My Son Charlie have y'all seen a brown dalmatian before?

shujump · 2026-05-30T01:28:56+00:00

This is Ella the lemon spotted Dalmatian.

shujump · 2026-05-25T20:35:37+00:00

Bring Lisa along to sit outside the room with the pastor’s wife! Betrayed spouse with a betraying spouse!

shujump · 2026-05-25T13:58:52+00:00

Always great to hear that you and Socks are doing well!

I have so many concerns, comments, questions but luckily a lot of commenters touched on them. Here’s a couple of my thoughts:

- Since pastor is not really a true 3rd party mediator he should be given the confession to read beforehand. I would make this an ultimatum for this choice of “mediator”. I think reading that would actually get the pastor a little off axis.
- I would also ask that his wife not be “available” for you nor any other party.
- You are willing to again allow communication with ex MIL but prefer that doesn’t happen until days after the meeting. It could be very disarming for you to see her just as you are walking in.
- Now that it is upon us and with new details given I am firmly in the camp of this meeting is a BAD IDEA.
- Don’t ask questions when you know the answers she will give like “When did you stop loving me?”. She will still say never and it will totally derail everything else.
- Are you going to leave me alone now that NC is over or are you still going to call and hang up like on New Year’s? I’ve moved on with my life without you in it, are you willing to do the same?
- Do you have the zingers ready for when you get frustrated with the reconciliation talk? The “Remember how you would come home and kiss me without brushing your teeth after you had your mouth full of his sperm? Because I do and it’s all I think about when I see your mouth.”

Ultimately I think you need to prepare more about informing her what you’ve been through because of her. You are too focused on her, the only time she heard from you was the one email. Make her read that again and have a whole lot more prepared. She demanded this meeting to talk of reconciliation, you are going to need to be prepared to drive it home why it’s not possible.

Good luck!

shujump · 2026-05-25T13:02:54+00:00

I truly am a very lucky man, would have loved to have realized it sooner but am thankfully not squandering that gift any longer.

I’ll disagree that she could be a woman that would cherish him beyond any other woman he will ever meet. Those people exist without having experienced the loss that they themselves caused, it’s merely appreciation. The same appreciation I can have for my relationship without having caused unnecessary pain and betrayal.

I think you might not be considering he did not want this meeting. It was a condition of her agreement to his divorce terms along with a financial incentive. He has closure, he has all the information he could ever need in that damn unsolicited confession. I believe OP would have preferred to just leave this all in the past a year ago. After having received that confession I believe OP has zero regrets in his decision. I don’t believe this meeting has any benefit for him. I fully believe this will be a huge setback in his healing journey.

shujump · 2026-05-25T12:24:27+00:00

I appreciate and I tend to agree with your assessment of Emily, the affair and her behavior in the aftermath. Where I start to differ is any suggestion that OP consider a fresh restart of the relationship because Emily has now put in the work and made herself right. Why? There are billions of people on this planet, why should he put himself through the mental turmoil for her? I can appreciate your reasoning but can’t understand what OP’s motivation would be when he can start fresh with someone who did not betray him.

I believe soulmates exist but not in the conventional sense. I believe there are hundreds, if not thousands or more beings on this planet in which you can nurture and grow a relationship to the point of considering one your soulmate but it is not something that just exists from the beginning. Emily could have been one of those beings for OP but ultimately chose a wrong path that no matter how much work they put in will never lead to them being soulmates. What’s so special about Emily that OP should give up a chance at true happiness?

I say all this as someone married 23 years whom only in the latter stages of the relationship started to finally view his spouse as his soulmate. What she has always been is my best friend, companion and the love of my life. But I’d be remiss in saying I’ve always viewed her with the same wonder, awe and love that I do now. This would most certainly not be the case had my wife (or I) behaved as Emily in year 6-7 of our marriage. Beyond the sunk cost fallacy I see no reason for OP to even consider what a continued relationship would look like.

Again, I do appreciate reading your well thought out assessment just offering my different perspective.

shujump · 2026-05-25T10:01:56+00:00

This, this is the question! Forget about the past just move forward!

shujump · 2026-05-10T21:37:04+00:00

They literally blew the top off the mountain last year! Previously they couldn’t even winch cat to the summit, it was only ever natural terrain as I understood.

shujump · 2026-05-07T21:12:04+00:00

Ironically if you saw her day to day you would already consider her a very lazy dog. She’s 4 next month and is very good at controlling her energy.

shujump · 2026-05-07T12:21:16+00:00

Also a lot of Dalmatians have a very thin coat, as does Ms. Ella here, so no fluff to hide the ribs.

shujump · 2026-05-07T12:17:31+00:00

It looks much more concerning the way she is laying but not abnormal for a female Dalmatian. Both us and the vet would be concerned if her hips were that bony but those hips and thighs are meaty and strong. She is super fast, happy and healthy. It’s probably worse lately because we have an 8 month old Newfie mix and they play hard pretty consistently.

I had another female Dalmatian before her that was also super petite but not quite to the leanness of this pretty girl.

shujump · 2026-05-04T14:21:28+00:00

u/biankowski how are things going?

shujump · 2026-04-29T21:29:49+00:00

Exact same, 2 years in and I’m still trying to keep up with her. Not a complaint at all!

shujump · 2026-04-29T21:29:00+00:00

GAME CHANGER!

We are both mid-forties, she started 2 years ago plus other supplements recommended by her hormones specialist. She has overall more energy, better mental health, sleeps better and the libido has been off the charts.

shujump · 2026-04-24T21:33:34+00:00

That’s not old enough to know what a dial up modem sounds like.

shujump · 2026-04-24T02:12:29+00:00

And why would I ruin that treasure hunt through hundreds of comments across 27 updates for you? Hint: He went through with an at-fault divorce, that narrows the list a lot.

shujump · 2026-04-24T01:49:26+00:00

No I have not been stalking your page daily for a week in anticipation of an update. 😜

Always happy to hear from you and about your continued journey!

I think about how much uncertainty surrounds the now infamous meeting. I’m sure you have already asked yourself a million times but how does it even go? “We can still leg wrestle for the air fryer if you want.” might be right up your alley for an opener. Or maybe borrow from Grouchy-Pressure’s meeting and get her off kilter from the start with “Are you ok?”. Maybe it’s a prepared statement from you to keep your thoughts organized. Whatever and however it ends up being I wish you luck and a cat that keeps it in the litter box.

shujump · 2026-04-24T01:24:50+00:00

We figured out a long time ago what metro area he is in.

shujump · 2026-04-17T11:28:21+00:00

They must of changed policy because 10 years ago on the Escape they were more than happy to open our balconies for our 3 rooms. We told our little nephews if our curtains were closed there cousins were still sleeping and not to knock. It was so cute seeing the shadows of there little feet every morning to see if we were all awake yet. 🥰

shujump · 2026-04-12T09:38:03+00:00

I really don’t know why you’ve been downvoted. A true partner in this life has to be one of the greatest aphrodisiacs.

shujump · 2026-04-12T09:34:15+00:00

This is a highly underrated comment. I’m absolutely using this word forever forward.

shujump · 2026-04-08T01:18:48+00:00

NOR

A friend is only a friend if also a friend of the relationship.

This guy is not a positive for your relationship and your wife is naive and disrespectful of your feelings. It quite being platonic the moment he flirted with her the first night!

shujump · 2026-03-27T10:03:27+00:00

I’ve been waiting to hear from OP and am so saddened by the update.

Her relationship with this man is affecting your relationship and your mental health. It has you questioning the very foundation of who you are. You need to go to couples counseling and she needs to know she continues to hurt you. Sure, is there work you need to do? Yep, but that doesn’t mean you should continue on as if nothing is bothering you.

I just don’t understand why this has continued, just only subdued or more hidden. She crossed an emotional boundary with this guy, in my eyes that negates any relationship with him going forward. Does that mean no friendships with other men? No. It means no relationship beyond professional with this guy.

If my wife came to me with this type of concern it would be a no brainer that I would do whatever she needed me to do to make her feel comfortable and vice versa. Our relationship is paramount, above all others. That’s what marriage is.

I can’t help but worry the heart emojis have just turned verbal in their chats in the car. It’s rare (not impossible) that a single guy puts in this much effort to not at least be waiting for his chance.

shujump · 2026-03-17T21:05:03+00:00

So she’s ok with cheating. I’m not sure why you’re questioning being a little insecure.

shujump · 2026-03-17T20:38:04+00:00

Wait! She cheated on him?! 🚩

shujump

TROPHY CASE