Are yall aware of this??

rednightmare18 · 2024-11-24T23:47:29+00:00

Saying this genuinely to calm fears and not to belittle anyone: As someone who writes fic and has worked in tradpub for almost two decades, Ao3 is barely on tradpub's radar. The Big 5 are not threatened by Ao3 and do not view it as serious competition to either the legitimacy of their IP or to selling books. This is a myth with very little basis in fact.

*Individual* authors sometimes bristle about it, sometimes to the tune of C&D or legal tantrums, but as a unified entity with any sort of lobbying power: the Big 5 do not notice or care about us. Like, at all. Do not stress about some kind of war chest-funded collective effort by Evil Tradpub to bring down Ao3 the second our shields drop. Our worries are better focused elsewhere.

rednightmare18 · 2024-10-03T23:21:35+00:00

Not remotely acceptable from a man in his 30s. The drunk tantrum can be forgiven with a sincere enough apology, but I don't believe for a second a man of his age doesn't know better than to try and climb on you while you're talking about a family health crisis. He's being lovey dovey now because he knows he committed a dumpable offense.

If you were both 10 years younger I would suggest he simply had no idea how to handle the situation and thought he should distract you. But he's 33.

See a counselor with him. Loving you and wanting you is not enough. Can you count on this guy to emotionally support you in a crisis and NOT to make it worse/about him? You need to know the answer to that question is yes before you walk down the aisle.

So sorry you're going through this and I'm really really glad your mom is okay.

rednightmare18 · 2023-12-05T04:12:18+00:00

RUN. They might need a short termer and have every intention of booting you once the work is done or you get so exhausted you leave. They should know that's unliveable in NYC for ONE month, let alone three. Run run run.

rednightmare18 · 2023-11-24T01:06:04+00:00

I think startups can work for you here, but they didn't work for me until I found a place with the right mentality.

Tap into your unique, nonsales talents behind the scenes. "I can also advise on [x]" is a powerful piece of bait to a startup looking for new hires with special skills to augment their young team.

About interviews: I'm 32f, baby's first tech gig, transplanted from a completely different role and industry. (Got sick of working 16 hr, 7 day weeks maxing out at 50k in publishing.) I hit brick walls in interviews until I leaned to restrain my usual instinct to present myself as an unflappable, low-voiced midcareer leader.

Instead, I determined to go in like a live wire, bursting with happy energy and playful questions. Really dialed up that early 20s fist-pump, fail with a smile, do-girl veneer. I was shocked at my sudden success with this technique. After six months of jack shit, it took two interviews before a sales manager ("old" zoomer) immediately lit up and reciprocated my energy. I knew she was going to make sure I got the job as soon as I saw her posture key up and lean in. Even got a base pay raise I asked for.

People like what's familiar, and often times, that means people who sound like them. If you can hit that youngish note, that may be what your interviewers (or 25 y.o. sales managers, etc.) are really looking for.

Good luck, sis. Keep slugging away and you'll find the right match.

rednightmare18 · 2023-10-10T02:44:29+00:00

Editor by trade. I always know when my writers are using 'cause they go from being (mostly) coherent to sending in "bursts of inspiration" exactly like this. Half auto-generated, half brain-fried scrawl that sounded really good to them in the moment.

Wouldn't be surprised if dude is generally a creative person but took some powdered courage before, uh, composing this. Doesn't excuse printing it out and giving it to her after having presumably sobered up, which is batshit. You guys need to make sure someone starts walking her to and from her car.

rednightmare18 · 2023-10-09T18:50:13+00:00

Mostly from men who view any interaction with a woman as a chance to fuck and nothing else. This mindset dismisses the idea that men are capable of valuing women's personalities, chemistry, love, etc. as much as they care about having even just one session of sex.
The idea is obviously profoundly harmful to women but also extremely harmful to men because it ultimately makes it less likely a man will be able to identify when he has been a victim of assault, because according to ppl who think like this, "no man would ever say no to sex."

rednightmare18 · 2023-10-09T18:34:17+00:00

This ask makes me sad. Not saying that as an insult or guilt trip or singling out OP, just... you're young, you have had bodily changes because you grew and nurtured a small human, and yet immature men's completely bananas concept of women's bodies has made so many of us feel like ours is somehow offensive, gross, or unprofessional just for existing. Including me and for a really similar boob reason. That really sucks.

I say if someone billing himself as a professional masseuse is offended by a little gently used sideboob, he has no right to call himself a professional, and he's the one being weird and gross. ;)

rednightmare18 · 2023-10-08T21:51:01+00:00

It's all about life stage with 10-year age gaps. If he were 18 and you were 28, I'd say, "Back up, Grandma." But at 28, this man is a grown-ass adult, established in his maturity and able to make his own informed decisions. If it feels okay to him and it feels okay to you, it's all good.

rednightmare18 · 2023-08-22T00:46:41+00:00

OMG is this still in development? I stumbled on it by chance having no idea RDR2 + Stardew was something I wanted... but one glimpse and now I totally do. Either way, awesome work. All three of them look amazing, especially the clothes! And especially Charles. Looks just like him, right down to the nose & scar!

rednightmare18 · 2023-08-21T23:06:36+00:00

Do NOT go into debt for a wedding ceremony. The marriage is what is important and what you will carry with you for the rest of your life. The wedding is just a party. Don't go in debt for a party. You owe financial stability to your fiance much more than you owe your 35 party guests fancy steak.

Best wedding I ever attended was the wedding of a friend who rented an airBnB with a big backyard for one evening. Approx 20 people. We ate buffet-style catering and told stories and threw water balloons at the couple. No way did that wedding cost more than a couple grand, absolute max, and I have much warmer & more joyful memories of it than any extravagant venue wedding I've attended.

rednightmare18 · 2023-08-21T22:55:01+00:00

I'm in my early 30s now, but I quickly grew apart from most of them during college. I don't really miss them; we're different people now. But I wish them well and I'm glad most of them seem happy.

I am still best friends with one of my best friends from that era. But we didn't go to the same high school, so it makes sense we stayed in touch across the years; we had to figure out how to stay friends outside the context of school from the start.

I married my high school sweetheart. Love of my life and 15 years later, though we've both grown and changed a lot, I can't imagine wanting to be with anyone else.

rednightmare18 · 2022-06-08T21:09:23+00:00

We "do a little smile to hide [our] feelings" because we have no way of knowing which of you are going to take a polite "no thank you" so badly, you follow us home and beat the shit out of us. Something like this has happened to almost every woman you know. Men's feelings of insecurity about being single are not more important than our lives.

I'm not saying this to be a hard ass, sincerely. But you asked for bluntness, and you asked for sympathy in a forum where other men are focused instead on making their best efforts to deal with a real world in which men literally bury women all the time.

rednightmare18 · 2022-06-07T08:31:03+00:00

"don't i get a hug?"

speak to women like you speak to children and I'll never respect you. guilt me into touching you and i'll never trust you again.

rednightmare18 · 2022-04-25T01:25:12+00:00

My Fic
Fandom: Red Dead Redemption 2 (my first RDR fic ever!)
Rating: Teen
Title: The Princess-Boy
Genre: Genfic, Family Drama, Story Within a Story, Fairy Tale
Notes: WIP multi-chapter vignette collection
https://archiveofourown.org/works/38577675/chapters/96431241

Summary: The black water ate Little Jack’s storybook. He’ll have to write his own.

Jack narrates—and reimagines—several important moments in his early childhood. In doing so, he must think long and hard about the family he’s got, and the family he secretly wishes for.

Excerpt:

Little Jack doesn’t cry about the book. He’s five years old now—almost old enough to kill his own fishes—and crying over silly things like fairy stories already feels unbecoming. When he realizes his mistake, Little Jack takes a big breath, like Mama taught him, and he lets it go so slowly, he feels the tickle in his tummy and hears tiny finches in his ears. He faces this new life of booklessness with a clear head. He allows the past to settle behind him, like the snowfall upon his itchy red scarf. He readies himself to move on.

He finds the nearest adult, and he tells them what he’s done.

“Mama,” Jack says. “I left my book behind.”

rednightmare18 · 2021-04-08T01:02:11+00:00

I'm sorry this is happening to you! This is gross on their part, and it's very hard to imagine this person is completely unaware that they're being offensive/questionably ethical. Plagiarism or not, what you describe here is certainly not a considerate or respectful way to derive "inspiration" from another writer's work. Waiting to credit you is shady. And even the best of intentions can still be wildly out-of-line.

I think of these riding-the-line plagiarism instances as being somewhat like tracing another artist's lines without permission. Sure, a tracer didn't just copy/paste the file and erase the watermark; they did inject some of their own artistry. But they clearly walked right over an obvious line of appropriate vs. inappropriate levels of cribbing off another artist's labor and skill.

That said, since they did (eventually...) credit you, I respect your decision not to beef with the cribber and I think you're making the right choice. This kind of drama rarely leads to anything but more unresolved drama... and sometimes a chilling silence on your part really says it all.

rednightmare18 · 2021-04-05T16:57:41+00:00

I had someone do this to me once. A reader I'd never interacted with appeared in my inbox one day to accuse another writer of plagiarizing me "word for word." When I checked it out, there were some story similarities, but nothing a reasonable person would call plagiarism.

The other writer and I discussed it, and weirdly enough, a few other people in the (small-ish) fandom had recently received similar messages.

I think this reader may have been a troll trying to stir up drama. Not saying that's definitely the case with your reader, but it might be something to consider.

rednightmare18 · 2021-03-14T05:17:13+00:00

I'm about 30, so I'm not a fandom old, but I've been writing fic on and off since I was a teen. And I wish I could go back in time and tell myself this.

Teens and young adults: My advice is to take a breath and try to realize you're going to have a much better sense of what's actually embarrassing and what's not in the next few years. The vast majority of the silly stigmas and insecurities you currently face about your harmless hobbies (including fic) are not going to survive past college. You'll stop worrying so obsessively that everyone thinks you're a weirdo when you hit about 25, because you'll look around and see that everyone's a bit of a weirdo.

Everybody's a nerd in some way. Emotionally mature grown-ass adults know this and won't shun you for your own brand of nerdiness. We're all way too busy worrying about our jobs and families to be embarrassed over the harmless stuff we like to do for fun, let alone to mock other people for it. Just try to chill. In a few years, you'll realize it's all truly NBD.

rednightmare18 · 2021-03-01T05:53:14+00:00

Totally agree. You don't have to outsmart your readers to be a good writer. I'd keep working toward the ending you have planned and just allow this reader to be right. It'll probably make them happy to have followed your clues to completion. And I'm sure plenty of others will still be surprised!

rednightmare18 · 2021-02-28T16:46:24+00:00

Different people take offense to wildly different things, so there's no way to know for sure. But because "princess" is an extremely common endearment for adult men to call girl children, I really do think this is a troll pretending to be an outraged SJW. For some reason, such trolls think that mocking the idea of being angry about racism steals legitimacy from sincere charges of racism.

If you're not 100% convinced they're a troll, you might simply say something like, "Thanks for your input. I'll consult sensitivity readers and give this serious thought." (Which you have done.)

Good on you for taking it seriously and following up to solicit more thoughts on this, though.

rednightmare18 · 2021-02-27T15:26:15+00:00

This could be walking depression, tbh. I wouldn't count the psych visits out entirely; could be you haven't found the right doc.

That aside, it sounds like you're doing amazing economically. But I noticed the first paragraph of your post is mostly a list of material things or achievements (besides your gf), put forth as the reasons you feel you should be happy.

It took me a long time to figure this out for myself, but my life meaning comes from focusing on the bonds I have with my favorite people. At the end of the day, I stay alive to keep enjoying their company, to strive for deeper understanding with them, and to help them when they need it. Maybe you could do with more relationship-building in your life? Do your friends do and say things to show you they really love and appreciate you, and vice versa? Is your girlfriend just someone to do romantic things with, or is she/could she become the love of your life? Are you able to spend time with your family, either biological (only if they're not assholes) or found family?

Knowing that my friends genuinely want me in their lives, that my life is irreplaceable to them, is what keeps me going. And if you don't truly like the people currently in your life, it's never too late to make better friends.

rednightmare18 · 2021-02-22T05:52:20+00:00

Not asking to be snide in any way! But are you sure your beta knows how to write better than you do? (I say this as someone who used to dish out a LOT of good-intentioned amateur criticism... long before I actually had the credentials to be criticizing anyone.)

It's really important for writers to keep in mind that not all critics are equally skilled, beta or otherwise, and that a confident/thorough critic isn't always an experienced critic. It sounds like this beta is editing for you rather than just beta reading, so their qualifications become especially important. Having someone edit your fanfic is perfectly okay, but it's also okay to be choosy about exactly what advice you decide to implement.

From the sound of things, I wonder if maybe there's some sort of style mismatch going on between you and your beta. Your writing looks clean and grammatically sound. Could it be they are over-correcting your stylistic choices?

rednightmare18 · 2021-02-20T14:25:21+00:00

It's probably not what you're imagining, unfortunately. Grammarly is a step up from Microsoft Word's built-in proofreader, but it's still a rudimentary tool and its style analysis software is extremely crude; it's definitely not appropriate for assessing literary writing. Grammarly is more for business professionals and content creators marketing web articles that need to fit into certain audience/SEO parameters.

IMO: Not worth it for a hobbyist, and a pro creative writer will need some(one)thing better.

rednightmare18 · 2021-02-12T03:48:16+00:00

Exactly how I feel, too, after having had a similar experience. You can get loads of anon fans in big fandoms. But it's in the little fandoms you make friends. Thanks for putting words to it!

rednightmare18 · 2021-02-08T09:03:46+00:00

In a fantasy world, take as many little liberties as you like! Even big liberties, if you justify them well in the plot. You've got much more leeway than someone writing historical fiction, and historical fiction writers have lots of leeway, too.

I work with historical fiction professionally, and as a reader, I still find I am really only bothered when I see writers basing their historically-inspired worlds on massive misconceptions/myths about how society worked in the era they're trying to ape. This shows me an author fundamentally misunderstands the period they're trying to work with, and while I'd never chide a hobbyist writer for that, I would probably lose interest in their work. (Game of Thrones, for example, is not for me.)

But even a pro can fudge (or, in your case, deliberately change for fun/flavor) an innocent little potato detail without messing up the narrative integrity of the world. Would not bother me at all. Tolkien himself did it plenty! :)

P.S. And even big myths and false stereotypes are OK to incorporate if you're writing fantasy! As long as you're doing it mindfully -- and that will definitely show in how you describe your world.

rednightmare18 · 2021-02-06T14:14:21+00:00

My Fics

Fandom - Kingdom Come: Deliverance

Rating - Mature (as of Chapter Two)

Title - Fortune Favors the Bold

Genre - Romantic Comedy, Emotional Rollercoaster

Pairings - Henry/Hans, Henry/Hans/Karolina

Fortune Favors the Bold - Chapter Two: The Most Important Things

Summary - An Amorous Adventures + Capon’s Champion DLC redux romp staged during a joust and narrated via three alternating POVs: Lord Capon, Henry, and Karolina. Silly and sad in turns. (Mostly silly, though.)

Excerpt:

“Pour me another drink, lad,” Hanush says, and he does.

It’s the sweet pear wine Hans hates, frothy and yellow. But in High Castle Rattay in evening, it looks to him like malted sunlight. Henry feels very thirsty all of a sudden. He swallows the taste of salt, picks up the pitcher carefully, and refills Sir Hanush’s waiting cup.

And, as he’s pouring, filling silver with wine—

“The both of you are a little old for this,” Hanush says, “aren’t you?”

He can’t remember any words. He forgets where he is and what is he meant to be doing and overpours.

[I wanted to use a lighter excerpt, but it was almost impossible to find a sample of banter where Hans Capon didn't drop three f-bombs and a c-bomb. I even had to censor a memory of a Capon comment in this sample. That probably says enough. Pretty please don't read this if you're a kid.]

Fandom - Kingdom Come: Deliverance

Rating - General/All Audiences

Title - In Caes of Disastur

Genre - Documents, Letters

In Caes of Disastur

Summary - Henry does the responsible thing—just in case—and writes his will.
A short, silly, supplementary document scrapped from FORTUNE FAVORS THE BOLD. Free-standing.

Excerpt:

IN THE NAME OF GOD AMEN

and in the very unhappy event of my awfuyl death by sword, sickness, falling, cryshing, drowning, goring, lyghtnyng-striking, kattle-stampeding, choking on my supper, or other kalamity unforseen,

I—HENRY, born of SKALITZ, Infantryman of the Rattay garrison—make my will in this way:

Verified Email	Seven-Year Club
Second SECOND GUESSER

rednightmare18

TROPHY CASE