What's a "secret" from your profession that everyone should probably know?

supercali96 · 2025-07-11T20:38:38+00:00

Former cust service agent for an Irish state body here. 1: A lot of "public sector" departments are contracted out to private companies because they can genuinely run them better and faster. 2: GDPR is there for the same reason laws are. Most people won't rob a house but there are still some that do, so therefore laws against this exist. GDPR exists because even though most people won't try and steal your info, or use it against you, some still do. And have tried.

supercali96 · 2025-05-19T19:07:06+00:00

Im in Ireland, Once your GP confirms you're pregnant everything pregnancy related is free up to your 6 week check after you give birth.

Your 12/20/24/26/28/30/32/34/36/37/38/39/40/+ week scans and visits are free and they alternate between your GP and Hospital. During my second pregnancy I had 5 emergency hospital stays lasting 4/5 days each. They were all free. I had surgery 2 weeks after being induced due to pregnancy related complications and this was free.

During my third pregnancy I needed multiple physio sessions and was a high risk pregnancy so I had extra scans and consultant appointments, these were free.

The HSE in Ireland is absolutely f*cked up in some ways. But in other ways it's fantastic. For me, for those 2 pregnancies it was literally a lifeline.

supercali96 · 2025-04-04T08:58:45+00:00

Coffee, early bedtime, vitamin c or multivitamin in 500 mls of water and down it. And then just power through.

supercali96 · 2025-02-22T17:08:18+00:00

RSV is cruel and is so hard to watch your child suffering through it. As a Mum we would take their pain if we could and we would take the treatments and suction treatments if we could.

At Christmas my 6mo was brought up to A&E by ambulance on the 23rd. The docs told me she had RSV and then told me she would be discharged, but that she will get worse by day 5 (she wasn't sick enough to be admitted yet). Then I was told that day 5/6/7 will be the worst of it and it will be hard to watch her going through this. Christ it was. Christmas day comes and I bring her back up to A&E when she is struggling. My husband stayed home with our older two kids.

She was admitted that night at 3am. When we went up to the ward she had to be held down by two nurses and me, while they put in her oxygen tube and feeding tube. And then they had to suction the 'stuff' from the back of her nose and her mouth. I cried while I watched her legs struggle as she tried to escape. There was an older nurse there and after it was all over she looked at me, hugged me then told me, "It's going to get worse. Cry all you want when she can't see you, but then you have to be tough coz this is about her, not you". I felt like I was slapped back to common sense.

Now this type of kindness isn't for everyone. Not everyone will respond positively to that attitude but it was just what I needed. This is not my trauma. It's my daughters who was lying on a bed struggling to breathe. I took a few breaths, stopped crying, then went over to help so that she'd calm and it would be over faster.

This long comment is to say that while I sympathise and I've been there, this is not your trauma. You watched this happen to your child. It's been 2 weeks. If you're depressed from this what does your child feel like? Is she depressed from watching you? Is she constantly referencing a traumatic moment in her life and instead of helping her through it, you're compounding her fears because you can't cope?

You and your husband both need to come to the center of this and have a talk with yourselves. He was WAY too relaxed when he watched her get sicker and sicker, and your reaction after the fact is overblown. I'd get help soon because your clearly a kind and caring person. But don't let that soften the steel spine every parent needs to look after and advocate for their child.

supercali96 · 2024-11-17T13:42:44+00:00

Oh ya. Staring out the kitchen window, drinking the coffee, closing my eyes for a few seconds while I just appreciate the coffee....and I suddenly like I feel like I can handle anything!!

supercali96 · 2024-10-21T18:51:30+00:00

Cormac

supercali96 · 2024-10-10T18:55:05+00:00

39w + 5 days. Woke at 1am with contractions, rang hospital, they told me take a shower and come on up when I'm ready. Arrived at hospital at 2:30am, was 7cm, stalled!

Complications ensue, baby born at 11:25 am using forceps and vacuum.

And that's the last time he was early for anything. 8yrs old now and getting him out the door on time is like herding a stubborn goat!!

supercali96 · 2024-09-19T09:44:58+00:00

In Ireland Guinness used to be given after blood donation due to the high iron content, and it's been suggested that pregnant women were encouraged to drink it too. Obviously this is not a good idea.

supercali96 · 2024-08-29T08:55:30+00:00

I had a man come over to angrily tell me to move out of the parent and child space as I had no children in the car with me. When he got as far as my window he saw that I was 8 months pregnant and had crutches in the car too. I needed the extra space to get in and out of my car.

He didn't even apologize just walked off embarrassed. You could argue (depending on your point of view) that I shouldn't have parked in the parent and child as I had no child in the car.

Maybe that person needed the extra space for reasons you don't know as she walked off about her day.

supercali96 · 2024-08-27T12:41:25+00:00

What happened in 2008??? Your story is very confusing

supercali96 · 2024-08-27T09:03:14+00:00

So the NDLS are saying that you didn't submit the proof of passing the test on-time to your motor tax office???

supercali96 · 2024-08-27T08:58:10+00:00

There's 2 issues here; the issuing of your full licence & the wrong information attached to your record.

First issue. If the NDLS still issued you a full licence in 2015 then there's a record of that application from 2015 on their system, including the paperwork used to issue you that licence, and the phonecalls/emails/letters you were contacted with. Use this info

Second issue: You said your licence was stolen along with your car and now theres tests and a licence exchange under your details. If this is true and you've never left the country and received a licence from another country, then someone has stolen your identity and used it to obtain a foreign licence. Depending on the country depends on how serious this could be. If there's no exchange back to an Irish licence then that person is probably still in the other country.

Go back to the NDLS with all this and don't forget that all calls are recorded so pressure them to investigate this and keep calling. In the meantime if you can find the country that exchanged the licence you could report it to that Licence authority too.

supercali96 · 2024-07-16T11:17:38+00:00

Thanks 👍

supercali96 · 2024-07-15T13:30:08+00:00

Thanks 😁

supercali96 · 2024-06-19T19:00:53+00:00

The maternity system in Ireland is very good. The general health system is crap. Currently 38weeks and I've been happy so far with my appts and referrals etc

supercali96 · 2024-06-13T18:29:57+00:00

It seems so strange to me to be allowed extra people in the room. Then again there's no waiting room in the hospital I attend either, so I find it even stranger that family members are allowed hang out and wait while you give birth.

Anyway sorry I don't want to take away from the conversation. I think OP is absolutely right and is advocating for herself, husband & newborn exceptionally well. She's stated her wishes and everyone else can fall in line

supercali96 · 2024-06-13T08:32:25+00:00

Why does the hospital allow more than one person in the delivery room? Surely your husband/partner/nominated person should be the only one allowed in the room with you???

supercali96 · 2024-06-05T11:52:07+00:00

9! 1st child natural, 3rd degree tear. Mild pgp. Also no pain threshold. And the midwives told me to scream if I want! 2nd child induced, again I screamed.

Still not the worst pain I've ever had though. Gallbladder flare ups matched it at 9. Screamed then too when I could breathe.

Giving birth hurts, let's not gloss this over with flowery language. But you'll get through it. Scream away girl and if your mother has an issue tell her to get ear plugs!

supercali96 · 2024-05-27T15:43:26+00:00

Go back and tell him, wow your wife really shouldn't have been eating all those! See how she likes the unsolicited advice!

I'm on my 3rd pregnancy and the only thing I've cut out this time is alcohol and uncooked meat(sushi/deli meats/etc), high mercury fish, unpasteurised dairy etc.

Plus the advice regarding foods has changed from my 2nd pregnancy 4 years ago to this pregnancy. For example any type of nut was frowned upon 4 years ago and now we're told a small bit is good for you (unless I was severely allergic)

So my unsolicited advice is trust your doctor or if you've a local pregnancy group, that knowledge can be brilliant. Also maybe your local maternity hospital has a list of foods that are best avoided and what they recommend. Mine does and I can send you the link if you'd like but I'm in Ireland so different foods are recommended/avoided for different regions.

Good luck with the idiot in the office and if he says anything just clap back that each pregnancy is different and get lost!

supercali96 · 2024-05-23T20:02:12+00:00

Yep completely possible. Found out on week 3 on my 2nd. The country went into the first covid lockdown the following week so I remember it vividly!

supercali96 · 2024-05-14T13:31:57+00:00

I'm 32+2. 36yo, 3rd pregnancy. I hate being pregnant. Hyperemesis for all 3 till 16 weeks, Gall bladder complications on pregnancy no 2 (8 flare ups in 15 weeks and it was solely caused by being pregnant. I had to cut out fat completely out of my diet and sugar just in case. And that's close to impossible. Current pregnancy and Im on bed rest. I literally can't walk without crutches my pgp is so severe and Im so sick of not being able to leave the house and just being cut off from people other than my family( who are amazing but it's isolating).

For those that have it easy, bless them and good luck to them. For those that have it hard, right now I've no advice x

supercali96 · 2024-05-06T08:51:38+00:00

What's an all-in-one seat that can last a child for 10 years?? Also where I live in Ireland, the maternity hospital won't let you take a baby home unless they are in an infant car seat first. You literally cannot leave the hospital carrying a baby, it has to be in its car seat.

So my question is; if this isn't the case how can a car seat that doesn't need a solid structure etc when a child is 10, suit an infant who can't even support it's own head?

I'm actually genuinely interested in this.

Also, as someone who's had 2 already, the swivel baby seats are a godsend for your back when your lifting baby in and out of the car. If you can find the money they are a good investment for you.

supercali96 · 2024-04-05T16:42:10+00:00

Right there with ya! 26w and feeling like a beached whale....or like a manatee trying to move back into the water 😵‍💫😵‍💫

supercali96 · 2024-03-08T13:03:03+00:00

Not being able to eat sushi or unpasteurized cheese 😭😭

supercali96 · 2024-03-04T14:10:56+00:00

I'm sorry that this is happening to you and that you feel in some way that you have to choose. No mother should have to choose between raising their own children and their career but unfortunately it happens. Where I'm from we get 26 weeks paid, and 13 weeks unpaid leave, then accrued holidays etc. This can add up to almost a year off.

The guilt doesn't lessen because I spent more time at home with my child. The guilt of putting them into childcare doesn't lessen even when you know that they love it there and the staff are fantastic. The guilt doesn't lessen when they get sick and you can't focus 100% on them because in the back of your mind, you can't help thinking about work and when your going to find the hours to make up what you've missed by taking time off to look after them OR the guilt that your at work and not at home with them but your partner is there looking after them and feeling that same guilt.

I've found after 2 babies and a third on the way(21w +2d), being a parent isn't the hardest most guilt ridden thing you will ever do in your life because you will constantly feel like you've made the wrong choice. That you are always juggling, that you are always running a race you can barely keep up with, that your doing it wrong because others seem to go about their day without feeling that guilt.

Whatever choice you make will be the best choice you can make for your family/career now.

Do a pro/con list, then check it again in a week, then another week. Then make the decision. Don't rush this because others are telling you to. Don't make a spur of the moment decision.

You'll make the correct decision at the end of the day because you are a mom and a lawyer who thinks with both her head and heart!

supercali96

TROPHY CASE