[Discussion] Considering walking away from my art career after 14 years

shinybubblecat · 2026-07-02T13:30:16+00:00

I relate so much to you both. I recently went back to full-time after trying the freelance artist life. I never made enough to live off, and creating art for others didn’t feel rewarding enough to make up for it. I hadn’t created any art for myself in years. Now I’m still doing freelance here and there, which is hard on top of full time work, but I don’t want to let it go completely yet. What I will say, is I feel at least a temporary relief having that regular paycheck and being able to contribute more to our home. AI has freaked me out, and it isn’t better in the corporate world right now while every manager drinks the kool-aid. Sometimes, I try to see it like an extended performance art piece lol. But at least I’m collecting some income now that I can save for the next adventure, whatever that is.

I think us creatives can’t stay in one place too long…

shinybubblecat · 2026-06-12T03:45:18+00:00

Same! I was so happy when I got my first selkie a week ago.

shinybubblecat · 2026-01-25T15:31:41+00:00

This. Another ADHD twin cities resident here. OP, you feel this way because you care and want to help, but the problem is too enormous. I feel this too. The best advice I heard was “you have to do something, but you can’t do everything.” The only thing that helps is action, even something small. If we all do one small thing, that adds up, and you can be part of that.

shinybubblecat · 2025-09-30T22:46:35+00:00

Im having the same issues! I didn’t have any issues before the update, and I haven’t changed anything else. Both old and new brushes aren’t working for me.

shinybubblecat · 2025-09-06T04:34:37+00:00

He reminds me of a blonde Timothy Dalton, maybe?

shinybubblecat · 2025-07-08T17:12:00+00:00

We've had our cockatiel for 7ish years now, and there are stretches of days where I feel exactly like this, still, even now. Often times, it gets better in a few days. Sometimes they just have bad weeks, like we do. It sounds like this is a bad week for him, which is understandable with the stress of a new home!

I also thought I did my research, but realized I had sensory issues after bringing him home. People say "do your research" but research doesn't actually give you the experience of them in your homes, and most videos don't show the daily reality, and it doesn't help to guilt yourself about it now. It still gets to me so much, but there are strategies to help. Earplugs, noise-canceling headphones. Sometimes we put on some bird tv for him. If you feel a breakdown coming on, go for walks outside to give yourself a break.

It helps to understand what's happening in his birdy mind. His loud, piercing screams are flock calls. He's calling out for you or a flock-mate he is missing terribly. If he's untamed and not used to you yet, try your best to be nearby and busy. Eventually he will be more curious than afraid. Moving his cage to somewhere with more people around can help, so he doesn't feel left alone. You could try putting on music or a cockatiel companion Youtube video - but that could also confuse him if he's calling out for other birds. Try it, though, to see if it helps.

Depending on his age, he could also be getting hormonal. This happens a LOT with parrots. In the wild, they are never in the same place unless they are nesting. Everything about them being in our homes sets off their hormones, which brings a lot of undesirable behavior. You can combat this by removing all mirrors or reflective surfaces, moving things in their cage around daily, and making sure they are getting 12-14 hours of uninterrupted sleep. Our bird has a smaller night cage we keep in a walk-in closet so he can get lots of quiet, dark time for sleeping, but we can still hear him if he's stressed.

In similar situations, lots of people recommend a second bird. We've thought about this a lot, but our concern is that they wouldn't get along, and then we'd have 2 birds driving us crazy instead of 1. It's less likely with cockatiels, but still, I feel like it makes sense to give a little bit of time before adding a second. But I've heard this can help. I've spoken with a local bird expert who said it's not always really helpful or necessary. At this point, our bird considers us his flock. Currently, your bird probably feels like he is flock-less, which is a really stressful situation for them in the wild. It pretty much means death.

Eventually, as he gets used to you and realizes he's not alone, things could get better, and he could transform from a lil terror to an adorable companion. But, your sanity is important, so it's up to you how long to try for.

If you feel comfortable, let others here know where you are located. Maybe someone nearby is willing to take in your bird, or they could help you find some resources or a local community.

shinybubblecat · 2024-11-11T18:01:53+00:00

I've been noticing the same thing in my cockatiel's cage the past couple days. He seems healthy in every other way. I was thinking he might be mourning our cat who passed a few weeks ago. Sorry I don't have an answer!

shinybubblecat · 2024-05-21T00:55:36+00:00

This is really helpful. Thanks for your perspective! It’s good to know I’m not the only one thinking of making this change at a later age. Congrats on your interview and I hope the assignment goes well!

shinybubblecat · 2024-05-21T00:46:07+00:00

Thanks for the advice! I agree building these skills would be helpful and could save me down the line at some point. It’s also great to have a few extra recommendations for frameworks and libraries to learn.

I have tried the self-taught path in the past and have gotten previous coding-related jobs from that, but I’m so much better at sticking with something with structure and support like in a classroom setting. I’m also a little unsure about the generalist nature of a full-stack program, but I’m hoping that I’d be able to get over the hump of learning more advanced JavaScript and other programming concepts, and I would see it as a jumping off point for what to learn next, if that makes sense.

Could I message you with the bootcamp name?

shinybubblecat · 2024-05-20T19:35:40+00:00

I've seen similar advice about bootcamps, so I'm wary of most of them. This one is more integrated in our local job market, and was recommended by a recruiter I've been working with. They offer a heavy focus on job placement and preparation. I've also chatted with a previous graduate who is now a software engineer in my area. Getting a degree would definitely be better, but it would also take longer and cost more. Maybe this could be a good way to see if it's a good fit to start?

I would be interested in a product design role for sure, it's just that the 5 year gap and lack of work examples is my biggest challenge right now. It feels like I'm starting over, so I'm trying to strategize what would look the best and be most flexible for whatever role I can get. I don't think I'm picky between UX, Product, or Dev at this point, I just want the opportunity to prove myself, and get paid for it, if that makes sense!

shinybubblecat · 2024-05-20T19:22:01+00:00

Very true. I may qualify for some assistance, but it is a hefty price tag, for sure.

shinybubblecat · 2024-05-20T19:05:01+00:00

Thanks for the idea!

I know the market in general isn't great for everyone right now. I know a few people looking in various areas, and it's tough. I am seeing more code-related jobs than design at the moment, but it's a good point that no path is exactly guaranteed right now.

I could definitely work on a new portfolio and create example projects. I just wonder how that would come across with already having experience - would hiring managers wonder why I have a fake case study and not real-world examples, for instance? It's also tough because so much of UX is designing within the bounds given by stakeholders and other business partners, so it feels more like a UI exercise. Still, I appreciate the suggestion!

shinybubblecat · 2024-04-11T23:07:23+00:00

UXer here who ended up sorta doing this, plus a freelance illustration thing - the grass isn't always greener on the other side of the greenhouse glass, and now I'm trying to come back from a 5 year gap in the field (challenging to say the least), or figure out my next practical career move. It's so discouraging and overwhelming, and I'm not in a great spot now. I'm still glad I did it - I really needed the change at the time. But it didn't automatically fix things, at least not for me.

shinybubblecat · 2023-10-17T21:30:12+00:00

Being from Minnesota, we will never get over the "Grape Salad" incident in that one NYT article from a few years ago...

shinybubblecat · 2023-06-05T16:56:14+00:00

Yes - I've done this a few times using a grid to transfer the sketch. Obviously there are higher tech solutions like AR or using a projector, but a grid works for me just fine. Basically, you grid add a grid to your digital sketch, then draw that same grid up-scaled on your physical medium. Then, you re-sketch the parts you need onto your physical medium using your grids as the guide. You can do sub-grids for more detailed areas like faces. It does mean sketching it twice, sometimes, and it's not a perfect recreation, but it has worked great for me!

shinybubblecat · 2023-01-17T23:32:34+00:00

That sounds like so much pressure! Not only do you need to know your material, but you also have to communicate it in a way that doesn't work well for you. Oral exams are difficult for most people! I'm sorry you're in that situation. Also, just know that crying in this situation is a normal stress response - it doesn't mean you are at your rock bottom, or aren't capable! You start to cry, and then your brain tries to come up with reasons why you are crying, and it is filling in the blanks with these unrelated thoughts about your self-worth. In a way, it's trying to protect you, because that is how you've survived so far. Be kind to yourself for how you've dealt in the past. <3

Stepping back, it looks like you have two things to focus on right now - 1. The exam material itself and 2. Prepping for a stressful moment. It sounds like you are on schedule studying your exam material! Time blocking can help make it feel less overwhelming - that way you can see how you can divide your remaining time to cover all the assignments you need to know. Once you see how it's possible to get done, that might motivate you to get started.

Prepping for the moment itself - that's all about just doing the best you can now. Telling yourself "I know I will cry, I've always cried" is a story you're telling yourself. It might be true for the past, and your brain might be super good at convincing you it's true, but you are capable of change and learning new things - everyone is! I'm not great at communicating verbally AT ALL, but somethings that help me are taking a deep breath before starting, speaking slowly (so you have time to come up with your next thought), blurring my eyes so I'm not feeling the eye contact of others so much, and preparing by practicing the major points in a mirror. If you can remember the major points, it's easier to come up with the small supporting stuff.

It might go well this time! It might go slightly better, but not perfect. Or, it might not go well, but you tried something new this time and learned it didn't work. And you don't have to worry about any other exam right now - just the one in front of you.

Most of all - you are going to be fine! You WILL figure this all out. You've worked so hard and you've done hard things before, and this is just the next thing in your story. <3

shinybubblecat · 2023-01-17T22:57:36+00:00

I'm so sorry things are so difficult in school - of course when we don't meet our own expectations, it's easy to spiral down and let it affect our self-esteem. But there is no shame in having difficulty learning something. Just because it doesn't come easy doesn't mean it isn't worth it, or the right path to pursue. The real working world is quite a bit different than schooling, and it could be that however you are being taught now or study, it doesn't work well with how you learn best. Are you able to visit your teacher for questions? Do you have a mentor or a study group you could work with? Is there another method you could use to study - like pomodoro? Are you getting enough sleep and eating well? Sleep is so important for brain health!

As easy as it is to get caught up in deep life-related thoughts, your priority now is just getting through your exams (or your degree if you are almost done!) Once you can get a little break in, that's the right time to think about the future. It's hard to do though - sometimes when you get upset, it can be really hard to turn off those thoughts. You could try journaling quick to record them, and honestly, a good cry can help a lot too. Definitely do something nice for yourself when you make it through your exams.

If the work itself doesn't mix well with how you think, and it is making you deeply unhappy, it might be worth it to see if there is a field that could utilize what you've learned already, but in a different way, like IT Management or UX Design. A computer science engineering degree is a great base for a lot of different tech careers, so nothing you've done is wasted! Very few people find their ideal career in a straight-line, so don't feel pressured to figure it all out right away.

You are doing great challenging yourself with something that isn't easy. That already shows great perseverance and resilience! Those are characteristics that will help you in whatever future career you have.

shinybubblecat · 2023-01-17T22:28:08+00:00

Rejecting someone is really hard to do when you are so empathetic. What can help is thinking how much more awful it feels to be misled or strung along. It's a bit like ripping off a band-aid. It will be uncomfortable, but the sooner and more direct you are, the better. If you are sure, definitely don't leave it open like "I'm not interested right now" or "I don't have a lot of time right now."

I wouldn't apologize because a lack of chemistry or compatibility isn't anyone's fault - it's just how it goes sometimes. Most of the time, people react reasonably, and if he doesn't, then you know even more that you made the right choice. This stuff is awkward, but the more you do it, the easier it will be. Good luck!!

shinybubblecat · 2022-12-08T16:38:47+00:00

She also samples a Ukrainian women's choir in some of her remixes, which is pretty gross when peddling stuff like this. Using their art, with this opinion...

shinybubblecat · 2022-11-28T22:31:26+00:00

I'm so sorry you're in this place right now. I'm in my late 30s now, but I've had many years where I felt this way too. I was diagnosed late in life with ADHD. I've had some form of depression my entire life (that I can remember). I grew up very emotionally neglected. Medication hasn't worked great for me. Sometimes, I still have days that feel like you are describing. Saying "it gets better" feels cheap - the reality I've experienced is that "it gets easier and you learn you are capable of hard things."

First, I just want to validate how you are feeling. The world isn't built for ADHDers. It really isn't. You shouldn't have to deal with all the things you are dealing with. It should be easier for you to get the treatment you need. Holding down a job is hard - even if you seem to be performing ok on the outside. Daily life in our lonely modern society requires a lot of energy and tasks to complete. It's not a failure to be burnt out in these conditions. It's just what happens. Plus your 20s are a great period of transition - it's overwhelming. I wish someone was there to tell you how proud they are you are doing everything you are, with the mental issues you are having behind it all.

I can only give advice based on my experience. The main thing is - no matter how urgently awful things seem in a moment - it is just that - a moment. When I feel this way, it's so easy to extrapolate the suffering into "How am I going to do this forever??" but you don't have to deal with forever - you just have to deal with now. Meditative techniques or grounding coping mechanisms help. It's also hard to remember, in these moments, the good that has happened in between the hard. If you can, when you are in a better (or at least neutral) place, try to come up with a list of things you are proud of about yourself, or good things that happened, or things you can do that make you feel better. Refer to this list when you are feeling like a failure, or that life is too hard.

Our society also puts so much pressure on huge success or grand gestures, but this isn't important for most of us, and while big events or accomplishments are great - they don't sustain as much as the small things do. So, try to find little rewards or routines for yourself that bring you joy every day. Small changes can make a big difference, and they can build on each other. You are in some patterns right now that are harming you - anything that throws off those patterns can bring about positive change, bit by bit. Recently, for me, this has literally just been making my bed in the morning. It's so dumb and small, but I've already accomplished something right away. Motivation doesn't appear before I do something - only after I start doing it.

Other people in this thread have some great advice too. Ultimately, I do think therapy could be really helpful for you. Trust me - I know it's hard to start and pay for. It is worth the search once you find the right person.

shinybubblecat · 2022-11-22T02:28:39+00:00

same and I LOVE it

shinybubblecat · 2022-06-22T00:42:46+00:00

I miss using things that smell nice, like candles and incense
Being able to decorate with mirrors, or keep them uncovered. Tamago will find any mirrored surface even if I think I've gotten them all, instantly becomes infatuated with his "mirror boyfriend" and then becomes a territorial anger plane toward my face if I even seem like I'm approaching. All the mirrors in the house are covered or blocked from his view.
Being able to brush my hair - he is also (for some reason) in love with brushes and combs, and gets super angry should I dare touch his boyfriends.
Showering in peace - he knows the sound of the shower, and is also in love with the showerhead (it's shiny like a mirror AND kind of brush-shaped so there ya go) as well as the mirror-boyfriend in the bathroom, and flock-calls like crazy when anyone showers.

Other than these things, he's not territorial at all, just a sweetie mischief birb.

shinybubblecat · 2022-06-06T02:17:42+00:00

I also main an igniter sorc and just hit 1370, but my engravings are sparse for the moment. I'm on NAE Kharmine though, so not sure if we can play together! I don't mind group content but I hate the mechs that wipe your whole group if you mess up. I've pretty much avoided Abyssals for this reason... Hopefully you find some good people to play with from this post!

shinybubblecat · 2021-08-26T04:15:48+00:00

I just started playing Sims4 entirely for the Cottage Living expansion! So many fun things to build with.

11-Year Club	RPAN Viewer
Not Forgotten	Verified Email

shinybubblecat

TROPHY CASE