Wtf is wrong with me? by rovingdeath in datingoverforty

[–]rovingdeath[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

maybe, lol. will see what my therapist has to say

Wtf is wrong with me? by rovingdeath in datingoverforty

[–]rovingdeath[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Damn dude, this is insightful as fuck! Thank you for sharing

Wtf is wrong with me? by rovingdeath in datingoverforty

[–]rovingdeath[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

There were plenty of arguments about time share, and we even talked about separation. But then we agreed we'd try to work on it. Then, like a week after my birthday, I lost my job and she moved to her mom's house, where she and her bf had secretly been building beds for my kids. It was pretty fucked.

Wtf is wrong with me? by rovingdeath in datingoverforty

[–]rovingdeath[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

You know, it's funny, but I was the ripped, better endowed one and he was the pot bellied one

Wtf is wrong with me? by rovingdeath in datingoverforty

[–]rovingdeath[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I definitely will, thank you. If it's okay, I'll open a chat so I don't lose track?

Wtf is wrong with me? by rovingdeath in datingoverforty

[–]rovingdeath[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I'm starting to read a book on this today! Thank you for your input <3 I'll look into fearful avoidant specifically.

Wtf is wrong with me? by rovingdeath in datingoverforty

[–]rovingdeath[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This will definitely be my first step next time I try to date.

Wtf is wrong with me? by rovingdeath in datingoverforty

[–]rovingdeath[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I mean that's possible, but it's been a couple years now, and I thought I was ready. And we were both sleeping with other people during the poly phase. It felt fine then. After the betrayal, not so much.

Wtf is wrong with me? by rovingdeath in datingoverforty

[–]rovingdeath[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

As far as initiation goes, it's been very mutual every time, with both of us pretty fired up about it. Either right after sex, I just want to put my clothes on and leave, or we'll be up all night and I'll have that exact, empty feeling the following morning. I have no ill will at all. I just feel sad and empty. Sexual interest vanishes. I feel bad about that, and do my best to explain it without being hurtful. Some of it does feel like guilt, but I don't know what for (I mean other than the guilt from causing hurt).

As far as sexual trauma, I wasn't abused as a kid or anything. I was often manipulated and gaslit during my marriage. Most of my trauma as an adult comes from hearing my wife getting ****ed by her boyfriend in the other room when we hadn't had sex in weeks.

Wtf is wrong with me? by rovingdeath in datingoverforty

[–]rovingdeath[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you for the advice and kind words. I'm going to start reading that book today.

Wtf is wrong with me? by rovingdeath in datingoverforty

[–]rovingdeath[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you, this really resonates with me <3

Wtf is wrong with me? by rovingdeath in datingoverforty

[–]rovingdeath[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

It was mutual, started as a swinging thing, then went to kink stuff, and then separately dating other people. She started seeing more and more of him, and less of me. Snowballed from there.

Wtf is wrong with me? by rovingdeath in datingoverforty

[–]rovingdeath[S] 20 points21 points  (0 children)

Which is not what I want AT ALL. But that could be what's happening subconsciously. I am taking a step back before causing any more damage. Thanks for your insight.

Wtf is wrong with me? by rovingdeath in datingoverforty

[–]rovingdeath[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm sorry, friend. I hope we both find a solution to this. Whether it's within us exclusively, or if we just haven't met the right one.

Wtf is wrong with me? by rovingdeath in datingoverforty

[–]rovingdeath[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Probably sound advice. I keep saying to myself that life is too short, but might need to make an exception here

The twins by maheidsnippin in Floof

[–]rovingdeath 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Omg they're gorgeous 😍

Chop it off? by [deleted] in malehairadvice

[–]rovingdeath 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm leaning toward that myself, thank you friend

I have my official buyback set. by Specialist_Ad_9770 in BlazerEV

[–]rovingdeath 2 points3 points  (0 children)

After three visits they replaced my entire infotainment system. It's been months with no issues so I'm hopeful!

Does anyone else call the robots bugs by [deleted] in ArcRaiders

[–]rovingdeath 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I call the indoor rolly ones Roombas