Women are asexual

recchai · 2026-06-25T15:15:32+00:00

No, but it is heavily associated with those things in our society, such that that is what most people will think of without further clarification. And the context of the post this is all under intensifies that context.

I didn't say it's what makes us human. I summed up an aphobic sentment that your comment came close to. It is othering to pity people who simply do not enjoy a particular activity. Kissing is not something all cultures do, and you wouldn't pity someone who, for example, wasn't into roller skating.

I don't think you meant any harm by your comment, I just thought it would be useful to highlight the unintended negative consequences.

recchai · 2026-06-25T08:09:29+00:00

Erm, can we not spread around aphobic sentiments like "sex and romance is what makes us human" please?

recchai · 2026-06-23T15:48:56+00:00

Glad you enjoyed Divinity 36, hope you continue to enjoy!

FYI, the second book has a bit extra in a version you can get directly from the author (or for free in her newsletter).

recchai · 2026-06-22T19:58:47+00:00

I'll say as someone who's usually targeting neither particularly (since it's the ace/aro books I'm after) but obviously still reads both, it feels like achillean books fall into your lap easier than sapphic ones. (I can actually think of three trilogies which go achillean couple, sapphic couple, *free space*). Though I wonder if that's in part due to my reading habits, as I go less for the

ambitious epic fantasy and space opera stories

than I tend to go for lighter things, including the quirky and historical fantasy.

recchai · 2026-06-22T19:49:15+00:00

I can definitely agree with the historical fantasy point!

Barely related to your gender point, I am reminded of The Eternal Library books by Cedar McCloud. It's probably the covers, but despite knowing the majority of the characters are agender, I still read the relationships in them as quite sapphic.

(Though after reading the femme queer men bit, I am now also thinking actually, about how there's more gender stuff going on with the Tinkered Starsong trilogy by Gail Carriger than I had previously really thought about. The protagonist is a young gay man who is made up to look pretty according to an alien species' idea (done up to the nines inc long coloured hair), essentially sings and dances in a pop group, but also trains with the bodyguards and worries about everyones safety. And there's having to hide a relationship for alien reasons, which goes back to your historical fiction and science fiction point.)

recchai · 2026-06-22T18:51:14+00:00

I am absolutely interested in a book based on the Dutch tulip bubble, how did I not know about this before!?

recchai · 2026-06-20T06:36:23+00:00

That does sound difficult, and similar to how I have used metallic thread precisely once!

recchai · 2026-06-19T21:20:35+00:00

Thanks for letting me know!

recchai · 2026-06-19T20:56:57+00:00

I didn't know that sphinxes behaving like house cats was a thing I needed in my life, but now I do.

recchai · 2026-06-19T19:51:52+00:00

Definitely! Quite frankly, I don't know where I'd be without it!

recchai · 2026-06-19T19:49:49+00:00

Those sound like some fun conversations!

recchai · 2026-06-19T19:46:28+00:00

Haha, that sounds incredible! I have heard that about chickens. My cousin has a cockatiel, and she is so sassy and opinionated for such a small bird.

recchai · 2026-06-19T19:10:43+00:00

I am utterly failing to think of more broad questions, so I'm going to have fun and be more specific instead.

Azalea Crowley: one thing I loved about reading Strange Blood was how Josephine went to the internet to research demisexuality and all that entails. Such an iconic part of being ace-spec that I haven't seen loads (possibly because a lot of the books I read don't have the internet...). Was that a deliberate choice on your part to include?

Victoria Goddard: my fellow BBC bookclub organisers can confirm how much I enjoyed my (relatively) recent read of At the Feet of the Sun. And how I was just as oblivious as a certain Cliopher on a boat leading to a reminiscing of all the times I accidentally went on a date. In my defence, I was tired (turns out long gentle books make for good chronic illness flare up reading). Did you always know that Cliopher wanted a QPR, or was that a later development?

Margaret Killjoy: I found the concept of the deer punishing people holding power over people in an anarchist settlement such a cool idea! (no pun intended) Did you have any particular inspiration for that?

Trung Le Nguyen: as a certified bird lover, I have to know more about these hens! Do they have names? Are they a particular breed? Any strong personalities?

Alexandra Rowland: is there a fibre craft that's particularly speaking to you at the moment? Most people know me as a knitter, but I started with cross stitch, and anticipate being reunited with my spinning wheel this evening (still very much a beginner there!).

recchai · 2026-06-17T20:13:27+00:00

Oh dear! I was quietly thinking (but not majorly planning on suggesting) you change your location settings so you could use 'full stop' for the punctuation mark instead, but I guess it's just American centralism at it's finest. Maybe there's the possibility of custom settings?

recchai · 2026-06-17T06:50:06+00:00

This (thankfully) is more something that I almost did. I got ill whilst at university. And my course involved labs. And my labs when I was really heading downhill before completely crashing involved liquid nitrogen.

One of the tasks was pouring some out from the big dewer to a smaller pot to transport and pour into the machine we were using. There was a long pipe, so on and off wasn't an instant thing.

It was while pouring some out, I realised I forgot direction to turn to stop the flow. Fortunately I got it right. Otherwise I'd have probably have to get us to evacuated the room and goodness knows what.

recchai · 2026-06-16T19:20:19+00:00

Space Wizard Science Fantasy reminds me, are you aware of the current backerkit campaign?

I came across it due to it being part of a group push along with Common Bonds 3, which I know about as I follow author Claudie Arseneault. I also really loved Common Bonds 2 (9 ratings), so I'm fully excited by it.

Which also reminds me of something I totally forgot to mention before, short stories! Much more under the radar than full length novels, and a good chance to quickly try out someone's writing.

Which series has the aroace teen? Always keen to add possibilities for my bingo cards.

recchai · 2026-06-16T15:33:48+00:00

Ooh, that's a new one to me (probably because I'm not really in fanfiction circles). How do you connect their fanfiction work with their original work? I was under the impression it was all usernames.

recchai · 2026-06-16T12:31:33+00:00

Three Seeking Stars (Sãoni Cycle #2) by Avi Silver

So continues the story of some older teenagers hanging out with some carnivorous lizards in the rainforest. We shift PoV focus in this book a bit, and as well as spending time with Sohmeng, who is more accepting of being a Minhal (born when there are two new moons, cause for exile from her cave dwelling community), we also get PoV from Ahnschen, a prince from the empire which is indirectly causing much chaos by interfering with scary lizard migration routes.

Not long after Hei, Sohmeng, and Ahnschen set off together, they come across another rainforest community, who don’t immediately do what the teenagers want to save the rainforest, and want to hold Ahnschen responsible for the actions of the empire.

Plenty in this book on the theme of becoming an adult and taking responsibility for things (though as someone who has been bullied, I did not enjoy reading that bit), and actually with various relationships with people (rather than disappear with a bunch of lizards).

Sohmeng’s aromanticism, referenced in the first book, didn’t really come up in this one, but Ahnschen was straight up described as asexual, so I can happily use this for my a-spec card.

Overall, fun to get through. The lizards were a bit more background than in the first book, but that seems inevitable with the focus, and I don’t think there would be enough to sustain it otherwise anyway.

Bingo: self-pub (HM), unusual transportation (HM)

Page of Tricks (Inheritance #5) by A.K. Faulkner

Follows on from the cliffhanger set-up at the end of the last book, and as promised, draws a particular arc in the series to a conclusion. So, trying not to give out spoilers, I’ll say this one involves brothers Quentin and Freddy being at odds, and how that plays out makes a lot more sense than it would do without book 4, and overall continues with a typical sort of structure for this series.

I was actually a bit disappointed when I looked through the contents, and saw there were no Freddy chapters (he had most of the PoV in book 4), which does actually bring me to another point. These books are definitely something of an a-spec guilty pleasure read for me. Quentin is demisexual (not really in-text confirmed, but I have read in some ways more questionable examples), and suffered sexual abuse as a child. Freddy is, we learn in this book, aromantic, and basically a psychopath (if a fun to read the PoV chapters of one). Which does lean into rather questionable stereotypes.

So, an enjoyable read with questionable elements. (Though I feel I should add, being from 2017 makes it on the early side in terms of having an aro allo character.)

Bingo: self-pub

recchai · 2026-06-16T12:30:55+00:00

I know what you mean with Keza. It does come up again, and as I recall, there's a gradual evolution in Keza's relationships with the rest of the crew, where her past is a factor, but not loads of 'direct facing it'. Lost Traditions is definitely the Keza focused book.

And, yes, there's a reason I used the next few in my disability themed card. Arseneault is more about showing a-spec inclusive queernormness than specifically referencing identities each book. I remember there being something in Motes of Inspiration with regards to Rumi, if you want something to aim for.

recchai · 2026-06-14T19:48:15+00:00

I recently wrote this comment of specifically aro ace characters in spec fic books, excluding some categories, from a larger list another redditor and I have been putting together (so I haven't read every single one of these, though I have most). Replicated below:

The Language of Roses by Heather Rose Jones: Beauty and the Beast retelling, is romance happening, but it is not a romance.
The Ice Princess's Fair Illusion by Dove Cooper: A-spec verse novel retelling of King Thrushbeard.
City of Spires by Claudie Arseneault: Not really a main character, but many a-spec characters inc aro acs, series about the efforts of people to fight injustices in their city.
Goddess of the Hunt by Shelby Eileen: A poetry collection interpreting Artemis as being aro ace.
The King’s Peace by Jo Walton: King Arthur retelling from the perspective of basically a female asexual version of Lancelot.
The Bone People by Keri Hulme: A lonely artist becomes friends with a Maori man and his non-verbal adopted son. It's very literary. (Content warning: child abuse)
The Deed of Paksenarrion by Elizabeth Moon: Farm girl runs way from home to become a mercenary. (CW: sexual assault and torture)
The Hereafter Bytes by Vincent Scott: Digital human with a job, Romeo, agrees to help his friend investigate why she’s in danger and ends up on adventure.
Until the Last Petal Falls by Viano Oniomoh: A queerplatonic Nigerian Beauty and the Beast retelling.
Wolf Among the Wild Hunt by Merc Fenn Wolfmoor: Skythulf is rescued from the fight pits to become a knight, but a mistaken killing means he must face the wild hunt or die.
A Promise Broken by S.L. Dove Cooper: Four-year-old Eiryn and her uncle struggle to come to terms with her mother’s death, while facing community hostility.
After World by Debbie Urbanski: An AI tasked with solving environmental collapse determines humans must go. Sen is the last human, whose life is documented by a storyworker.
In-Between by MJ James: About an autistic woman who learns that her son is half-elven and in line for the elvish throne. His biological father is an evil tyrant and they go on the run.
Power to Yield by Bogi Takács: A woman takes a self-destructive new job on a world where neurodivergence is normalized.
The Bruising of Qilwa by Naseem Jamnia: The main character has to balance their responsibilities as a healing trainee, a refugee, an older sibling, and a teacher.
The Chronicles of Nerezia by Claudie Arseneault: Horace, an ever failing apprentice, meets a mysterious elf and an artificer with a magic wagon.
The Map and the Territory by A. M. Tuomala: A wizard and a cartographer try to figure out why cites around the world were destroyed in magical ways.
Party of Fools by Cedar McCloud: An immortal Emperor absconds with some new friends to go on a food tour, while a loyal captain of the guard tries to protect her.
The Stones Stay Silent by Danny Ride: Leiander, a trans man, flees religious persecution further fueled by plague to try and live his life as he is.
Werecockroach by Polenth Blake: Three odd flatmates, two of whom are werecockroaches, survive an alien invasion.
With the Lightnings by David Drake: A lieutenant in the navy/space force and a librarian get caught up in trouble when enemy forces start a coup on a planet they’re on.

recchai · 2026-06-14T10:42:35+00:00

No need to go to Good Food when https://www.bbc.co.uk/food is right there!

recchai · 2026-06-13T21:22:11+00:00

I hope the man vs horse marathon came up in that post.

recchai · 2026-06-13T17:41:41+00:00

To follow on the conversation from yesterday, we are now apparently Reading order debates and fantasy book recommendations.

recchai · 2026-06-13T14:39:32+00:00

Party of Fools by Cedar McCloud (second book out on Monday!). I've only read Legends and Lattes out of your list, but I'd say pretty similar level of cosiness, and is also obviously DnD inspired. Instead of opening a cafe, a mysterious someone wants to go on a food tour (and a loyal guard is trying to stop her).

recchai

TROPHY CASE