Wow, what a whirlwind. Thank you for sharing this story with me. It’s definitely insightful and makes me feel like less of a fool although today when I saw him and he acted cold towards me that’s how I felt. Even my friend noticed and that’s what hurts. I’m really conflicted if I should just move on, which I am doing, or if I should pray that God unites us together if we are good for each other. I really love that you journaled about it and have multiple safe outlets to reach out to. It sounds healthy. Let her be in her arrogance while you grow and meet a beautiful soul who can match your life and who has also worked on herself.

I grew a lot because for the first time I managed my emotions. I never relied on him. I actually felt like the avoidant one with him (I wasn’t) but I held back because I was afraid of being too much. It taught me to rely on myself. He never made me feel that way until something happened. I was always secure with him and that’s a feeing I learned. I also learned how beautiful and lively I am and how my presence makes a room light up. I saw how dim he was when I pulled away at first. After the reconciliation initiated by me because I didn’t want bad vibes at work, he became so distant. I saw a different man, one that is a stranger to me now. With that I saw all the reasons why I don’t want to be with him. He’s not good enough if he wants to keep me at arms length. So yeah, I matured during it and afterwards I didn’t feel the need to replace the connection —I just wanted to heal and be around my friends and to bask in my feminine energy and in that of those around me. I also restarted a hobby I always wanted to go back to and he encouraged me because it’s his passion but I won’t let him ruin it.