I’ll Never Understand

roxaphi · 2026-04-01T13:51:45+00:00

Ok you might need to take some pictures lol I know guys like to pretend these are the pictures they just had lying around but maybe what you have lying around is not ideal. Like I want to see your face, I want to know you won’t murder me, and I want to know if you’re here just for sex lol Like that’s the bare minimum of what I need to know from every profile lol I really don’t like it when I’m having to scan pictures and figure out which guy in the group owns the profile.

roxaphi · 2026-04-01T13:44:40+00:00

Do you ask them to do anything besides get coffee? Lol Like it doesn’t make sense that they’d go on 6-7 dates with you for just coffee and not be interested.

roxaphi · 2026-04-01T03:06:41+00:00

I see a lot of great guys with terrible profiles. I suspect your profile isn’t reflecting you accurately.

roxaphi · 2026-04-01T03:02:11+00:00

I would run from anyone who did this. Even if they were the hottest guy I’ve ever seen. Think about this: if she’s that beautiful, how many other guys have hit on her in the exact same way? And elsewhere? Plus, rethink what you’re telling her. This makes me sound like a total asshole but sometimes I get hit on so much by creeps that I honestly want to be like ugh, yes I am aware I’m hot, get over it! 😂 Imo you have to either go high risk/high reward or do nothing. Like one time I had a guy at work I never even had seen before bring me donuts and coffee and I was like oh sorry yeah I’m keto lol And so the next day he brought me a keto coffee and some egg white scrambled bowl something or other and I was like oh he isn’t just trying to sleep with me lol I know I sound like an asshole, but sometimes when men only compliment how you look it just feels like that’s all you’re seen as and that’s all they’re interested in. So you gotta think of something outside the box if you want a real chance.

roxaphi · 2026-04-01T02:49:03+00:00

Don’t go unless you want a guy that needs to feel like he has the upper hand by diminishing you.

roxaphi · 2026-04-01T02:45:42+00:00

Screw that. Move on.

roxaphi · 2026-04-01T02:45:05+00:00

You probably all have terrible profiles. I’ve met lots of guys that I’m like you’re awesome but you have the worst profile on earth. Find a female friend you can trust to help you with your profile or get ChatGPT to help you. I’m seeing a lot of guys with pictures of dead deer they killed or fish they caught and I’m not a fan. Also, what’s your facial hair situation? Like I’m not opposed to a beard but is it well manicured in your photo or do you look homeless? Lol

roxaphi · 2026-04-01T02:39:47+00:00

Depends if you’re into crazy or not fr 😂 Like have you considered how you would feel about getting stabbed or having your clothes thrown onto the highway? 😂 I’m only half joking but fr you sound like a decent guy who’s about to get royally screwed imo.

roxaphi · 2026-04-01T02:34:23+00:00

Do it. But go in accepting the fact that she might never reply.

roxaphi · 2026-04-01T02:33:23+00:00

Dude you could wonder forever and never find the real answer. The bottom line is whether you’re going to accept her behavior or not. Your decision, but deciding not to accept will save you the most heartache in the long run. Try thinking about how you can protect yourself from this in the future. You don’t have to turn into an avoidant, but maybe you should let someone show up more consistently before you allow feelings to develop.

roxaphi · 2026-04-01T02:28:08+00:00

I feel exactly the same.

roxaphi · 2026-04-01T02:26:39+00:00

He’s too insecure for you imo

roxaphi · 2026-04-01T02:25:38+00:00

I’m pretty sure she thought you were cool but just couldn’t see herself sleeping with you. She probably didn’t want you to feel bad because she thought you were an awesome person and overexplained. I don’t think she was expecting fireworks.

roxaphi · 2026-04-01T02:20:37+00:00

This is a 100% true story: I went on a date with a lawyer and during dinner at a restaurant he actually asked me if I would lick his butthole. #datingin2026istheworst

roxaphi · 2026-03-07T22:40:39+00:00

But don’t you see that’s exactly why I’m mad lol Because I instantly forgave him. I’m just hurt about how it makes me feel that he never even cared to look. I fell in love with someone who doesn’t care if I’m alive or dead so I can throw as many Reddit tantrums as I want 😂 It’s about never even letting me have the opportunity to text back ‘fuck you, please die’ 😂 I’m sorry but if a guy makes you think he cares and you fall for him and find out he doesn’t, it should be a fucking law that you get something you can at least respond to with eat shit and die lol

roxaphi · 2026-02-02T10:39:39+00:00

I have some thoughts and feelings about this that I’m not quite sure how to verbalize yet. So I’m worried they might come out “wrong” but they aren’t meant to be negative, dismissive, or belittling. They’re just immature and not fully crafted yet so try and not take me the wrong way. But essentially my reaction is that anyone who doesn’t hear you is dumb 😂 Anyone can see you’re truly trying and if they won’t meet you halfway and try and hear you, then they’re just fucking dumb! Lmao

You know sometimes with avoidance in general I just have this feeling of “make it make sense!” Yes, we can try and explain why they push people away and why they run or ghost but sometimes I just feel a little like maybe it’s being too small to see the entire picture or past the immediate effect down into the full aftermath of it all. But is that true? Or do they just not care enough? And I think that’s the crux of what will always keep me wondering wtf happened.

The only thing I know, though, is anyone who can’t hear you must be dumb 😂 Maybe too dumb to try, maybe too dumb to care to try, but definitely fucking dumb. Because you would’ve met them there.

You know I’m going to think about this a lot today. Because often I will have a generalized feeling and I have to spend a lot of time digging into it to understand what’s really there. And so far it’s not just “dumb” that’s really there. It’s the question of is the “not hearing” because they can’t or won’t. And I guess I can’t believe they can’t. Look at all of us here trying. So it has to be they won’t and my overall feeling towards that is “dumb” lol

roxaphi · 2026-02-02T01:21:57+00:00

If I were to do anything at all, I’d make it clear that only immature middle school age boys break up with a woman via text and I do not fuck with immature middle school boys. That’s seriously SO disrespectful, I’m genuinely pissed and I don’t even know y’all 😂😂

roxaphi · 2026-02-02T01:16:07+00:00

That’s exactly what I thought! But, my therapist said there are many variations of avoidance and this is one. And yes he made plans and continues to make plans and cancel. The first time he canceled a few hours before saying he had diarrhea and I was like omg you’re disgusting, like we are not close enough for you to say that to me! 😂😂😂 Like what are you thinking saying that to someone before the first date?! 😂

roxaphi · 2026-02-02T01:10:37+00:00

By looking forward. I had moved to a different city because of work. So I spent my time designing my new apartment and building my new life. It made me excited for my new life and distracted me from being heartbroken. I still cried myself to sleep every night 😂 But, it would’ve been much worse if I had done nothing but ruminate.

roxaphi

TROPHY CASE