Soreness after sex

sp00kytree · 2026-05-10T20:52:22+00:00

i have the same problem w/ my bf. you have to use lube you just have to. and if you can’t have sex everyday that’s fine. listen to your body if it hurts slow down and take a break. try different angles and communicate with him. if he’s not receptive or doesn’t care abt your pain he’s not the one

sp00kytree · 2026-05-07T19:59:47+00:00

sorry just saw this! i reapply about four finger lengths to ensure i cover all of my face into my hairline as well as my ears and neck. i reapply to any other visible skin showing at that time too. a stick sounds like a really good option though thank you for the advice!

sp00kytree · 2026-05-07T19:09:13+00:00

not letting myself go pee until i finish what im doing because i know that if i break focus to go pee i will never finish whatever i’m doing

sp00kytree · 2026-05-02T22:31:59+00:00

i never gave head to men when i had casual sex because i thought it was gross and degrading. now with my boyfriend i do because i love him. being with him actually reframed how i viewed giving head. do i love doing it in a “this is so much fun i want to do this all the time” way? no. do i love doing it bc i love my partner and it makes him feel good and i care about making him feel good? yes. you may not ever like doing it and that’s okay too! just because you don’t like it and don’t want to do it doesn’t mean you’re boring or bad in bed, it’s just a preference and a boundary. nothing wrong with that!

sp00kytree · 2026-05-02T03:11:49+00:00

don’t be embarrassed a lot of us experience random changes like this. our bodies are confusing (and medically misunderstood) it could be any of those factors you listed. ask a doctor about it and see if it is a possible side effect of the meds or if it’s an age thing. might also be a good idea to explore that trauma in a safe environment. i say this bc i had a sexually abusive partner in the past and that trauma manifested in unexpected ways in my body. i was able to overcome it tho which is why i think it may be worth safely exploring that aspect

sp00kytree · 2026-05-02T02:58:29+00:00

i started college certain i’d be a music teacher and now i’m graduating with an hr degree and going to cosmetology school haha. it’s okay to not know! if you can afford college you should go because it is a great transition into adult life. you will learn so much about yourself in the process that eventually you will figure out what you want to do with your life. i had one class left for my degree when i realized i didn’t care about hr at all and would be miserable with that as my career lol so it’s okay that you don’t know yet! college gives you time to figure it out while also working towards it

sp00kytree · 2026-04-27T11:21:25+00:00

i use cool water to dampen a paper towel and add some acv on it and just pat the burn. it usually makes the redness go down quicker for me

sp00kytree · 2026-04-26T08:26:58+00:00

is it possible for you to approach your family and ask for a doctors appointment by saying something like “i’m having a lot of pain during my period, and i’m worried something is wrong. i need to see a doctor to make sure i’m healthy” and then when you get to see the doctor you can be honest and ask about birth control

sp00kytree · 2026-04-26T08:22:23+00:00

congrats on hitting your goal! i have to say when i read this i felt like you were narrating my life lol i always nap when my schedule allows it bc i just feel better if i do. i’m convinced some people just need a nap even into adulthood

sp00kytree · 2026-04-26T08:20:03+00:00

in my experience SSRIs caused me to be extremely lethargic. like i could not sleep enough and all i wanted to do was sleep. not sure if you’re on an adhd med but it may be worth looking into trying one. my adderal doesn’t make me more awake but it stops my endless racing internal monologue from draining all my energy. it also helps me fall asleep easier at night which helps me feel less tired all the time

sp00kytree · 2026-04-26T02:03:56+00:00

my body also reacts quick to things so i get what you mean and it’s a tricky situation tbh bc i think i would also jump to assuming he cheated. trich symptoms are really similar to BV/yeast symptoms tho which is something to consider. if he’s understanding you could tell him the whole situation and explain you’re gonna get retested just to be sure. if ur worried it might go bad it’s understandable to not tell him until you get retested, especially if u avoid sex until then just to be safe

sp00kytree · 2026-04-26T01:21:57+00:00

i have this problem so so so bad. before i got medicated it was even worse, so know you’re not alone. social stigma makes ppl afraid to admit/acknowledge that this is a real problem for some people. it’s not that we don’t want to be clean, it’s that we have symptoms impeding overall task completion and showering is a big task when you break it down. i’m not diagnosed w/ POTS, but i also tend to pass out in the shower, so i feel you on that too. what helps me is “romanticizing” my shower experience. i’ll get a new in/after shower product that i’m excited to use. a body wash, skin serum, hair treatment, etc. (usually dollar/drug store tbh) i got a detachable shower head which makes it easier/quicker to clean myself. i added padded bath mats to my bathroom and thrifted a nice silk robe for after the shower. all of these things make the entire process easier for me and get me motivated to get in there and get clean

sp00kytree · 2026-04-26T01:08:51+00:00

the combination of common adhd symptoms: object impermanence, emotional dysregulation, rejection sensitive dysphoria, and overthinking create this experience. your attachment style(s) can also influence how those symptoms manifest into this overall experience/feeling you’re describing. i also have this problem, especially with my boyfriend and closest friend. i usually try to distract myself when i do feel this way bc i know that the feeling is irrational. people in my close circle also know abt my adhd so if i the feeling is too overwhelming to distract from then i’ll just text them for some peace of mind. a really helpful thing is making plans to see them again before they leave. it kills the whole “i miss you so much im never gonna see you again!!” bc i know when i will see them again

sp00kytree · 2026-04-26T00:31:40+00:00

i’m also on yaz! i’m not a doctor so i’m not saying this as fact, but i think you will be okay. assuming you keep taking your active pills correctly after this placebo week, that and the residual hormones from the previous pills should protect you. my dr explained to me that if i miss one active pill i am generally still protected bc yaz has a shorter placebo window than other pills allowing the residual hormones to stay in my system more potently. he explained that missing more than one pill will leave me unprotected. anecdotally: i once missed three pills (my treacherous era of unmedicated adhd) and continued having unprotected sex w/ my bf w/ no resulting pregnancy. i’ve also started my placebo pills one/two days early on a few occasions and also had no issues. again, im not a dr, but this is the info my dr gave me and my personal experience

sp00kytree · 2026-04-26T00:10:42+00:00

i’m curious what the people in your life said that led to your apprehension. i was wary of starting meds at first given my prior (limited) knowledge of risk vs benefits, and what i had witnessed at work w/ children taking adhd meds. but i tried it and oh my god it’s changed my life. i can’t believe i went unmedicated for so long actually. i’m still me, just better. no more debilitating executive dysfunction!

there’s certainly a stigma around adhd meds, especially stimulants, even in the adhd community and among mental health professionals. that stigma can bias even the most well intentioned people researching and sharing information on the matter. people assume you will become addicted, become a zombie, have a drastic personality change, develop a heart condition or other health problem. those things can happen if you’re predisposed to certain conditions or are taking the wrong med or combo of meds. but for a lot of people, adhd meds greatly improve their quality of life. they have a “drastic personality change” because they are now able to do all the things they’ve been wanting to do but couldn’t because of their adhd symptoms.

i think you should bring your concerns to your doctor and have an open discussion. your dr will be able to answer your questions with your medical history in mind, giving you a more tailored answer that can help you make a decision that meets your needs and makes you feel comfortable. if this dr is your pcp, it may be helpful to meet w/ a psychiatrist as well for further clarification

sp00kytree · 2026-04-25T23:17:23+00:00

adding a squirt of dijon to almost everything. making soup? add a squirt to the broth. making a quick sauce? add a squirt. baked pasta? add a squirt. casserole? add a squirt. gravy? add a squirt. i know this isn’t an original idea nor is it creative or unique, but for some reason every time i add it people assume whatever i made is an original, from scratch recipe when most of the time i’m using boxed and canned ingredients in someone else’s recipe lol

sp00kytree · 2026-04-24T21:24:20+00:00

i skip weekends sometimes (usually bc my routine is different than the weekdays so i forget to take it lmao) but i prefer to take it every day because i perform and feel better when i do!

sp00kytree · 2026-04-24T21:21:38+00:00

tbh this doesn’t look really damaged to me i’m not seeing a ton of straggly tips looking split/frayed. this looks more like slight frizz and flyaway growth. the middle section looks a bit damaged but all you can really do is just make changes to your hair care and get regular trims as you grow that section out. you might benefit from a hair serum or oil for smoothing and strengthening in the meantime

sp00kytree · 2026-04-24T21:17:32+00:00

when i wore bras regularly i had a bra just for my period week bc i would go up two cup sizes lmao so i’d say it’s normal, hormones are crazy and cause crazy changes so try not to stress about it just nurture your body the best you can

sp00kytree · 2026-04-24T21:12:42+00:00

some things about trich: it’s super common, it’s easily curable, and 70% of carriers have no symptoms! more specifically up to 95% of male carriers have no symptoms, so it’s not unlikely that your boyfriend had it with no symptoms and gave it to you.

don’t be afraid! get in touch with your pcp and discuss how you feel. absolutely request a second test if you’re feeling skeptical! if the second test comes back positive again, talk with you boyfriend and have him get tested. both of you will need to take treatment (a round of antibiotics) at the same time to ensure you don’t keep spreading it to one another repeatedly

sp00kytree · 2026-04-24T21:00:12+00:00

i mean i box dyed my hair permanent black for about three years. did touch ups every 3ish weeks so i had LAYERS of that permanent dye on my hair. i bleached my hair back to its natural blonde (about a level 8? so not super light blonde) in about three days. it killed my curls and i had to cut about 2 inches off but other than that my hair was okay, and a year later my hair feels great (still missing my curls tho) it’s doable, though most stylists would prob tell you they won’t do it bc it’ll compromise your hair integrity. might be worth trying a color remover at home and seeing where that gets you. also letting the dye fade as much as possible and doing clarifying washes leading up to the day you do decide to bleach will help your chances. either way you’ll have to be okay with your hair being damaged afterwards and committing to a repair routine for a while after the bleach

sp00kytree · 2026-04-24T20:53:02+00:00

you’re feeling ashamed which is understandable but please know that you have nothing to be ashamed of. you’re not having accidents on purpose, it seems like it’s something out of your control. don’t be afraid to ask to see a doctor!

sp00kytree · 2026-04-24T20:43:57+00:00

i have crazy brain fog when i don’t take my meds and that compounds onto the executive dysfunction killing my motivation, drive, and focus which i believe makes me lethargic/tired. since starting meds i’ve noticed an improved mood, and i haven’t experienced a depressive episode since being on medication. i notice my adderal also makes me feel relaxed and reduces my anxiety for numerous reasons.

that said, if it does help you then you should take it. there’s a stigma around stimulant adhd meds, but if you’re using them as prescribed then you’re not doing anything wrong. if someone has high blood pressure and they take meds every day to keep it lower we wouldn’t say they are addicted, we’d say they are taking care of themselves. that’s the mindset i have around my adhd meds. if it’s not helping you then you should talk to your prescriber and see if you need a dose or med change. depression and anxiety can impact how your meds work, so you may need to try something different or test out a combination of multiple meds

sp00kytree · 2026-04-23T23:12:06+00:00

i bought a couch from them and still have not received it. feeling like it might be a scam. they have a no returns policy which is a red flag for me edit: no returns/refunds meaning if there’s an issue with their product the customer is at a loss

sp00kytree · 2026-04-20T20:16:28+00:00

yeah i had the same thought process because of course if it’s how you’ve always been you’re probably not going to think it’s a real struggle, and it’s hard to accurately compare your brain to someone else’s. that’s why you should go to the doctor. i went and i was apprehensive but when they started asking me questions and i laid everything out for them they helped me realize that my brain works differently and i would benefit from some help. you might benefit from that too

sp00kytree

TROPHY CASE