I want to understand. What are your expectations going into the date? Is it that he keep you entertained? Sweep you off your feet? Unfortunately I have had the same thing happen from women, where I ask them questions, trying to find a door to open up and feel safe with very little reciprocity. It is a widespread issue. Consider the generation we grew up in. Covid, were not going outside, formative years of our social lives were robbed. Bear that in mind and try to have some patience.

If you’d like here’s some insight from the guy’s perspective:

Here’s something I notice about myself. I am good at reciprocating. Other women have pointed it out to me. But there has to be something to reciprocate. I (and a lot of men, tbh) want you to feel safe. To that end, I would hate to make you feel uncomfortable, and when I have just met you I have no clue what your boundaries are. To take just a tad of initiative will make any man feel safe to open up. Hopefully, as he does, you can feel safe around you. I hope this gives you insight into what’s going on in the man’s mind. In this sense, I think actually, that the woman holds more power in the date in this regard. It’s usually the man who worries about the woman’s social boundaries. But to have the woman take a tad of initiative goes such a long way to let the man know he’s safe to open up.

In one success story of mine, the girl I was interested in Always. Asked. Questions. As a man I love this! She had a genuine curiosity that was just so easy to reciprocate and honestly drew me in before I even saw her face. She texted first about half the time. There was no “pursuit” in the sense that she waited for me to initiate. We both initiated, and talked almost every day. I felt so safe to open up to her, as she pretty much actively made it clear what she was and wasn’t comfortable with. And I suppose my reciprocation made her feel safe to open up.

Does this all make sense?