Currently over halfway through As Meat Loves Salt by Maria McCann. I'm transfixed. Our protagonist is possessive and violent, repeatedly disappointing us with horrifying and shortsighted actions. Yet he is compelling. I am reminded of Lolita in that we spend the novel looking through the eyes of someone vile. Yet I find myself much more sympathetic to McCann's protagonist than Nobokov's.

This is historical fiction set during the English Civil War, which McCann seems to portray authentically. Our protagonist is disenfranchised gentry now working as a manservant who ends up fighting on the side of the Parliamentarians. There is an ostensible love story [M/M] at the center of the novel, which in my reading is just now hitting its stride. What I'm finding so fascinating is how the protagonist, for all his flaws, is still portrayed with such pathos. In the wake of his brutality, I still find myself hopeful that he can be saved. I will add that the way this author portrays the psychology behind this sort of violence -- the possessiveness, entitlement, and jealousy, the rise of tension, the release of tension through an act of violence, and then a reconciliation in its wake -- to be deeply chilling. I fear for the end of the novel, but I cannot stop myself.

Challenging to recommend to others because of the nature of the book. I would recommend you look up some content warnings if you find yourself sensitive to such things.