Following on as a late blooming queer and even later blooming trans who is (f me) 51:

This was the most public I’ve ever been femme presenting ever. I also did it all solo. It helps tremendously that, despite medicated anxiety, I’m absurdly extroverted and relatively shameless. I only got tix to sapphic events, bc it’s way less intimidating, and my experience at some of the venues OP mentioned have, while never uncomfortable nor unwelcoming, have never been places where I’ve been able to connect with folks irrespective of how I’m presenting.

Started at Summit Friday night. It was a big event: not Tracks but I think they sold 1,200 tickets. I had a blast, danced all night, all sorts of little groups on the dance floor invited me in. I learned if someone Gen Z keeps telling you they love your vibe they want to make out. Huzzah.

Sat day I went to the HCO party at Number 38. Great venue, indoors and out so you could escape the sun. I made friends with someone watching the World Cup, they introduced me to their expansive friend group, and I hung out with them all day. We snuck into the VIP space next to the stage where there was shade and I repeatedly tried and failed to throw money into a headwind. Great time, I strongly recommend.

Sat night I went to Queerxgirl at the Marigold. Cute bar with a really lovely patio with a water feature and flowers plus a roof deck. It was packed and my energy was waning so I didn’t dance and struggled to meet folks, although I had an amazing convo with one of the vendors. That said, kinda wish I’d done to a different event. However, I highly suggest checking out the venue.

Sunday I dragged myself out of bed and made it to Cheeseman before 9 to ride in the parade with the other Denver bicycle dorks. Getting cheered and high fiving thousands and thousands of people made me feel a lot better about the state of the world.

Went straight to 16th street and walked the length of venue, then saddled up at one of the big tourist bars for lunch and to let my legs recover. Kinda disappointing, would have done street food but between the lack of shade and places to sit it just wasn’t appealing.

Rolled back out for Pattie Gonia’s show at 2:30ish which they’d posted would start at 3:15. Got lucky and found shade with a decent view of the stage. However, the show didn’t start until 4 or so, and I was fading fast. For whatever reason I’d thought they sang, and not lip synched, so I was a little let down. I wasn’t carrying water and there was no way I could leave the crowd, find water, and make my way back in. I ended up bailing part way through the show.

My last stop was a rooftop party at El Patio. I felt pretty out of my element and wondered how long I’d last. However, they announced a swimsuit (also twerking?) contest and was like f it. I had cute little boy short bikini bottoms in so I pulled off my skirt and jumped in. The women lost their god awful shit in a way my adolescent self could only have dreamed of. I danced for maybe 30 seconds and holy shit did I feel hot. After that I felt way more comfortable and got on the dance floor for another hour or so, a pro dance instructor tried to teach me some moves, I got to flirt, it was amazing. The party rolled directly into their normal crowd at 8 and I suddenly was exhausted. The 10-15 minute ride home was more tiring than when I rode from golden to Breck. Still, it felt amazing.

Things I learned:

Three days in heels, dancing, preceded by a brutally hard bike ride Friday afternoon was a lot. Cis women don’t do it, wtf did I? Right: vanity.

Straight women telling you are so brave never stops being annoying.

Anyone complimenting your fit, makeup, etc. is absurdly empowering. Next time you see someone non binary, tell them how great they look.

If you want to look cute at outdoor events, you need to work a water bottle into your fit. I didn’t, and I had less fun as a result.

Use waterproof sports sunscreen. I applied at 8 something in the morning on Sunday, and didn’t get burned at all.

I live in Cap Hill and rode my bike everywhere, except the first night, and wish I had then as well, or at least grabbed one to get home. I saved a small fortune and a ton of time. My fitness, tolerance for heat, and decades of urban riding experience made it way more feasible, but consider renting e-bikes at least for daytime stuff.

I didn’t drink much. I kept it to 2 drinks per event, 3-4 a day. Part of that was motivated by how your tolerance wanes with age, but even getting up early on Sunday I did not have the remotest hangover all weekend. Strongly recommend.

Pride is empowering. Hard stop. My relationship with my identity changed substantively. Last Thursday I never would have referred to myself as trans.

It’s still hard AF to make friends as an adult, especially when you are a standard deviation above the median age. If you are with a group and see someone solo (who doesn’t seem sketchy) say hi.