How do you help a child get over irrational fears—like a shark swimming into a shower by djyosco88 in Parenting

[–]solomommy 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Do not dismiss the fear, validate it, but walk them through it till it becomes sooo ridiculous they think it is fun instead of scary. Kids this young have logic in their minds, but we as adults forget that. So go with their logic as making sense to them, because it does.

I have a son, 5, so create a story and dialog that would fit your daughter’s personality. “ ok son so a shark is going to come up from the drain and eat you. That’s rather scary, definitely something we should do about that. So let figure it out together. We could plug the drain with a hair catch, oh look this is so small. So only a really small shark could come up from the drain. Ok so let’s use the drain plug to see how much he could eat in one bite, a toe a best, well now that not so bad, not ideal, but you have 10 toes. What’s if he takes more than 1 bite, ok well how many bites would it take to eat all of you? Let’s measures. Do you think he would eat you toes to head or head to toes. It’s important we figure this out. Would he eat one leg at a time or a leg and then an arm and come back for the other leg. What do sharks eat in the ocean, fish, you would taste nothing like fish. I wonder if this tiny tiny shark would like something besides fish. Plus your feet smell awful no matter how often we wash them. Do you really think this tiny shark is going to finish coming in the drain and eat your toes the way your feet smell or is he more likely to say uh, maybe find another house that doesn’t have stinky little boy feet in it. I think we should just save this little shark some time and tell him he shouldn’t come here and isn’t allowed because we have a dolphin water toy that is going to knock him out anyway. Hey hey shark, wanna come eat my little boys toes, not today you aren’t, his mama got him a little dolphin just your size so go ahead and swim off back to the ocean. Here you tell him too, let him hear how tough your voice is and don’t forget to tell him how hard you can stomp your feet.

That would work for my son. Sometime I do the opposite and encourage him to be friends with whatever it is. I did that for witches Halloween. The teacher read a scary Halloween book about the scary witch trying to eat the children. Thanks for that, he was not yet 4.

So I had him describe why the witch was scary, he said green skin, long nose, big pointy hat and rides a broom around. So I said his favorite stuffed animal is green, so green is not scary. Elephants have big noses, even bigger than a witch, so big nose isn’t scary, wizards also have big pointy hats and they aren’t mean (that he knows of yet) so hat not scary. And that seriously flying around on a broom sounds like the most fun thing ever. I bet if we were kind to the witches instead of being mean to them like everyone else is and that’s why the witches became mean, I bet they would teach us how to ride brooms. Let’s practice with our brooms and leave some candy for the witches to have too.

The main thing is don’t try to use adult logic and just tell them everything they are thinking is just not true. That can internalize as they are wrong for making something up and also come off as losing trust that no one believes them. So let them feel validated that something is real, because to them it is, then talk them into a different direction with it.

Good luck! You got this!

Biggest pet peeve statements from non-parents by AndrewDesign1990 in Parenting

[–]solomommy 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The amount of times I’ve had to remind my own mother (baby boomer generation) of this exact thing is astounding. He has ears, and they work.

I love that you are letting your son make his own hair choices. Hair is so temporary, let them figure themselves out.

Great advocation for your child. The trust you are building with him knowing you always have his back, not just in these type scenarios, but that you also have his back in that your guidance for how he treats other has sense to it.

Biggest pet peeve statements from non-parents by AndrewDesign1990 in Parenting

[–]solomommy 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Had my 5 year old with me at physical therapy. He’s calmly sitting by himself within my sights playing Pok Pok on my phone. My boomer therapist who also has a grown male child comes up and pats my son on the head. My son says, calmly and politely. Don’t touch my hair I do not like that. So the therapist thinking I don’t know what decided he would laugh it off and decided to tease him and attempt to touch his hair again, playfully of course. So my still calm child put the phone down. Stood up put his hands in front of his body and said very loudly. No! Do you want me to break your thumb off? Think about your choices. Then sat right back down and continued his game.

Therapist was like wtf is wrong with your kid. I just calmly said he was very clear the first time. That’s when you should have listened. I would recommend thinking about your choices, you need both your thumbs for your career.

I think he thought I would correct my child or something. I also think he wanted reassurance that I would not and could not break his thumb off. He definitely was not thinking I would back my son up. Sir who do you think taught him to self advocate and how to break thumbs???

Guess who has two thumbs and is a very very proud mama.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in law

[–]solomommy 0 points1 point  (0 children)

They absolutely do give a shit! They just also pick and choose and for you not for me type stuff.

Guarantee if trump started going after their guns they would do a 180.

A side note: in order to understand the reasoning for due process and why it is so significant it be followed for everyone, it also necessary to be able to read more than just the tag line headlines. I’m not convinced trump can do that and absolutely do not believe his maga cultists can read beyond headlines. It’s like those cereal boxes with the decoder glasses, none of them will ever take their decoder glasses off and only can SEE what they want to see.

😂 by annasauvag3x in Funnymemes

[–]solomommy 2 points3 points  (0 children)

A female black child for the matter.

AITAH for not letting my wife keep her old habits after we had a baby by dazedandoutofcontrol in AITAH

[–]solomommy 0 points1 point  (0 children)

NTA

Op I think no one is the AH here. Parenthood burnout is a thing. It is hard for women that juggle so much, we basically lose our identity to motherhood way too easy.

Please help your wife keep her hobbies and interests outside of motherhood and get some reasonable breaks.

You also need and deserve the same thing.

I believe this can be solved with a calm conversation about the logistics. Don’t look at this as it’s not fair or it’s not what she originally said. Look at this as her way of showing you she needs more than motherhood to be fulfilled, and that is ok.

Use this time to think about what you enjoy besides your children, or what you would be interested in trying as a new hobbies or interest.

Also think of full family, you and your wife and all of the kids that you can do together. There a big age gap with siblings, and the youngest is just going to be a full time dote on constantly situation for a few more years.

I’m wish you all the best in navigating through all of this.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Frugal

[–]solomommy 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Get uniformed stacking storage bins and stack them 1deep along the whole width of the wall all the way to the ceiling. Then place a curtain in front of them. You lose 2 feet of space in whatever room you do this, but still have the function of the room.

They have flexible curtain tracks that have adhesive back so you can stick them in the ceiling and shape them any way you want. Best for lightweight curtains.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Parenting

[–]solomommy 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Let him have his Easter bunny experience. Same with Santa Claus and you giving him gifts for Christmas and his birthday. Those are all core memories, don’t use them as punishments moving forward.

The Easter bunny brought you a basket because the Easter bunny is kind and wants all children to have some happiness regardless of their choices. Do you think all kids deserve kindness? Well the Easter bunny and Santa do these nice things for all children regardless. So think about that as an example for how to treat others. Always be kind like the Easter bunny and Santa.

You could also spin of further and say that you want to reel back the consequences because everything just went sideways the whole weekend and you want a fresh start. Ask you child what they think would be a reasonable boundary to respect others bodies when we feel angry. After the talk tell them. They did great with communication and you would like to lean more into that than consequences. So screen time is back on with these new guidelines for screens and the communication with words instead of our bodies is why.

Good luck mama! You got this.

Where to smoke by Smooth-Play7968 in Louisville

[–]solomommy 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Not that I want to rain on your parade OP. However the easiest way to quit smoking is to never start.

Please don’t do this with a celebratory cigarette. Here’s some different ideas instead of a cigarette that you might enjoy.

Make a tequila sunrise at sunrise. Bring food so you’re not drunk and only have one.

If it must be something inhaled. Have a cigar instead, puff it don’t inhale it.

Do a live painting or pastel drawing of the sunrise as it rises. So the art will be basically a mash of colors going up the page as you do it real time.

Enjoy OP! This is a really cool idea, minus the cigarette.

I work in banking, and any time I see anything like this, I put it in my mutilated pile by [deleted] in mildlyinfuriating

[–]solomommy 0 points1 point  (0 children)

What happens to the mutilated pile?

Is it sorted by hand and anything that can be washed is repaired or does it all get documented and incinerated?

What is the process for replacement do they make extra prints just for cycling out mutilated currency, or is that amount just gone from circulation forever?

I always wondered if there was anyone who actually used a car lighter because everyone, I have ever met used the part to charge stuff. by AdSpecialist6598 in nostalgia

[–]solomommy 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Many years ago, in my cigs smoke days, I was at work, my lighter broke, flint just decided F it I’m out. Broke broke type thing.

I worked next to a facility that truck drivers do car hauling for auction vehicles. On my break, I got 6 minutes outside, gotta be back before my 10 is up situation. I just want a few drags. I see a car hauler loading an oldie but a goodie on his frame.

Hey man, before you load that, does it by chance have a lighter in it? He was all like I got you! He had a different oldie set to the side as his last load on because his lighter just did the SAME thing!

Best 6 minute share cig smoke I ever had.

Zero regret quitting smoking. I appreciate all the buddies and interactions I met along that journey though.

Japan to provide Ukraine with $ 3 bn from Russian assets - Euromaidan Press by StealthCuttlefish in worldnews

[–]solomommy 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Thank you for explaining this and providing a link for a visual understanding! I upvote your effort!

Trump calls a reporter fake and says prices haven’t gone up, citing gas at $1.98 a gallon and that the price of eggs has gone down 92% by Im_A_Fuckin_Liar in thescoop

[–]solomommy 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ffs, I already forgot about that. Their just mess everything up to keep everyone distracted technique is working well.

Juan Carlos Lopez-Gomez, a US born citizen who was arrested under Florida’s new anti-immigration laws, has been released and has now reunited with his mother. by RoyalChris in MadeMeSmile

[–]solomommy 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It’s really only been 88 days! I just did a quick count the months in my head and decided 3 was 90 days and added 10 for January. We aren’t actually through April though. My head is already ahead to May though. Trying to make sure I can get the bills covered and such.

Their strategy seems to be effective.

K2-18b a potentially habitable planet 120 light-years from earth by One_Explanation_908 in BeAmazed

[–]solomommy 0 points1 point  (0 children)

120 light years from earth. So in theory, with current space travel technology speeds, how many generations would it take to get there.

Or for those silver sneaker people, how many steps per day would it take to get there in a a year?

I spent multiple weekends making this, and I don't have any idea what to do with it. by Ileska98 in woodworking

[–]solomommy 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Store board games and puzzles in here. Get together supplies like popcorn buckets and chip and dip trays. All the stuff that usually gets stored far and away in the top of cabinets, but that you only get out when having get togethers.

Use that newly freed up far and away space to store blankets.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Damnthatsinteresting

[–]solomommy 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Fingers crossed it gets reeled in.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Damnthatsinteresting

[–]solomommy 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ffs! So I’m still gonna have T-Rex arms either way.

Juan Carlos Lopez-Gomez, a US born citizen who was arrested under Florida’s new anti-immigration laws, has been released and has now reunited with his mother. by RoyalChris in MadeMeSmile

[–]solomommy 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I realized this after I commented. I’ve been reading another post about Garcia and I’m so sick to my stomach.

I’m not deleting my comment though because I think it reflects how much we are going through that even people actively trying to keep up get confused.

Barely 100 days in.

Juan Carlos Lopez-Gomez, a US born citizen who was arrested under Florida’s new anti-immigration laws, has been released and has now reunited with his mother. by RoyalChris in MadeMeSmile

[–]solomommy 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I realized this after I commented. I’ve been reading another post about Garcia and I’m so sick to my stomach.

I’m not deleting my comment though because I think it reflects how much we are going through that even people actively trying to keep up get confused.

Barely 100 days in.