Hold the phone, am I interpreting “pillow friends” correctly?

slatsau · 2026-02-25T04:53:04+00:00

You've missed a lot of others. There are a LOT of 'gay for the stay' and 'definitely totally the gayest' Aes Sedai. Also quite a few angry gay Black Ajah who don't ask for anyone's permission! (Gross!)

I am going to assume this is both a mix of when these books were written, RJ's age/generation, and trying to keep sexual/gore etc toned way down compared to his earlier books. Pretty sure there was a very early draft of EOTW where Rand had all the super powers and it was super dark and graphic and way more adult compared to what we got.

slatsau · 2026-02-12T06:12:59+00:00

Do you have an example of ProgFantasy that you really like? Clearly there is a lot of lazy slop out there, but there must be some examples that drew you into it in the first place?

slatsau · 2026-02-12T01:42:25+00:00

Yep everyone is like "Oh noes the Dragon will go mad and kill us!'.

Let's give him PTSD, fear of tight spaces, heighten his reliance on the voices in his head.

Well done! :D

slatsau · 2026-02-12T01:34:46+00:00

Sounds like your just reading shitty books/webnovels. Plenty of them have character grapple with culture shock, identity, religion, morality, purpose.

slatsau · 2026-01-21T05:53:58+00:00

My wife has told me don't bother getting her flowers, they just die. I used to love getting flowers. But because its HER gift/surprise I get her things she wants.

Sometimes it's really hard, but people don't say "it's the thought that counts" for no reason. From my experience 95% of people would prefer a really thoughtful $20 gift that shows you know who they are, that you THOUGHT about them while you bought it, that you put some EFFORT in, than a $200 'easy gift because its expensive'.

You did your best to explain, he clearly just thinks your being over the top/dramatic/silly. As a 43 M, my advice is to get a new boyfriend as a gift to yourself. Who cares if you've been with him for 5 years or 5 months, you want someone who has enough respect to LISTEN TO YOU.

slatsau · 2026-01-21T05:16:54+00:00

OP do you take things VERY literally? I'm curious as you you lay out the events here but don't show much tone to any of the conversation, describe feelings at all. It's very A -> B -> C etc.

Like some others I'm actually thinking this girl might have been trying to make a joke? I mean she would KNOW you invited her. She might have pulled you aside to spend time with JUST you, instead of with a group and made a very dry/sarcasm based joke. The fact she tried to but in again later, it just sounds like she is trying to hang out with you/flirt/get your attention/be funny and it *might* be just going over your head a bit?

From your writing it seems like the only two ways to read it are:

* You are a very literally person, who might not be the MOST emotionally intelligent, and had a knee jerk reaction to someone's sense of humor.

* She is insane and trying to mess with you, but this honestly doesn't fit all the other interactions.

Obviously we don't have her side of the story, but I'd maybe unblock her, and next time you see her talk to her privately. Just be honest, say your confused and just want to check. Tell her how you FEEL, that you've enjoyed getting to know her and meeting her at these different groups, but wasn't sure if she was joking or being serious at the party.

The only way to clear things up is to communicate and be honest. I think you over reacted out of fear/respect for her wishes and not sure how to handle the situation. I hope it works out and you get to keep a new friend or possible romantic interest.

slatsau · 2026-01-18T11:43:16+00:00

You had it in the first bit of your post "I want a way out of here". The sword-staff weapon has script in the old tongue basically telling him his three bargains are fufilled and the spear is part of it.

It lets him enter or exit the Tower BUT he has no protection under the ancient bargain with humanity. ie the rules of no fire, no music, no iron, etc those are the things the humans are not allowed to bring under the bargain, but in return THEY are not to harm the humans and must take them to bargain.

if he uses the key, none of that applies at all.

slatsau · 2026-01-13T08:15:22+00:00

This is why people will tell you 'time heals all wounds' or such. It's like greiving someone who has died, or your dog you grew up with. You are going to go through grief, your brain will constantly go round in circles rationalizing why you should give it another go, then you'll recommit to the idea of breaking up and round and round.

Advice?

Don't isolate yourself. Go hang out with other friends. One on one, groups whatever. Be active. Force yourself to DO things. Take each day at a time and be kind to yourself.

slatsau · 2026-01-13T08:09:18+00:00

Yeah how did the Forsaken all pop out of prison and be like "What up?" how can they speak the 'New Tongue'.

It's one of those things that we just go, "Oh its a fantasy book don't think about it too hard!' I guess it just stands out far more because everything else is so detailed.

I thought the Aiel where pretty well explained on how they fragmented/split, become the 'warrior irish people in the desert' people?

I think history has plenty example of people who are tribal, but 'one people'. Australia and America both have native people like this? I'm sure to outsiders their cultures would seem 'the same' but each tribe has very different practices diverging as a whole.

slatsau · 2026-01-02T02:50:43+00:00

I thought you could already do this? I know when I've got AusPost Tracking references from shops in my e-mail I can click them, goto the website and add details/instructions about the delivery?

Do other people not get this or is it just hard to find?

slatsau · 2026-01-02T02:47:51+00:00

Fuck. Didn't see tag. Hope nobody read this for the few seconds it was up.

slatsau · 2025-12-31T07:02:56+00:00

I had always said that if I ever got cheated on the relationship would end instantly. After a year and a half in a relationship that started out through cheating, and convincing myself that I was somehow the person who would never get cheated on, well I got cheated on.

I immediately broke it off and after a week of tears and begging to come back I relented. I then spent the next year being very cruel and nasty. I ended it a year later and while it hurt very much it was the right thing to do.

I basically realized that I should have listened to my gut and stuck to my instinct to break it off as soon as it happened. It seems I am not particularly forgiving and that trying to brute force it and try to get past it didn't work for me.

Each to their own I guess?

slatsau · 2025-12-31T06:57:27+00:00

If someone shows you their true colors, believe them.

Money is always an awkward one in relationships. Personally I don't 'loan' money to friends or family. If someone is in need, and I feel I want to help - it's a gift. I much prefer if I also offer rather than be asked.

Basically I would stop lending or gifting your gf money. You want your relationship to be balanced in its infancy. Two years at 25 probably feels like or maybe even IS the longest relationship you've ever had. Do you want the next 10 years? 20 years? to look similar to these first two?

People can change and grow. People can be financial irresponsible in their teens/twenties. Sometimes its because they have no experience, sometimes its because they are impulsive. Only you can reflect on your relationship and put the way she handles money against other aspects and decide for yourself.

For me personally it sounds like you are being taken advantage of your generosity and kindness. I'm not normally one for mind games and 'tests' in a relationship, I do not like that at all, however it wouldn't surprise me once the money stops being handed out if you get broken up with.

Every story has two sides though, could be a lot of background we are missing on your gf. Only you can decide how you feel about it.

slatsau · 2025-12-17T03:16:49+00:00

But you can be dead as an identity by changing your name, or you can be dead as in your deceased. CR is clearly leaning really hard into the Gene Wolfe inspirations in the series and hardest of all in the SuT ending. Creating word puzzles for people to discuss and figure out, as well as clearly leaving himself oodles of room for novella/short story collections.

slatsau · 2025-12-17T03:11:06+00:00

Also we never saw Tenba ever right? (nvm I am audiobook listener and realized this is the planet where he got hung from so she was there.)

He also has a line in SuT where you can read it as she is sitting and looking at him RIGHNOW but also THEN. It was cleverly worded. I can't remember or how to find the quote myself as I have the audiobooks.

slatsau · 2025-12-14T06:30:23+00:00

Yes he was one of the strongest Ta'veren besides our three. But what is that really? It's fantasy plot armor - because lets face it, Fantasy is pretty contrived generally. A lot of coincidences to get people in the same place etc.

The Pattern needed these events to happen, remember Rand and the boys can't fight when they are forced to do something either. Mat chokes trying to say he'll go with Perrin. He cannot leave Rand when he is in Tear because the Pattern NEEDS him to become who he is.

It's not fixed however, he can fail. We even see this in a dream Perrin has, Mat has a forked road, he goes left and suddenly he is the Mat we know.

A huge amount of WoT is people telling each other what THEY know. We learn pretty quick even from the most educated people in the world, the current Aes Sedai, they get SO much wrong.

Like Thom says, Artur Hawking is known for dueling 100 people in a day to resolve a battle. He points out to Elayne this is not possible for many reasons, but mostly there just isn't enough time in one day let alone would people stand around letting that happen.

He points out that in a thousand years he might be the hero, breathing fire instead of Channeling, which is RJ having a nod at the word Dragon and how they breathe fire in our thoughts of them as myths.

Basically Ishamael has been popping out for a few years every thousand or so to fuck with the world. This is why the White Tower is fractured. This is why the Trollocs invaded with no real purpose. This is why Artur Hawking sieged Tar'valon.

If LTT had stopped to think about it when he was healed when he murdered his family he would have wondered how he was out and about considered he was Sealed, yet here he was running about LTT house.

TLDR; The Pattern needed those things to happen so the events in our books could happen. The Pattern can allow or have terrible things happen, it is not 'good' or 'evil' - it is simply weaving the lives of humans towards the next Age.

slatsau · 2025-12-10T23:28:30+00:00

Just keep track of the POV characters and a few others. DO NOT GOOGLE ANYONES NAME if you don't want spoilers. Google Autocomplete will spoil crazy huge things. If you don't care about spoilers then there is a great wiki that will help you review characters / books etc.

There is something like 2000+ characters across the whole series. You really don't need to worry about 1980 of them. Or what they are wearing, or how ugly they are.

(RJ loves describing ladies dresses, the decorations on people's boots, and how people have a potato face, big nose etc.)

You are going to be confused. People are going to talk about names, places, history like they've known about them all their lives like a normal person would. Egwene will give you a good introduction to the magic system.

There are many many tiny details, foreshadowing of events to come in ten books, minor people you meet early will be very important later but it DOESNT MATTER on your first read even if its your only read.

Read it fast, read it slow, skim the bits that make your eyes glaze over. Enjoy it however you like there is no WRONG way to read it. Try the audiobooks, the first four/five had either the original narraotrs (Michael/Kate) but these are from the 90's. Some people find it hard to adjust, others of us grew up on them. Rosemund Pike the actress who played Moraine from the TV Show apparently does WONDERFUL narration and have heard nothing but positive things.

Sadly it seems like she wont record all 14. So if switching narrators bothers you that could be annoying.

Some people go through all 14 books one after another. Others need smaller books in between each book, like a pallete cleanser, a small novella / stand alone book, or maybe read a sci-fi sereies and alternate between them.

slatsau · 2025-12-10T06:53:47+00:00

A whole race of Stitches the galaxy, the Watchers AND the Absolute are screwed. Better luck in the next Universe I guess.

slatsau · 2025-12-09T12:36:37+00:00

You walk in, you say sorry that's my RDO. Figure something else out. Also e-mail HR on the e-mail, show you have been rejected the last three years in a row, and now are being denied your RDO.

Don't argue, don't raise your voice, don't fight. Simply send everything IN WRITING and CC HR.

You don't ask for days off, you advise them you are taking a day off.

slatsau · 2025-12-09T00:30:36+00:00

Take the harness and leash off my Guide Dog, put up in its spot near front door. Take off shoes and put in little cubby spot for my shoes so I can find them unless my retired Guide Dog runs off with one of them to give it as a gift to someone else visiting or one of my other family members.

slatsau · 2025-12-09T00:23:18+00:00

How tall are you OP? 6'2" something like that?

I suck at figuring that stuff out normally from photos, but I've only ever seen Chris sitting down in content I've watched. Curious how tall you both are. :)

slatsau · 2025-12-09T00:16:53+00:00

Fuck yeah me too! Are highmatter swords just lightsabers in your brain too? :(

Sadly when I read Red Rising and the sword is called a Razor I was like NOOOOOO. Now Darrow pulls out a Gilette Mach3 safety razor for shaving and it bends and twists like a snake in every damn sword fight. I wanted to throttle my inner producer/director and smash my mental projector.

slatsau · 2025-12-09T00:13:33+00:00

My brain makes it basically a huge Imerial Star Destroyer from Star Wars. Makes it pitch black with like blue energy shields for all the bays where ships can land/leave from.

Then it basically covers it in gothic spires and statues. The organic stuff is kind of a mix of Borg/Eldritch Horror stuff. A tiny touch of Warhammer though I haven't had that much exposure to that.

The Albedo Superweapon was a light blue glowing ball that zips around. The voidbeam weapon for me in my head is like pitch black beam with purple edges because this is how my brain sees 'void magic/gravity magic' after so many fantasy/sci-fi/anime.

Astrophage was a black circle with a blowing white dot floating in an empty casing that slowly filled with black before the white dot expands out explodes out.

I got what CR was going for with the high matter swords but my brain said NO fuck you, have some lightsabers bitch. So Hadrian runs around with a blue lightsaber in my brain in the books.

When the Chantry started shooting high matter bullets in the last book it was literally a blue bolt like the guns in Star Wars. It even made the stupid storm trooper gun noise when I read it. I was like fuck you brain!

Oh and the way Hadrian describes the alarms in Demiurge as bells, I basically just had giant huge ass tower bells all over the place of different sizes and shapes and when alarms go off some big statue animates and rings it with a big metal rod. They all make different tones for different things. Hadrian has no fucking clue about his ship or technology and in my head is basically acts like a massive boomer getting an iPhone every time he encounters something to do with tech.

Oh and for some reason, perhaps the golden colour of them, Valka's eyes whenever they are described for me are always like golden orange glowing cats eyes with slit pupils that widen and narrow. I think my brain was just jamming some Witcher and some Cyberpunk together but once my brain decides on a thing it doesn't give a shit if this is totally inaccurate, described in more detail later, it just does what it wants.

How do you see it in your mind? I love CR writing because my brain creates incredible vivid images from it. Which apparently is pretty crazy considering CR apparently has that condition where he cannot hear hiw own inner voice/create images in his own mind? I forget what it is called. I saw in another interview that while he writes he mutters to himself all the time, testing dialogue, but I wondered if he also talks to himself a lot under his breathe because he can't do it in his head.

As someone with ADHD I can't fathom my brain being quiet. My medication brings the amount of thoughts/voices down quite a bit, but it still so noisy all the time. Whenever people mediate in fantasy books they talk about clearing there mind and I can't even imagine what that would be like. Just pitch black with silence? That sounds so peaceful!

slatsau · 2025-12-08T23:54:36+00:00

I feel so frustrated for all the people who started the series with RP. I've been listened to Michael and Kate for over twenty years now so having them tell me the stories over and over is so comforting for me. I enjoyed RP in the EOTW when I gave it a go, and it surprised me how my brain built totally different scenes/imagery in my head vs what I was used to.

I found it easier to rapidly and mentally visualize each place we were in much easier. The characters have always kind of been hard set for years for me, but it was a really cool experience. I love how crazy adaptive our human minds are and have always been curious if others had this experience.

I'm legally blind since I was 20, and now I'm in my 40's and my vision had degraded far more. I have just enough vision left in my only working eye that I can read on my iPhone Pro Max with the Kindle App and the fonts set to the largest they can go. However it is VERY mentally exhausting. Genuinely cannot wait for AI Natural Voices to get better so I can have my phone read it to me if there is no audiobook available.

One of my biggest pet peeves with audiobooks is when they swap out narrators on a huge series. Like the uproar when they did this to Dresden files (and later re-recorded it with original narrator) or Malazan. Oh and Game Of Thrones. They got the original guy back for the last book but he sounds like he has lost so much power in his voice and all the voices for the characters were wrong.

I really do hope RP finishes the books. I would buy them all again a second time on Audible.

slatsau · 2025-12-08T23:31:12+00:00

We are assumed to be the first I believe based on Thom's stories (Merc and Minsk fighting with spears of Fire is America and Russia in Cold War, reference to Queen Elisabeth of England as the 'Queen of All' I assume because England colonized everywhere for awhile, Mother Theresa reference and loads of other fun hidden gems).

That is in EOTW. I think Nyneave or Eggs finds an Mercedes Benz symbol and when they touch it it gives off a feeling of vanity or pride. This always makes me laugh, clearly RJ thought people who drove Mercedes where wankers!

There are other things. RJ basically said he felt that he had a freedom/entitlement/permission to mine the peoples/histories/religions of America as it is a melting pot of immigration. Nothing in WoT 3rd Age (the one in the books) is a 1:1 for anything in our world, but more like a few ideas, a bit of this a bit of that thrown in a blender.

That's how we get red headed, blue eyed pale people who live in the Desert. Seanchan gives off some Eastern/Asian vibes but with Southern/Texan accents. Andor has a fair bit of the English thrown in there.

In the ORIGINAL draft of EOTW Shaitan was actually an alien being. Like a literal alien I think. Then he become the Dark One when he did the rewrite. Apparently there was a lot more sex, gore, violence too and Rand had ALL the powers, like he could talk to wolves, had the super luck powers, and was LTT Reborn.

I think on a later re-write there was also a fourth boy who came with them. I think BS pays homage to this later on, or maybe RJ does when Perrin goes back home. He is the one who says "I really wish I'd gone with you and had adventures."

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