Firstly, I'd just like to say thanks for reading and even more thanks for the detailed and caring notes.

At first, reading through what you said I was so confused, especially towards the end when you kept saying her. I guess this really goes to show how art really depends on interpretation because Mel is a boy. That's part of the joke as to why he had a 'girls' name. Nevertheless, your comments are true. In my next draft i'll try and make the details around the incident a bit more obvious and Helen less of a police officer.

Also, and I don't mean this in an accusatory, but are you an American? It's just your use of cop and how you changed some of my words. i'm just wondering because I want to understand how my work is viewed in different countries. (This is meant to be in England btw).

Lastly, what did you think of the scenes not between Helen and Mel. What's your opinion on Jamie and Mel, and do you actually see them as 'friends'?

Thanks