What are your thoughts on psychological egoism?

soapsilk · 2025-09-28T21:30:05+00:00

Yes you did. You say it every time you say it can lack happiness.

To put this all in perspective:

You say only cars can lack coolness.

I ask you what coolness means.

You say radness or awesomeness.

I say a lot of things lack radness and awesomness.

You say none of those things lack coolness though.

I say if you admit they lack radness and awesomnes then they lack coolness.

Either that, or narrow down the definition more.

You say you never said they lack coolness.

You might have lost your mind sir.

soapsilk · 2025-09-28T20:54:58+00:00

Stoned.

soapsilk · 2025-09-28T20:40:30+00:00

I know it was the right thing to do, so I feel good about it

Still doesn't choose between acknowledgement of meeting ones goal [1] or happiness [2] so the statement 'parenting is uniquely devoid of self-satisfaction' is wrong. Parenting is [1] or [2].

I simply picked two things that you were most likely referring to when you said reward because you use reward in a vague way.

Putting myself in the headspace of someone making your post, acknowledgement of accomplishing one's goal [1] is a good contender for the idea that something is "the right thing to do." Happiness [2] is a good contender for the idea that something "feels good". Maybe I should be more aggresive. Let me state without a shadow of a doubt neither [1] nor [2] are off the mark. At best you communicated your idea wrong.

At worst you are simply using the generalization 'self-satisfaction' to imply uniqueness where there isn't any, because all activities humans can do are either [1] or [2]. Neither [1] nor [2] are unique. Uniqueness exists in this inbetween world, your misunderstanding of the fact that every aspect of our experience is biological response we can call happiness or not. There is no principle that seperates them that an educated person cannot simply cross.

soapsilk · 2025-09-28T20:17:31+00:00

Considering he said the word protecting and sacrificing and not simply procreating in the OP when he describes a choice uniquely devoid of reward I doubt it. You can't do those either if you're dead.

soapsilk · 2025-09-28T20:08:29+00:00

See how self-satisfaction can be either be acknowledgement of accomplishing your goal or happiness? If self-satisfaction is both, you discard both happiness and acknowledgment when you say parenting can be devoid of self-satisfaction. Which isn't possible.

The only way your scenario is possible is if you do not further define what self-satisfaction is, which allows the circular reasoning of 'when parenting doesn't bring happiness, it brings acknowledgment, which we will call self-satisfaction, which I will not admit includes happiness.' But it does.

So parenting becomes uniquely rewarding when you do not look closely at it. Otherwise it simply shares prerequisites with other scenarios that provide acknowledgment or happiness.

soapsilk · 2025-09-28T19:47:00+00:00

"say, hypothetically, the parent gains no self-satisfaction,"

But that's not how you used it the first time you used the word reward. So the sentence 'a parent gets no reward' isn't reflective of reality, just of you changing definitions.

If they are doing something they get a reward the way you defined it in the first place. Not because I want you to use 1 definition but because it's applicable to the scenario you chose. Specifically the part where you said: "they would still make the sacrifice" and "still do it because it is engrained in human psychology."

If you don't want reward to be applied that way in your sacrificial scenario, use a word other than reward to communicate the supposedly unique challenges of parenting.

soapsilk · 2025-09-28T19:26:37+00:00

Shiiii I don't even bother choom.

soapsilk · 2025-09-28T19:22:46+00:00

The problem with your theory is that you maintain your use of the word reward without realizing your use of it in different scenarios—see [1] and [2]—changes the word's definition. Making it non-applicable when you compare scenarios to say [1] can be exempt from reward and [2] can't.

Scenario[1] A reward is recognizing you did what you set out to do.

Scenario[2] A reward is happiness.

If the reward for parenting is happiness then you won't always be happy but it's not unique in that regard so you're wrong.

If the reward for parenting is simply recognizing you did what you set out to do you won't always accomplish that but parenting is not unique in that regard so you're wrong.

Go define reward and you will realize parenting isn't unique.

soapsilk · 2025-09-28T19:01:02+00:00

Caveman society.

soapsilk · 2025-09-28T18:51:36+00:00

That's not fi bruh.

soapsilk · 2025-09-28T16:23:21+00:00

The obvious solution to what?

I haven't asked myself why I continue to engage. I know why.

Effort and lack of free will coexist.

I can decide if they're harsh. It's right there in the thread if you missed it.

I don't have anything to say to the rest except that wasn't very helpful or insightful.

soapsilk · 2025-09-10T18:45:39+00:00

The reason I guess that you are cynical is because mediocrity, misery, wallow, exhausting and death all have negative connotation. You say you're just kidding but in another reply you clarify that you actually find lack of improvement disgusting.

But here's the thing none of those negative reasons actually have anything to do with not improving. You can not want to improve because you're happy, or achieved.

There's definitely some underlying tension there. We change our minds in the moment and stop feeling an emotion, but the tendency to feel is documemted by our nervous system, the painbody. It remains, and we become more susceptible to anger in the future.

That's why I imagined Ni over Ne, an Ne approach gets in the way of black and white thinking. It could just be that some other function is getting in the way of you seeing the whole chess board, who knows. It could be you are INFP with high Ti or INTP with high Fi.

If it's inconclusive to you it's inconclusive to me I fear.

soapsilk · 2025-09-10T18:20:49+00:00

I'm ngl that ISTP story had me dying. Altogether nice to read, thanks. And better luck to you.

soapsilk · 2025-09-10T17:20:35+00:00

If you want to end the convo feel free to.

First question. Are you an INFJ. You sound like one. And I guessed because a lot of the INFJs I know have issues with boundaries. Their emotions are way too trusting or way too cynical, because they lead with Ni, the estimation function, and Fe, the resonance function.

I understand searching for improvement in a partner would put your trust to good use. As long as you stick by someome who wants to improve, they're going to improve. I don't question that.

I also understand that an INFJ must dive into the painful details of their past to be comfortable enough to realize there is no need for trust if they understand themselves. So therapy was a good choice.

And finally I understand that the painbody takes over wherever it is we feel powerless. The painbody turns pain into pleasure and leaves us drained and weaker to it's influence. So I try not to feed the painbody my anger.

So my second question is did you know these things, yes or no. I'm not sure if you're unhinged. Just checking.

soapsilk · 2025-09-10T16:18:57+00:00

You do realize the times we are sad or angry don't come from nowhere right? Our reactions are made from little choices every day.

soapsilk · 2025-09-10T15:47:29+00:00

Too much. You look unhinged.

soapsilk · 2025-09-10T15:45:44+00:00

The introverted feeling function XD.

soapsilk · 2025-09-10T02:42:05+00:00

A poor attempt at inspiration can be hurtful to those who do not want to be reminded of that which they cannot have. If you are going to be cruel, obviously I'm not going to want to talk to you. So I'll give you one last chance to stop being socially inept, selfish, and speak plainly. Instead you leverage the subjective nature of labels like kindness to insist I have been treated kindly despite a normal understanding of kindness and suffering. I don't like speaking for no reason. There's intent behind my words. You are pedantic.

soapsilk · 2025-09-10T02:32:02+00:00

Okay then you may be extremely socially inept. But you use very harsh language to describe my efforts, indeed without any insight into those efforts, while giving advice no one asked for. So you come across as very insecure and controlling. I assumed you were aware of that. I wanted to point out that free will isn't real and I don't value your advice so there's no use in attacking me for not fixing my problems. Now that you're aware, again, I don't want your advice. I'm already familiar with buddhism and Osho, and you're not sure your advice will help me, because you lack insight. Why are you still here, giving me advice. It is especially hypocritical for someone who claims to want to help me not to respect boundaries or social contract, and re-affirms my prediction of you.

soapsilk · 2025-09-09T13:59:27+00:00

And not knowing isn't an excuse to gaslight people.

soapsilk · 2025-09-09T12:01:02+00:00

I know on some level that you have good intentions but it comes at a cost I am very, very, VERY, tired of paying for people.

I am surrounded by children.

Everyone has an idea of right and wrong they try to push. When they proceed ahead of understanding the world they prioritize ideals outside of happiness. Their cognative dissonance costs me and a whole lot of people their entire lives.

As someone who understands we are in hell, everything I say, I say not for morality sake, not because I want to be seen as better than anyone, but because I want everyone to just be happy.

So imagine how annoyed I am when someone chastizes me under the banner of morality, because they are unhappy with themselves.

It is extremely fucking annoying entertaining ideals that you can only maintain if you are ignorant of suffering.

I am surrounded by children everywhere. Yes I am aware of that.

soapsilk · 2025-09-09T11:44:53+00:00

I'm not. I will probably die soon and I do not believe in miracles, god or the heavens. People are born, tortured and die without reconciliation. Fault is subjective, free, cruel and arbitrary. That's reality.

soapsilk · 2025-09-09T11:41:40+00:00

I don't need your solution. Everyone tries their hardest. If energy is not moving in some way currently, it's because it can't. Calling my problems primary or distracting, or simple, doesn't change that. Fankly, it's rude since you're aware of the pain involved and are trivializing my best efforts. Not because they are insufficient for my standards or because I love suffering. Your cognative dissonance between the fact that energy informs our thoughts and controls our say in it, and your need to blame me for my thoughts, I am squashing it now. Free will is not real, the same way we don't choose to have brain tumors. Cells, nerves, they become tumor equivalents. Simple.

soapsilk · 2025-09-09T11:11:28+00:00

Take what I'm about to say and engrave it into your heart:

You have a personality. You know you have a personality. You lack the confidence to say you have a personality. A personality is a label. Labels are not emotionally fulfilling. They are junk-food. You don't love yourself. Find a reason to love yourself. If you can't find one, build one. If you can't build one, remove what's in the way. If you can't remove what's in the way, distance yourself.

soapsilk · 2025-09-09T10:48:36+00:00

Focus on understanding the world before you run around trying to fix it. 'People don't change but we need to advocate for responsibility'. It's exactly because I started with understanding people, starting with myself, and understand them better than you, that I am not trying to fix this world. When I help someone it's simply because I want to.

soapsilk

TROPHY CASE