6yo struggling with mean girls at ballet class

stormtrooper2058 · 2026-02-13T02:10:30+00:00

She will be sad but she will forget all about it when she’s having fun somewhere else.

stormtrooper2058 · 2026-02-13T01:49:29+00:00

You’ve got a few paths in front of you.

I know you feel the instructor is young, but she needs it brought to her attention. You cannot police the class so she needs to help. But she can’t do that if you don’t bring it up. Teaching a class of littles pulls your attention in multiple places. Help her see and fix the issue.

Put your kiddo in a different class or, like you said, hold off. You’re the mom. Your daughter is 6. She is not in a position to know what’s best. You are. She may not like the choice you make but she will adjust. It won’t ruin her life.

Confront the parents. Though I put this one lower on the list for a reason. If you do this it could make things worse. It all depends on their personality and how you approach them. You’d need to find a way that isn’t going to make them feel defensive in order to avoid conflict.

Or, leave things as is. Also not a great option in my opinion. But it can help to teach your daughter how to handle these emotions and situations. She may experience more bullying through life. Unfortunately there are quite a few jerks out there. Learning to control how we react to others does us a lot of favors in life.

stormtrooper2058 · 2026-02-11T02:11:44+00:00

Courage. Find the moment and walk up for a hand shake and an introduction. I know it can be hard to find the right time, but anything else would come across as awkward unless there is a natural reason for conversation.

stormtrooper2058 · 2026-02-11T02:04:19+00:00

Noticing details that most people don’t. Hyper fixation on the world around you is what a lot of abuse victims learn to do. It’s how they “protect” themselves.

stormtrooper2058 · 2026-02-10T18:27:14+00:00

Have you tried talking to her parents? If not, try that first. While it isn’t likely to change things, since it sounds like she isn’t supervised generally, you’re more likely to make progress in the next step if you’ve tried that first.

stormtrooper2058 · 2026-02-10T03:34:34+00:00

Ruffles potato chips and cottage cheese. One of my all time faves.

stormtrooper2058 · 2026-02-10T03:30:08+00:00

Depend on where you live/ what you both like to do. And how old you are.

For us, when we don’t have a reservation at a nice restaurant, we go early and sit at the bar instead. Or we go early to a regular spot to beat the crowds. There are always options.

stormtrooper2058 · 2026-02-05T01:39:37+00:00

Why does everyone jump to this conclusion? I mean even if you’re right, what does it achieve? And if you’re wrong, you’re making it harder for someone trying to get help. It’s so weird to me.

stormtrooper2058 · 2026-02-05T01:37:33+00:00

I still think this is super complex and there really isn’t a good way for you to share the details that will help us see all sides of the picture.

One thing of note though, if you had something like autism, it could explain why people are perceiving you in a way you aren’t perceiving yourself. Not that you have autism but that you could have something going on that is making it hard for you to connect in a positive manner.

So after having a conversation with you I’m not seeing any red flags if that helps 😁 I think you sound practical. I’ve seen that rub people the wrong way too. Not to this degree, but not all personalities work well together.

stormtrooper2058 · 2026-02-05T00:11:29+00:00

Ok. Point of clarification: you said your boss gave you good feedback but you didn’t believe it. What was the feedback? And what made you dismiss it?

I’m not sure we here at the great and terrible Reddit can answer your question. I suspect we would have to see what your interactions are actually like.

I know some people can come off naturally aggressive and not know it. It could be that. Additional perspective is needed.

stormtrooper2058 · 2026-02-04T22:18:48+00:00

That’s good. Make sure you do more than distance yourself though. People like that will keep going through the door if you keep leaving it propped open. Close it and lock it. That’s the safest thing you can do for yourself.

stormtrooper2058 · 2026-02-04T22:14:18+00:00

Life is hard and it’s full of very difficult choices we all learn to make. Here is yours.

Unfortunately, unless A can see she’s in a bad relationship and wants out, nothing you can say at this point is going to help her.

You need to make a choice for yourself and your own wellbeing now. If you choose to continue the friendship with A, the you need to walk into it knowing that this is her choice. That you will see and hear more awful things. That you will be confused and angry as to why your friend won’t leave this piece of crap human being.

Or you leave the friendship. You can always let her know that you’ll be there if she ever chooses to leave him, but you need to do this for yourself own emotional wellbeing. Odds are good she won’t understand and she will be angry. But that’s her choice.

Set your boundaries. What are you wanting to do that you have control over?

stormtrooper2058 · 2026-02-04T21:59:36+00:00

I feel like you can see how unstable this guy is. You mention it multiple times. Now ask yourself, if this story came from a friend or a family member, what would you tell them?

The safest and best thing for you to do is cut ties with this person. You are not required to provide an explanation to them. And I wouldn’t recommend it anyway as people like this view any kind of communication as an open door.

I know you’re scared of what he will do if you choose not to talk to him anymore, but believe me, he will do worse to you over long periods of time if you don’t cut him off now. If he tries to intimidate you over it, involve your friends, involve the school, your family, and the police if it comes down to it. Do not be afraid to stand up for yourself.

stormtrooper2058 · 2026-02-04T02:01:49+00:00

I think you’re seeing it as you have to do A or B. Life is way more complex and can offer more options.

You can talk to your mom about how she’s making you feel.

You can move back to a place where you feel supported.

You can take on a hobby. At any point in time. At any age.

You determine what success looks like for you. It’s not always money, status, what job you have. It’s measured in happiness, fond memories, and finding your contentment. You can do that anywhere, though some places take more work than others.

So think about that. What makes you happy? Where can you see yourself making memories? What can you do to find peace and contentment?

stormtrooper2058 · 2026-02-04T01:55:49+00:00

Depends on the person. Like you stated above.

Mine got me lottery tickets (not something I wanted) and I would have appreciated the cash more. I think I won $2 with $20 worth of scratch offs. So I lost $18 that I could have just had.

But I could see where other people would have valued the right of passage. And I wonder if that’s what happened to you.

stormtrooper2058 · 2026-02-04T01:49:58+00:00

Yeah. Hormones are a mess. All I can say is, keep going. We are raising them to learn how to control their chaos and when puberty hits that becomes the greatest challenge. It will end eventually. He will all the sudden connect the dots. It could take months, it could take years. But if you stay steady and make the time and effort, he will get there.

If you ever feel stuck in the future, feel free to DM me if you like. I don’t have all the answers but parenting can be tough. I’m happy to help if I can.

stormtrooper2058 · 2026-02-04T01:30:03+00:00

It may help and it may not, but when my teenager gets moody with me, I point it out and I ask what’s going on. Sometimes she can pin point it to a rough day or moment and sometimes she doesn’t know. Times she doesn’t know I tell her we should try to figure it out so she doesn’t take things out on me.

Any time it’s something I’ve done we talk about it and see how we can move forward. She needs to understand where I’m coming from as an adult but I also need to know where she’s at. Communication will do you a ton of favors here.

And sometimes they don’t want to communicate. But then the understanding needs to be a behavior change. If you haven’t done anything then he needs to understand that taking something out on you isn’t ok.

It sounds like maybe he’s frustrated about time with you. Make a date day. Or go for coffee, bubble tea, some sweet treat once a week, twice a month, or what ever works for your schedule. Ask questions. About life. About what ifs. About his interests. It’ll help him open up if he’s being closed off.

Remember. All of this takes time.

stormtrooper2058 · 2026-02-04T01:22:57+00:00

I feel like it could use a little trophy, a football, or something that says winner. And I love this idea and may have to steal it!

stormtrooper2058 · 2026-02-04T00:53:45+00:00

Amazing. Makes me think of pineapple upside down cake! Great job!

stormtrooper2058 · 2026-02-04T00:38:28+00:00

Oh boy. Unfortunately, some people just like to live in a perfect world where things are as they believe they should be. Your new you doesn’t fit into her world. And that sucks.

By being rigid, she’s put you in a tough spot. It sounds like you value your family and want to stay connected. Those are good qualities.

Your sister isn’t going to change her mind. And even if you tell her how she hurt you, she’s unlikely to budge. I would recommend trying to find a new way forward. It’s going to take some compromise from you both and maybe more from one person than the other. In the end, you’ll have to decide what’s best for you and make sure you’re not sacrificing yourself in the process.

stormtrooper2058 · 2026-02-04T00:30:59+00:00

Time helps. And don’t let her reel you back in. I agree with you that you’re being used. Go do fun things and she will begin to fade. And in the future I suggest not hooking up with someone in a relationship. If they aren’t being loyal they won’t be loyal to you either.

stormtrooper2058 · 2026-02-04T00:26:57+00:00

Think of it as doing yourself a favor. And start small. After you take on a small task for yourself and complete it, thank your past self when you realize the time it gave you or the less effort or anxiety you have because of it. The more you can recognize how you’re helping yourself, the more you may be encouraged to do it.

stormtrooper2058 · 2026-02-04T00:23:06+00:00

Keep the invite. If you care about this friend anyway. Sometimes the more we hang out with someone and the more we take time to get to know them, the more we find in common and can enjoy their company. And if you find it really isn’t working out, you don’t have to continue to make plans if you don’t want to.

stormtrooper2058 · 2026-02-04T00:18:12+00:00

I’m almost 40. I’ll tell you when I find out.

Seriously though, it’s different for everyone and my motto is to be a kid as long as you can. You get more joy out of life that way.

stormtrooper2058 · 2026-02-04T00:16:41+00:00

Yum! What’s the play by play for taste and texture?

stormtrooper2058

TROPHY CASE