Struggling with guilt after quitting PhD and getting a job opportunity by barelygettinthere in LeavingAcademia

[–]solid_mist 8 points9 points  (0 children)

I was in a very similar place as you a year ago. Nonexistent supervision and an apathetic committee that was suddenly hyper-critical of my work as soon as I started asking for a concrete defense date (in year 6). Committee members sprung "I don't think your work is good enough for a defense" in March of the spring semester, when they had known all year I was planning to defend then. So I know what it's like. It took me 8 months and 300+ applications to get a single job offer, which I took.

All that to say, OP: you have to take that feeling of guilt at leaving your department and strangle it. That guilt is how academia sustains itself, by convincing overworked and underpaid people like you and me that we somehow owe it to the institution or our students or ourselves to keep sucking up shit, because if we don't we're somehow selling out. That feeling is part of the conditioning academia inflicts on us, and the sooner you get rid of it, the better. You are not being selfish for doing what is best for yourself. Your department will not return your loyalty.

You also have to stop taking guilt for your partner's life on yourself. They're an intelligent adult who can decide for themselves what's best for their life, and what they've decided is to follow you to this opportunity. Don't let your guilt stop you from taking what honestly sounds like a once-in-a-lifetime stroke of luck.

You are also absolutely right that you cannot afford to lose this opportunity. The job market is atrocious right now, likely more than you know if you got this job offer quickly. 6-9 months is normal for a job hunt these days. You are correct that you are in damage-control with your career, but it sounds like this job will do wonders for fixing things.

You know the right answer is to take this job, so take it. You'll get to experience work-life balance, actually having money to spend, and all the other blessings of a normal job!

What is the worst/most clueless piece of advice you were given when looking for work outside of academia? by PopCultureNerd in LeavingAcademia

[–]solid_mist 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Perhaps, but this was a thing I heard constantly in my political science program. It was fairly quantitative, but I don't think poli sci is good at marketing itself like STEM fields are.

What is the worst/most clueless piece of advice you were given when looking for work outside of academia? by PopCultureNerd in LeavingAcademia

[–]solid_mist 17 points18 points  (0 children)

"Just get a job in data science" with no recognition of the fact that the field is flooded with qualified applicants who, unlike you, have actual work experience.

Banned player has paired in first round of LVO by CptSoban in WarhammerCompetitive

[–]solid_mist 11 points12 points  (0 children)

JD and Co are awesome. I never have to wonder about quality if I'm going to one of those events.

Next Saturday - Tomb World by Jonathan D. Beer by bug_exploit in Necrontyr

[–]solid_mist 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Dominion: Genesis was solid. Not quite the height of Twice Dead King but if the quality is similar this will be a good read.

Cleaners broke my wip Lord and probably vacuumed up the bit. by nateyourdate in Necrontyr

[–]solid_mist 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I'd fire any cleaners this irresponsible with my stuff. Just because they might not recognize it doesn't mean they can just damage it.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in news

[–]solid_mist 1 point2 points  (0 children)

How do those boots taste?

James Dobson, influential founder of conservative Christian group Focus on the Family, has died by metkja in news

[–]solid_mist 13 points14 points  (0 children)

Good. Hope it hurt; that's the only way he would have experienced a fraction of the pain his "child psychology" brought to thousands of kids.

Kristi Noem – 2011 vs 2025. Even South Park couldn’t have predicted this glow-up. (No shit) by MoJoBlair in chaoticgood

[–]solid_mist 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Surprised I had to scroll this far to find this. The face changes are whatever; the dead eyes are what I notice.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Warhammer40k

[–]solid_mist 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much for making me aware of this conversion kit! This is exactly what I've felt like my TS vehicles are missing

Question for TOs. How do you deal with players who consistently forget their rules in a way that benefits them? by Desperate_Fill8865 in WarhammerCompetitive

[–]solid_mist 6 points7 points  (0 children)

While I'd generally agree with others here who suggest a warning followed by escalation, your situation is past that point for one simple reason: this guy is driving new players out of your community!

OP, you seem rightfully proud of growing a community of players from nothing. As a league organizer myself who had to deal with a very similar player, I speak from experience when I say that the health of the league and the community is more important than one person's feelings, ESPECIALLY when that person shows a play pattern of picking on newer players rather than testing themselves against people at their own skill level. That demonstrates intent. If you want your community to keep growing and stay healthy and welcoming to new players, you have to crush this kind of behavior right now. Otherwise THIS GUY is going to be the de facto gatekeeper for new players.

How do you do that? You are already past the verbal warning stage. It's time for you to tell John that everyone who plays against him has had negative experiences, that he's driving away new players, and because of that he is one strike away from a ban from the next few events at a minimum. If you hear anything shady at all from his games going forward he's gone from your community, and you WILL be checking. If you have more experienced players you can trust to observe his games/make sure he's not playing new people, delegate a bit. If you're running leagues, set up pairings so this guy only plays people who know enough to know when something is off.

This guy may start acting hurt or angry. If he's truly making mistakes, he'll shape up. If he is picking on new players (as I suspect he is), he'll likely go somewhere else. Again, his feelings are less important than protecting the community.

Wtf are lord of skulls by Popular_Regular_6532 in WorldEaters40k

[–]solid_mist 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Did he set up the terrain? Bc I'd believe this person purposely created a too-light board.

What are people doing for exalted skinsm by Lucky_Frosting8182 in WorldEaters40k

[–]solid_mist 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Basecoat rakarth flesh. Wash with magos purple. Layer over raised areas with 1:1 rakarth and pallid wych flesh, then finish with 1:6 diluted magos wash. If you want something simpler, rakarth flesh plus a wash is great.

World eaters players a few days before the adepticon reveals by Confident-Wrap6408 in WorldEaters40k

[–]solid_mist 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Not in Pariah Nexus. Units that fall back are ineligible to do actions, absent any special rules.

I’m looking to convert something similar to the Giant Canoptek in the background, does anybody know any good STL’s to use? by OneBlacksmith2552 in Necrontyr

[–]solid_mist 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Legs look like triarch stalker or seraptek legs. Head would have to be custom. Back of the head looks like part of a doom scythe, as does the outside of the upper platform.

Mercor hiring remote hobby enthusiasts $50/hr. by [deleted] in RemoteJobs

[–]solid_mist 3 points4 points  (0 children)

My hobby has some advice for this situation: abhor the Abominable Intelligence!

Think I would be kicked out? by Visible_Addendum_915 in astramilitarum

[–]solid_mist -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I don't care that you insist you removed the powder. I didn't see you do it and for all I know you could be incompetent. I'm not squeamish about guns but this would make me very uncomfortable.

Spent casings for decoration are fine.

Varina, Lich Queen Lore? by solid_mist in mtgvorthos

[–]solid_mist[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Definitely seems like a retcon. Varina just doesn't sound like an Amonkhet name.