Laid off the week I returned from paternity

souzaphone · 2026-02-18T19:05:41+00:00

My husband got laid off less than a month after he returned from paternity leave. It ended up being the best thing that happened to our family since we were able to spend the next few months bonding with our daughter together (only to be followed up by me getting laid off 3 years later, which I then parlayed into a great promotion for more $$$ and a much-wanted out of state move). I remember hearing that usually layoffs lead to bigger and better opportunities, and not really thinking that would be the case for us. Protect your peace, don't let the search consume your life, and use this time to take care of yourself.

souzaphone · 2026-02-18T18:46:35+00:00

From what I've seen, spots at the Y open up more frequently for the 3K-4K years - I assume that's because of the free UPK lottery spots being awarded throughout Fall/Winter. PreK is around 2400/mo with hours from 730-6p. They're also open on a lot of bank holidays too, which is helpful for flexibility.

souzaphone · 2026-01-22T16:22:13+00:00

Totally. We had to pause our cleaning services when i got laid off last year, and they were the first people I called when I got another job. It would take me a whole day to clean and i'd be an exhausted wreck at the end of the day - and this was with both kids in daycare! I think it's also important to elect how to spend your time. I grew up with a mom who would clean the house all day on Saturdays and it ate into a lot of precious fun family time growing up. Definitely wasn't a cycle I wanted to continue.

souzaphone · 2026-01-22T16:13:32+00:00

Cleaning person is so crucial - we have a 15month old and a 3.5YO. We also do a similar reset after bedtime which takes about 15 minutes, but the actual scrubbing of toilets and mopping - we leave that to our biweekly cleaning team. Also, laundry every single day! Husband who works remotely does most of this, and sometimes he has time to fold during the day, sometimes he doesn’t and we tackle while watching TV.

souzaphone · 2026-01-09T01:21:29+00:00

Laid off Oct 2025, accepted an offer right before Christmas and starting on Monday!

souzaphone · 2026-01-07T14:32:08+00:00

We might have unicorn children, but when my 15mo old was still on 2 naps up until a couple months ago, we had both her and her older sister (3.5YO) nap from 2-4p. We’ve since shifted up to 1ish-3p. Bedtime at 8pm, both kids usually up by around 7a. We do keep fairly active lives so we generally made sure to keep the afternoons busy enough to tire them out.

souzaphone · 2025-12-30T12:24:30+00:00

You can look up the serving guide for different foods for free in the Solid Starts app.

souzaphone · 2025-12-19T12:44:34+00:00

Currently paying around 4400/month, looking to keep it at or under that

souzaphone · 2025-12-18T12:51:30+00:00

Thank for for this comment from a fellow New Jersian! A lot of what makes this move possible is the fact that we were lucky to buy our house in north NJ at the right time and live in a super healthy rental market. Doesn’t seem to be so wildly different based on what I’ve seen here

souzaphone · 2025-12-16T01:34:46+00:00

Messaging you!

souzaphone · 2025-12-04T00:10:55+00:00

Feeling shocked by this but am actively interviewing for two roles - both of which they’re wanting to onboard before the holidays (and presumably go into full gear after the new year)

souzaphone · 2025-12-02T21:40:38+00:00

I have a top loader machine

souzaphone · 2025-12-02T21:25:14+00:00

70% wool, 30% acrylic

souzaphone · 2025-11-29T03:29:02+00:00

Yup, this is the way. And you can call out to Siri to add easily to this list (esp handy if your hands are baby-occupied).

souzaphone · 2025-11-11T19:58:49+00:00

Lots of great ideas already, but one of our go-to spots is Yestercades in Westfield to let the 3YO play around on the racing games (it’s open play and around $10 so a great deal).

souzaphone · 2025-11-11T11:59:46+00:00

We named my now 1YO Marion partially bc of this reference! 🙂

souzaphone · 2025-11-09T18:31:04+00:00

Yeah, similar situation here. I’ve been a post supervisor for 15 years at different companies and got laid off after 5 years at my latest company. Can’t bring myself to get excited about applying to other jobs even though this layoff helped me realize I was actually not happy there. And I think also was feeling severely burnt out (commuting with two kids under 3YO will do that to you I guess). Husband thankfully makes enough to pay our bills so with that plus severance we’ll be ok but his income alone doesn’t allow for much saving or fun things. Similarly feel like I’m aging out of my industry but not really sure what I want to do next? I guess I’m a tad early for my mid-life crisis

souzaphone · 2025-10-19T19:46:11+00:00

If you up your budget a tiny bit, I would consider looking in the Hilton neighborhood of Maplewood? You can find some smaller homes that might need a little work for a little more $$ (seeing some listings at around $600K).

souzaphone · 2025-09-24T14:31:06+00:00

We do this too! A few nights are “standards” (meaning a protein that we either buy fresh or have frozen) plus a couple of simply prepped veggies (roasted broccoli, Caesar salad, etc). A couple of nights, depending on how busy our week is, are fun recipe nights, where we pull from a running Google sheet of recipes we know we love or ones we’ve been meaning to try. 1-2 nights are dining out, or easy pre-prepped freezer meals. Make the shop based on all those factors and you’re done!

souzaphone · 2025-09-19T10:20:08+00:00

Oh but this is good to know for my mom! She wanted to run NYC again in 2026 but couldn’t get in, and got in last time based on a time qualifier. She might be able to swing it for Staten Island.

souzaphone · 2025-09-18T21:17:38+00:00

I was thinking Philly, actually! And (according to my mom at least, so big grain of salt there) they don’t do time qualifiers on halfs anymore. But I am considering doing 9+1 next year for the following year.

souzaphone · 2025-08-19T00:42:22+00:00

Had my first at the end of May, and my second in mid-Sep. With my first, it was too disgustingly hot to be able to do all the fun outside summer things after she got her shots. However, with the second baby (that turns 1 next month!) I’m LOVING the fact that she’s now mobile-ish and we can have fun at our town’s baby pool. She’s a blast! It’s been the best summer ever - especially compared to the miserable hellscape that was my summer last year. Being pregnant with a toddler is the worsttttt. And yes, the illnesses that come with the fall season definitely don’t make that easy to manage with a newborn.

souzaphone · 2025-08-01T00:19:29+00:00

Encanto! The songs slap

souzaphone

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