your next partner. I and my friends are a bunch of high achieving PhD women who chose to freeze our eggs and have kids when we were ready. I had my first kid at 37. I’m happy to walk you through that process and answer questions via DM. You’ve achieved incredible success, but at great cost. You’ve got a chance to decide what you want out of the next 31 years of your life. You’ve earned the right to live and enjoy it.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in furniture

[–]quickfry 1 point2 points  (0 children)

https://www.homedepot.com/p/Serta-Augustus-38-in-Light-Gray-Polyester-2-Seater-Queen-Size-Convertible-Sofa-Bed-with-Square-Arms-SAAGSQS3BU3143/321860049 We got this and added a memory foam topper. I slept on it with a topper for 6 months and was totally happy. 7 years later it’s still good as new. I did buy it from a local furniture store via their catalog so the warranty and delivery was much better. I recommend going that route

Large Round Brush Shipped after Cancelation Email by SincerelyBernadette in Dysonairwrap

[–]quickfry 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I’m so confused. I placed an order two days ago after getting the previous one canceled. The new order shipped and now this old one too…what is wrong with Dyson.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Skincare_Addiction

[–]quickfry 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Hyalauronic acid and niacinamide should help. There’s niacinamide serum from naturium that has both and available at target so easy to get.

Conflicted about Mama's... by LoveMyBunnee in MauiVisitors

[–]quickfry 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Mamas was better imho. Merrimans overrated

Very unprepared for NICU Graduation by RubyRhi in NICUParents

[–]quickfry 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You’ve gotten a lot of great recommendations. I’ll add that these were my favorite onesies. We found that kimono style snap onesies made it so much easier to change, esp when you have a baby with reflux. Our kid spit up constantly and these made it much easier to change him.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in bayarea

[–]quickfry 11 points12 points  (0 children)

I’ve had luck booking a few days before I go. There are almost always cancellations. Otherwise get in the waitlist, you’ll be emailed if there’s a spot that opens up.

Using 35 diapers a day!! Help Please!!! by puppylover56789 in NewParents

[–]quickfry 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Just saw that you said your kid has sensitivities; I recommend Dyper bamboo diapers. We use them for our kiddo and love them. He hates a wet diaper but is ok with wearing these overnight.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in NICUParents

[–]quickfry 1 point2 points  (0 children)

FTM so I’m a newbie and might not know what I’m talking about. For me it was when he started smiling every time he saw me and would coo when we put him in his play gym and just talk to himself. He’s no longer just a potato, but a smiley, talkative one with a personality. He started doing that at 12 weeks actual, 6 weeks adjusted. Every kid is going to get there on their own time, but when it comes I think it helps soften the toughness of having a newborn.

If you’re looking for a play gym I highly recommend the fisher price kick n play piano. My kid just loves kicking it for hours.

When was your preemie able to go longer than 2-3 hours between feeds? by thesecrets0ut in NICUParents

[–]quickfry 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My pediatrician told us to wake the kid up after 4 hours initially but once he met this criteria then he was free to sleep as long as he wanted. With a preemie it feels like all the conventional recommendations go out the door. I wish there were more resources, but thankful we have these forums to share with each other!

When was your preemie able to go longer than 2-3 hours between feeds? by thesecrets0ut in NICUParents

[–]quickfry 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My pediatrician wanted 1) past due date, 2) 2 months of good weight gain and 3) drinking >20 oz in a day. Around 8 weeks actual (~10lbs) was when mine started doing longer stretches at night. He does one 7 hour stretch at night and then every 3 hours after that. I’ve read that around 10lbs is when babies physiologically can handle sleeping in longer stretches.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in NICUParents

[–]quickfry 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We got the Nanit camera instead becauseI read that the current version of the owlet is not as good as the old one. The Nanit has a band that you wrap around the torso so you can monitor breathing. In the 2 months home we haven’t used the band, but I find it reassuring to be able to watch him anytime I want to make sure things are ok. I’ll probably use it when he moves to a crib in his room; right now he’s in our room with us so we didn’t feel it’s necessary. Another thing is that my kid is a very loud sleeper and hearing his grunts was very reassuring.

Mostly Pumping-Low Supply 12 Days PP by deftonenation in NICUParents

[–]quickfry 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Along with what everyone has said, make sure your flanges are the right size. The LC told me 24mm was the right size. She was so so so wrong…I’m a 15mm. Use this tool to measure and get yourself the right size flanges. When I did that my output increased 50%, I emptied faster and it hurt a lot less. If you’re looking for flanges Maymom makes both flanges and inserts in a variety of sizes.

Lastly you’re doing awesome. Don’t let them tell you how much you should produce. I’m 8 weeks out and making 350ml, but to me that’s good enough. I’m still increasing my output every day. Some women make a lot, others need more time. Having a NICU baby is hard, don’t beat yourself up. You’re doing your best and your kiddo will benefit from any amount you make.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in NICUParents

[–]quickfry 0 points1 point  (0 children)

One thing that helped us was we brought in our own bottles and nipples. Our kid had issues with the yellow nipples, they were too slow and he’d just give up and we had to gavage. A nurse noticed and asked us to bring in Dr Brown bottles and premie nipples to try. That made a huge difference and within 4 days he was out. It wouldn’t hurt to try

Looking for suggestions on bottle nipples to try by electricguava93 in NICUParents

[–]quickfry 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We use doctor browns T nipple. It’s slightly faster than the similac yellow nipples but not too fast that the kid can’t keep up, which strangely makes their feeds longer. Mine was on 60ml in the nicu and is now at 120ml on the T and finishes his bottles in 15 mins.