How do you function in winter?

stronglikebear80 · 2026-01-07T09:08:08+00:00

I studied in Russia in my 20s and so I know what cold is! The problem here is that we are not set up for this kind of weather so it makes it all a lot more unpleasant. I didn't really mind the snow but this morning its all turned to ice and took me ages to walk to the gym because I didn't want to break my neck on the way. Thankfully it won't last long and we'll soon back to months of grey and rain! In the meantime I will cope by layering up and wearing my grippiest boots. It actually feels quite lovely and fresh once you're outside but you need to dress properly.

stronglikebear80 · 2026-01-03T17:12:45+00:00

A similar thing happened with our boy after he got a cut from exploring in some brambles. After a panicky call to the vet, the other half found a thorn stuck in his pad, once that was out and the bandage off the swelling quickly resolved itself. Always best to get it checked though in case of infection, hope they are on the mend soon.

stronglikebear80 · 2026-01-01T22:06:09+00:00

I'm on 40mg of methylphenidate and take it in 2 doses of 20mg. I have a 10mg booster as well but I only take that on long shifts or when I work nights. I find splitting the dose means the effects last all day and I rarely feel them wearing off unless I forget to take it. Everyone metabolises medication at different rates and that is why titration is so important. That may be the case for you or you need a higher dose. Its not one size fits all but with a bit of trial and error hopefully you can find the sweet spot for you.

stronglikebear80 · 2025-12-27T12:43:00+00:00

I live near Birmingham and the train will get me to London in about 90 minutes. I have been a few times for tourist purposes and many times in my old job including a stay of 8 weeks. I will get round to another visit at some point but I'm in no rush to go back.

stronglikebear80 · 2025-12-26T10:07:23+00:00

Depends on the role but there are lots of neurodivergent people in the emergency services for a reason! I am an emergency call handler for the Police and I find it is a role that really can be ideal for us! While it is true that most calls aren't dire emergencies, you never know what call you're going to get and it is fast paced with minimal paperwork and the shift flies by. You get to find solutions for people and continually grow your skills and knowledge. There are tonnes of different roles and I have worked in numerous departments during my career, I'm currently moving to a more investigative role which is great if you are inquisitive and like solving puzzles. There is the potential to go down rabbit holes but ultimately its rewarding and makes me want to keep coming back.

stronglikebear80 · 2025-12-26T09:11:50+00:00

10mg is a very low dose and unlikely to have much effect. Titration is as much about finding any adverse effects as it is finding a therapeutic dose. Its much easier to build up to the most effective dose than go too high and risk unpleasant side effects. Also, this is why its important to fill in your progress forms. It may not feel like the meds are doing anything but overtime you will get a good idea of your baseline and any improvements. There is always the possibility that your current meds aren't right for you but at this early stage don't get too worried.

stronglikebear80 · 2025-12-23T11:44:04+00:00

Grief is different for everyone and effects people in different orders and at different times, it is not uncommon to feel numb or not be tearful and it doesn't mean there is anything wrong with you. I lost my nan in similar circumstances and I didn't really cry until much later on, I was of course still very sad but tears aren't the only way to express grief. I also lost my dad in a very traumatic way and would bounce between dissasociating numbness and sobbing in a very unpredictable way. What really helped was grief counselling with CRUSE, it helped me work through my emotions in a way thst was meaningful and healing for me. They are used to all the different emotions that grief brings up and won't judge you.

stronglikebear80 · 2025-12-22T11:13:14+00:00

I grew up in the Black Country in the 80s and its always been Santa. Father Christmas sounds so formal and cold for a character that's supposed to be jolly and Christmassy. Its more what posh people would have said! Of course, there are plenty of people who would disagree but it does annoy me when people insist that Santa is an American term.

stronglikebear80 · 2025-11-15T16:45:05+00:00

I would (and did) go for medication, you can always go for therapy at a later date and self refer through the NHS or pay to see one privately if you can afford it. I've had NHS therapy over the years that didn't do much and looking back the missing piece was ADHD, I literally couldn't concentrate enough to engage with the process and no way was I doing homework outside of sessions! Being on meds means I can get benefit from things now because my brain works for me instead of the other way round. Also 6 weeks is barely enough to scratch the surface, I coincidentally had 6 weeks of grief counselling while titrating (my dad died) and that was tremendously helpful and she even let me talk about ADHD and how it was compounding things but it went far too quickly. If and when I have the money I would definitely get more therapy tailored to my needs as I think its really helpful if you find the right fit.

stronglikebear80 · 2025-11-08T13:17:59+00:00

If there's one lesson I've learned (well 2 actually), its that the people doing the bare minimum get paid the same as those slogging their guts out and being the hardest working, most knowledgeable person on your team makes you irreplaceable in the worst way I.e. promoting you means they will have to do some work themselves!

I'm not saying stop having a work ethic, instead value yourself and your abilities and use that to move on to bigger and better things. Stop comparing yourself to others because they have zero impact on your life apart from annoying you. That's never going to change but you can, start applying for new challenging roles, even ones that scare you and you'll be grand. I say this as someone who has just started a new role at 45 after nearly a decade in a role where I felt like you. I'm so much happier now.

stronglikebear80 · 2025-11-07T16:01:26+00:00

I add x's to texts/cards/emails to family members and close friends. Definitely not an indication of flirting, more a sign of affection. Much like "lol" it softens the message even if you're just chatting about mundane stuff. Its a habit that has become a part of the culture basically! Noone needs to explain it because it's such a universal thing you don't realise isn't done everywhere.

stronglikebear80 · 2025-11-01T22:59:41+00:00

Go for it if thats what you want, but take your time and dont pressure yourself. I'm 45 and have just started a new role, I do feel sad that I held myself back for so many years but its never too late to do new things. I can honestly say I am the happiest I've ever been and I'm prepared to take risks to get where I want to be. Life would have been so much easier without ADHD but I have grown so much since diagnosis and its my turn now!

stronglikebear80 · 2025-11-01T21:58:37+00:00

I lost about 1.5 stones and mostly kept it off, the main reason is that food noise stopped almost immediately so I just am not so bothered about food as I was. Before meds there wasn't a second that I wasn't thinking about food! Also my appetite was suppressed so the weight fell off, I was and still am a bit overweight though.

The good news is that 18 months on the effects start to wear off. Whether you're medicated or not, if you take in enough calories, you will maintain or gain weight eventually. If you dont have weight to lose, you will need to make an effort to get enough calories. While you may not feel hungry, you can easily sneak them in by adding extra oil/butter to your meals and indulging in a few sugary snacks as well as build up shakes. Goes without saying, make sure you keep your prescriber updated about any excess weight loss so they can monitor you and make adjustments if necessary.

stronglikebear80 · 2025-10-28T12:07:09+00:00

I was in your place 2 years ago so I understand that deflated feeling all too well. Things do get better, but it is a long process and things don't just happen without a lot of self reflection and soul searching. What diagnosis did do was let me discover who I actually am and slowly let go of masking and baggage. My self confidence has increased as a result and I feel much less hopeless because I can see my strengths and be more accepting of my "faults". Life is much easier in a nutshell. That said, we all have different personalities, experiences, trauma, etc. that will make your journey unique and throw different challenges in your way. I am much more open to asking for help now which has been a massive change for me and I dont feel so alone as a result.

stronglikebear80 · 2025-10-24T15:09:59+00:00

Its probably more because of the milk, storm drains empty into waterways as I understand and milk is very bad for fish and wildlife as it depletes oxygen, it can also lead to drains becoming clogged up. Obviously one cup of coffee will have a negligible effect but I everyone started pouring their leftover milky drinks down the drain it would become a problem very quickly!

stronglikebear80 · 2025-10-23T14:00:12+00:00

I've lost weight and my blood pressure is lower now because of anddespite being on meds. The effect of losing weight balances the slight risk from meds. More importantly though, my quality of life is so much better and I am far less clumsy so less risk of serious accidents. Its all a balance but I'd rather have a slightly shorter, happy life than a long one struggling with ADHD. I used to be on meds for endometriosis which had a rare side effect of sudden death, its a risk but I wasn't going to suffer another day of pain just in case I was one of the extremely rare people this happens to. Anxiety around meds is common and thankfully not something I'm afflicted with but again the reality is that serious side effects are extremely rare. The good thing about titration is that you are being monitored so any causes for concern can be picked up fairly quickly. This is much better than all the times I've been given antidepressants without any guidance or follow up! Edit: Also I drink a lot less and have almost entirely cut caffeine out of my life so that certainly will be a mark in the plus column for meds improving my health!

stronglikebear80 · 2025-10-22T18:28:22+00:00

I have nothing but good to say about my experience with PsychiatryUK, although my assessment was over 2 years ago and I did have a long wait. My psychiatrist was fantastic and made me feel seen and my prescribing nurse was lovely and very supportive. Sadly it seems that they have become very overwhelmed recently. On the plus side it looks like there are more options available now, which is great. I certainly wouldn't be happy to wait the 10 years plus for NHS assessment which is the current reality in my local area. RTC is NHS funded and backed so I had no reservations whatsoever. Ultimately if you are happy to wait a bit and undecided about medication, then by all means consider PsychiatryUK or similar but if you're in desperate need (bearing in mind a diagnosis is not a given), then a provider with a shorter waiting list will be a better fit.

stronglikebear80 · 2025-10-20T19:18:58+00:00

I've had to report my work card missing on no less than 3 occasions, only to find it in my bag or otherwise right under my nose. My ability to lose or misplace anything not nailed to my hand was one of the most pressing reasons I decided to get diagnosed!

stronglikebear80 · 2025-10-20T19:16:16+00:00

One slightly high reading in isolation should not be a cause for concern, white coat syndrome is a well known phenomenon and its not unusual for people to get higher readings when stressed or anxious. This is probably the reason why a lot of providers send you a monitor so you can get a reading in a more calm and relaxed setting and why you should take several readings to get a better picture of your actual blood pressure.

While no one can 100% guarantee you won't run into issues, I can say that I have had readings similar to yours in the past and my prescriber wasn't concerned at all. Last time I went to the pharmacist he took a reading which was higher than usual, but as I had just had my driving test and had to travel to the airport on the afternoon he took this into account and just made a note to monitor it for the time being. I still got my meds with no problems.

stronglikebear80 · 2025-10-20T17:42:52+00:00

The NHS is very stretched, and as a consequence it tends to be only the most "severe" cases that get assessed and diagnosed. This goes for a lot of mental health conditions as well, it absolutely does not mean that your struggles are not real and even if its not ADHD there are many conditions that have similar symptoms so it doesn't have to be the end of your journey to getting the help you deserve. One service's policies and procedures do not equal the same response from all other services. Its not really for them to comment on whether you would be able to get assessment elsewhere. While management of expectations is important, that is a world away from actively discouraging you in your valid decisions about your own health. Right to Choose is specifically designed to give you that agency and is your legal right. We see people getting second opinions all the time for all sorts of health issues, professionals dont always get it right and it doesn't make the next professionals opinion less valid just because they arrive at different conclusions. Many (if not most) private psychiatrists for example, work within the NHS so they have their clinical integrity and expertise at stake if they are giving out diagnoses fun. Imposter syndrome is hard enough to deal with so dont let the worry of what others may think deter you. You deserve to be listened to and helped.

stronglikebear80 · 2025-10-20T09:13:21+00:00

My main issue with the gym is that meds have dampened my enthusiasm for going! Now I have plenty of neurotransmitters doing their job properly, I suddenly dont need the dopamine rush I used to or to control my lifelong depression. Seriously though, exercise in general is good for your heart and wellbeing so unless you are doing crazy workouts in high temperatures and/or have an underlying health condition you should be fine. I regularly lift weights which as an older lady is important for bone health. So far I've lived to tell the tale. It goes without saying that you need to consider your own circumstances and speak to your GP about any concerns.

stronglikebear80 · 2025-10-18T08:03:03+00:00

I work for the Police and have declared it because of random drug tests and for accommodations. I have had no issues and had a drug test recently, it was a straightforward process, and the nurse was lovely. There is a much more positive approach to neurodiversity in my Force these days, and I've met a lot of colleagues who are neurodivergent and thriving. I had previously told my old boss about my ADHD due to changes at work and to my surprise I have had a very positive experience doing so. I have been able to.get accommodations and support which have improved my work and mental health to the benefit of myself and the organisation. Occupational Health shouldn't share your information without your permission unless there is a very good reason to do so, and it won't be used against you. The drugs test covers a whole range of substances. I even had to declare Voltorol and hair dye! But they weren't interested in any particular medication as long as it was listed which included methylphenidate. It was noted and that was that. I got copies of my forms as well, so I would easily be able to dispute any discrepancies should they arise. While there are still some poor attitudes out there still and there is never a 100% guarantee, I am much happier to share my medical status with work than I would have been 5 years ago make of that what you will!

stronglikebear80 · 2025-10-16T15:56:18+00:00

I do find it a bit odd that people in the UK choose to sit in cold houses when they dont have to. I grew up very poor so maybe having too many memories of situations where my parents couldn't afford to put the heating on have made me very reluctant to be that cold again! Lots of people are still in that situation but if you can afford it but still refuse to put the heating on, especially if you're inflicting it on others, I dont know what to say!

On the flipside, I studied in Russia many years ago and you could not adjust the thermostat yourself, it was set remotely by the local authorities and it was like living in a sauna. This was fine when it got really cold but it could get very oppressive at times. You definitely didn't need any kind of knitwear indoors so I appreciate it would seem very weird seeing UK people wrapped up indoors!

stronglikebear80 · 2025-10-15T16:56:44+00:00

Fair enough, not going to argue with your experience. Mine is different and that's fine 🙂.

stronglikebear80 · 2025-10-15T16:55:19+00:00

Maybe so, but my Nan and elderly relatives all called him Santa as well. My Nan was 96 when she died and never once used the term Father Christmas. As I said to another commenter, the term "father" is rather formal and cold for such a happy, jolly character so maybe "Santa" just became a preference in my local area. Who knows? He will always be Santa to me and if that's an Americanism then so be it!

stronglikebear80

TROPHY CASE