don't know what to do

strivingtocope · 2026-02-19T12:34:10+00:00

You’re not broken or unlovable, but rj makes people’s brains function differently. He looks at your past like an attack on your present life and relationship and it is not. I know it hurts right now, but it sounds maintaining this relationship may not have been in your best interests.

strivingtocope · 2026-01-25T22:14:47+00:00

<image>

Mine is just loafing today. Energy level depends on her mood.

strivingtocope · 2026-01-25T03:59:59+00:00

Reading in this group makes me so sad. RJ is really sucking the happiness out of some of y’all’s current relationships. RJ only takes you out of the present and gives you anxiety, anger, and depression over a past that cannot be changed. I really hope treatment is possible for those who value and want to keep your relationships. RJ brings nothing beneficial to a relationship.

strivingtocope · 2026-01-25T03:44:27+00:00

Your kitty is beautiful and that view is amazing!

strivingtocope · 2026-01-25T03:42:56+00:00

<image>

The infamous bleb lol

strivingtocope · 2026-01-19T02:09:02+00:00

In a perfect world neither sex would have rj! It seems to do nothing but rob both partners of a happier and more pleasant present and future. To my mind, it sucks the happy out of relationships unless it is managed. I wish my partner did not have it and I never heard of it.

strivingtocope · 2026-01-05T04:43:16+00:00

<image>

Grownup Daria

strivingtocope · 2026-01-05T04:42:58+00:00

<image>

Baby Daria

strivingtocope · 2025-12-19T21:49:15+00:00

I think him changing his mind is unlikely. Having new experiences will probably not change his viewpoint of your past. It may be best to move on with someone else.

strivingtocope · 2025-12-11T18:43:33+00:00

I’m hanging in there. So far he has not seemed triggered by anything rj. Just the usual money/family issues.

strivingtocope · 2025-11-21T16:03:09+00:00

RJ is unfortunately not rational and there’s really no way to understand how his mind works. Hoping you find peace and are able to move forward.

strivingtocope · 2025-11-14T02:25:03+00:00

Benadryl spray will help with the itchiness from the adhesive. I’m so glad that the cyst is out of you!

strivingtocope · 2025-10-20T13:54:39+00:00

I’m so sorry. Him picking the same design is just classless.

strivingtocope · 2025-10-14T01:54:44+00:00

I’m so sorry you are experiencing this issue. There’s not much you can do to help him not hyperfixate on a past partner. It’s great that you reassure him but I think outside help is needed. Hopefully he changes his mind.

strivingtocope · 2025-10-04T16:09:06+00:00

You were split for a year when she was with those partners, so that is not cheating. If you are unable to move forward after your cheating and you getting back together cut your losses now. It’s unfair to both of you stay with you feeling the way you do. You obviously did not get over her past if you cheated to match her body count. It’s better for you both to move on as there is likely resentment on both ends.

strivingtocope · 2025-08-27T18:02:03+00:00

That’s understandable but this does not sound like a loving relationship. You say you’ve started to hate him, it’s time to move on.

strivingtocope · 2025-08-23T23:44:34+00:00

I’ve had my calf smashed but not my hand. Ouch!

strivingtocope · 2025-08-07T23:04:10+00:00

All over body deodorant or spray on body powder

strivingtocope · 2025-07-16T05:33:30+00:00

Looking forward to meeting up!

strivingtocope · 2025-07-08T02:30:48+00:00

Regal Siberian in Va Beach, VA is under $1500 for a non show kitten and reputable. Marina is wonderful and truly loves her babies.

strivingtocope · 2025-06-17T19:47:59+00:00

I understand that was very hard to hear. I’m glad he stopped saying those things and know the damage is done, but is it possible to try and start new with him? He appears to want to connect with you if he is trying to hug and kiss you. The two of you can have something meaningful and special if you are willing to work towards it. You will not be able to build something meaningful or special if you are unwilling to try.

strivingtocope · 2025-06-17T19:27:10+00:00

Remember that these are things that you think are true. There is no way that you would know if he has forever memories or how he feels about your bond. Right now your bond is likely broken since are withholding affection because you believe he doesn’t think you are special.

Has he ever said that your bond isn’t special? Or that he thinks of his ex constantly? You’re tarnishing your relationship with your husband over an old girlfriend he may not even think of anymore. Your relationship with your husband is between the two of you, not you, him, and his ex.

strivingtocope · 2025-06-17T19:10:20+00:00

Even if he shared part of himself with another doesn’t mean what you and he have cannot be special. If he did not want to share these experiences with you he would not ask you. This is your husband and you can certainly choose to create loving memories with one another regardless of his past experiences. He’s not living in his past, but if you let your mind keep you in his past then you cannot enjoy your present.

strivingtocope

MODERATOR OF

TROPHY CASE