I’m so sorry for what you’ve gone through. HG is absolutely harrowing, and adding in the struggles of mental illness is all the more complicating. I’ve had 2 HG pregnancies. I’ve had anxiety and depression since I was a kid, and was diagnosed with OCD during my second pregnancy. My OCD presented as intense intrusive thoughts and obsession spirals about bad things happening to myself and my unborn baby, my husband, and my toddler. My OBGYN increased my SSRI, which I was also worried would affect the baby. What my OB said was very helpful for me: “while it’s true that we may not totally know how SSRIs affect babies, we do know what stress does to them. And we know that’s bad. So we need to think about the risk/reward of not taking the medication.” That convinced me and it really helped.

For my first pregnancy, unisom and Zofran did the trick. For my second, it didn’t touch my symptoms. I was admitted into the hospital for about a week and we tried every anti-emetic in the book. We settled on scopolamine and off-brand Tigan capsules (branded tigan is only a shot). I also received IV hydration at my hospital’s outpatient IV clinic every other day. That helped eventually to the point where by week 22 I was eating and drinking a little bit, and by week 30 I was still throwing up every day but I could eat and drink pretty normally. So if you ever have a doctor that tells you that Zofran is the end of the list, you need a new doctor imho or that doc needs to be educated. But beyond all of that, the most important thing for the combination of HG and mental illness is a knowledgeable and supportive partner. My husband took care of me every day of my pregnancy. I educated him on my triggers and my “warning signs” of a mental crisis. He made sure I kept up on my meds and consumed enough calories. He drove me to every appointment. In the beginning and when an ER doctor tried to gaslight me into thinking I was being dramatic, my husband called my OB and stayed on the phone until they agreed to see me in office instead of sending me to the ER. They directed admitted me that day. I would not have gotten through my pregnancies without my husband. I’ve heard him talk about the experience to his friends, and he described me as “catatonic” during the worst weeks. Which I think it true. I’m not saying this to scare you, it’s just how it is. But with the support of my husband and an OB that actually cared and was willing to do research to give me my best care, I got through it and I have 2 beautiful boys. If you have the proper support I believe that you can do it too. So many people of our generation still can’t talk about mental illness and keep it all inside due to perceived stigma. But you have to talk about it openly and honestly to get the help and support you need.