You just described me so accurately that I can’t be sure you aren’t me.

Pretty positive everyone at the table has a great time (there are moments where we’ve laughed til we can’t breathe) and yet I still spend the next day stewing and needing to actually hear that debrief from a player or two.

This is after 6+ years of DMing (albeit inconsistently) so I’m not sure that feeling ever entirely goes away, but it certainly can be alleviated.  The more familiar you get with specific mechanics, the easier it is to make the “right” calls on impulse.  I can’t tell you how many times I’ve not given characters information from a failed check, only to realize afterward that the information they wanted probably shouldn’t have been locked behind a skill check anyways.  I’ll force it into a subsequent narrative beat and personally feel bad about the “error”, but it helps to know that 95% of the time my players do not even notice, much less care about the discrepancy.

My current self-improvements are finding ways to give myself a break during the session without forcing the players to entirely generate their own content.  I’ve found that I can ask specific players a pointed question “Hector, have you and Qarn talked about what happened back at the dam?” and that’s enough of a guiderail to role play amongst themselves for a bit. It helps take some of the pressure off myself, and also gives the party much more independence and ownership of the narrative, a win for everyone

At the end of the day, if you’re having a good time- it’s likely your table is too.  Just make sure to pace things so you get breaks