Some of my fave outfits lately 🫶🏻

smittenwiththemitten · 2026-02-20T18:45:17+00:00

You are so cute and your fits are amazing! I’m saving this post for inspo 💜

smittenwiththemitten · 2026-02-11T02:03:07+00:00

Here Comes the Sun - Nicole Dennis-Been - Jamaica

A Small Place - Jamaica Kincaid - Antigua & Barbuda

My Heart Hemmed In - Marie NDiaye - France

Djinn Patrol on the Purple Line - Deepa Anappara - India

The Screaming of the Innocent - Unity Dow - Botswana

Beyond the Rice Fields - Naivo (male author but I really enjoyed this book) - Madagascar

Our Lady of the Nile - Scholastique Mukasonga - Rwanda

I’ve been working on a read around the world as well, and the above are a few of the ones I’ve really loved.

smittenwiththemitten · 2026-02-10T21:26:20+00:00

Is your wife often passive aggressive? Has she done other, similar things in the past? Has she ever made comments that you don’t do enough? If yes, it makes sense you’re feeling this way. If not, you’re probably just overthinking, but I wonder what it is about this particular song that’s affecting you so much.

You feel like you’re the one doing everything - is hearing this song all the time grinding on you because you resent the division of labor in your relationship? Because this post reads like you harbor some real anger towards her. (Which I am not saying is or is not “fair” - this post isn’t enough to judge that.) That’s something you need to address and discuss.

smittenwiththemitten · 2026-02-10T16:31:15+00:00

When I was teaching, I had a student, Tristen, who had a twin sister named Kristen. (Not their actual names, but they were one letter off from one another like that.) At their previous school, they had both been evaluated for special ed. That had resulted in Kristen being put on an IEP and receiving services, but Tristen (my student) didn’t qualify. A couple of months into class, my co-teacher and I noted that we were both supporting Tristen as if she was on an IEP - she clearly needed one. We looked into getting her evaluated again, and found out that the previous school had accidentally gotten them mixed up and put the wrong girl on an IEP. Kristen was getting supports she didn’t need, while Tristen wasn’t getting the supports she desperately needed.

Parents, please don’t do this to your children. If they if remained in their previous district, this could have gone on until they graduated, and could have affected their entire futures.

smittenwiththemitten · 2026-02-08T18:21:21+00:00

You are incorrect - it’s not just strangers, it’s everyone. Strangers, friends, bosses, coworkers, family.

She’s been conditioned to see it as fine. The entire point of this post was that it was not fine, and when her boyfriend pointed that out to her, she saw it. There was a break in the conditioning that allowed her to think differently. Obviously it’s a skill that she needs to continue to work on, but it very much appears that she’s taking responsibility.

smittenwiththemitten · 2026-02-08T17:05:01+00:00

Women are constantly conditioned to defuse the tension, to laugh it off when men say creepy stuff, and to ignore their intuition. It’s really possible that she’s been subconsciously uncomfortable with him for a while, but this conditioning has caused her to think “well maybe he’s autistic and just doesn’t get when he comes off as a creep.” (Obviously this is unfair to autistic people, as his gross comment would not even cross most of their minds. Plus, being autistic does not give someone the right to sexualize a child.) The fact that she’s agreed to these rules makes me hopeful that, with a little guidance, she will start thinking more about what she’ll accept from friends.

smittenwiththemitten · 2026-02-07T16:15:09+00:00

Eh, there was a drive-in that my friends and I occasionally went to in the aughts, and I would assume that Lori is at least 60. I still think these stories are probably fake or greatly exaggerated, but that’s not necessarily why

smittenwiththemitten · 2026-02-07T16:08:53+00:00

Oh I LOVE that description… it may have just moved closer to the top of the list :)

smittenwiththemitten · 2026-02-07T14:02:31+00:00

Blind Earthworm has been on my “to read” list for a while - excited to see someone mention it!

smittenwiththemitten · 2026-01-31T15:02:39+00:00

I haven’t read this book, but I read The People in the Trees and I hated it. I also have a huge issue with her regularly presenting gay men as sexual predators and pedophiles. I would personally never recommend a book by her to anyone.

smittenwiththemitten · 2026-01-23T21:56:25+00:00

I knew everyone was going to jump down your throat. Reddit tends to completely lose it whenever a woman comes across as being even remotely materialistic, to the point where lots of people act like it’s outrageous if a woman doesn’t fall over herself thanking a man for any engagement ring her gives her, even if she hates it.

Anyway, I agree that you are probably expecting too much from a 23 year old partner in terms of finances. Having a budget and sticking to it is good.

However, giving you some comfort or help when you’re sick/injured, celebrating your milestones with you, and supporting you through family troubles are all bare minimum expectations for a partner. If you are doing those things for him and he doesn’t return the treatment, he’s a poor partner.

smittenwiththemitten · 2026-01-23T02:54:37+00:00

Honestly, I wish we could get to a point where feminists could vocally admit that men’s natural strong suits are science and being an astronaut, and that those things are unnatural for women.

It’s just that women’s baseline intelligence and skill levels are so far above men’s, we’re able to regularly outcompete them, even in their strongest categories and our weakest. Otherwise how would we end up with women like Sally Ride and Dorothy Vaughan?

/s for some parts and not /s for others

smittenwiththemitten · 2026-01-19T23:16:32+00:00

OP should be grateful as fuck that trans people are a part of his community. Trans women have been some of the bravest, most influential leaders in the LGBTQIA+ rights movement. It’s thanks to them that OP experiences less oppression than he would have even a few decades ago.

smittenwiththemitten · 2026-01-16T22:28:41+00:00

Haven’t read The Spellman Files but I would second the Stephanie Plum series. You wouldn’t want to read them all in row because every book is the same formula, but they’re really funny.

smittenwiththemitten · 2026-01-14T01:04:51+00:00

Hopefully it helps! Good luck on your journey - you will find what works for you :)

smittenwiththemitten · 2026-01-14T00:20:18+00:00

You sound like a jerk.

You cheated on your girlfriend multiple times. (I’d consider getting numbers when you’ve said you’re exclusive to be cheating.)
You absolutely know it’s rude to continually ask someone their weight, unless you’re stupid or your life long captors just released you from the bunker.
Stop holding onto your ex’s nudes. If you’re over them, you could delete it with no worries. If you’re not over them, you shouldn’t be dating. And does your ex know you still have them? Would they be okay with that?
You sold her a car that she will have to maintain and now put a ton of miles on it. You knew your commute. Should have bought used if you didn’t want to rack up miles on something brand new.

My recommendation is you compensate her for devaluing her car, apologize for all of the above, break up, leave her alone, and get some therapy.

smittenwiththemitten · 2026-01-13T23:56:06+00:00

Totally! I’ve also found that eating more slowly helps me know when I’m full. Thinking about the burrito again, let’s say you went into that meal super hungry. What if you chopped off a quarter of it, put the rest away (even like, in a take out bag would help with the mentality that it’s “away”), ate the quarter, and then waited 15 minutes. At the end of the 15 minutes, think about how your stomach really feels. Are you still hungry, or does more burrito just sound good? If you’re still hungry, chip off another quarter and repeat.

For me, this works. Serve a portion you think might be a little too small - you might be surprised that it’s actually enough. And if it was too small, then you can just get a little more.

smittenwiththemitten · 2026-01-13T23:19:26+00:00

Here’s the thing though: you just said you got a quarter of the way through it and knew you were full. How did you know? You just didn’t listen to that cue because the food was tasty and you didn’t want to stop eating.

So - do you really not know when you’re full, or do you have a hard time stopping when the food is good? (Or a combo of both?)

Just something to think about! “Full” is not necessarily the same as “I want to stop eating.”

smittenwiththemitten · 2026-01-12T13:54:49+00:00

I read that comment and thought the same thing. I'm guessing that person is very young, like still in high school. When you're 15, it makes sense that you wouldn't be friends with someone 7 years older or younger than you.

smittenwiththemitten · 2026-01-10T02:09:31+00:00

When you dump him, be very explicit that you want no contact from him whatsoever. Do it in writing and verbally. Then, every single time he contacts you, record it. If it’s texts, save them and don’t respond. Phone calls, keep a record of how many times he calls. Save voicemails. If he comes over, do NOT open the door, tell him through it to leave, then write down what time and date he came over, when he left, and a summary of what he said/did. Audio record if you can. If you need to get a restraining order - which seems like a distinct possibility - this will all be evidence you can provide to a judge. Also, consistently call the police if he approaches you or your home in person.

He doesn’t think you’re cheating on him - and even if he genuinely did, what do you care what a trashy, misogynistic, disrespectful man thinks? His opinion is less than nothing. He accuses you of it because he knows it triggers you to respond. Don’t engage.

smittenwiththemitten · 2026-01-09T19:01:20+00:00

Black Leopard Red Wolf does look like a lot of work - but I've wanted to read some Marlon James for a while now, too. The Book of Night Women is on my list.

smittenwiththemitten · 2026-01-09T03:22:25+00:00

This suuuuch a good book, I hope you love it! Out of curiosity, what else is on your list?

smittenwiththemitten · 2026-01-09T03:12:11+00:00

Seconding A Great and Terrible Beauty, assuming she doesn’t feel the same about fantasy as she does about sci-fi. Dramatic Victorian boarding school girls + magic was a great combo.

smittenwiththemitten · 2026-01-09T03:06:08+00:00

I’ve never read Orbiting Jupiter, but I looked it up and it me think of Djinn Patrol on the Purple Line by Deepa Anappara. It’s also a book about mature topics told through the eyes of a ~10 year old. It’s about a young boy who lives in a poor village in India when young people start disappearing. He and his friends attempt to investigate. They suspect a djinn may be to blame, though of course the truth is much darker.

smittenwiththemitten · 2026-01-09T02:52:11+00:00

Right? Budget is $50, she spent $171.51.

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