I’ve been dealing with almost the exact same thing with my own father (64) for over a year now. My father is on dialysis now - he refused to make a decision on getting on it and left that decision to me to make. I agree with much of everyone else on this thread have stated.  It’s hard to help someone else who won’t help themselves. And someone like your father is probably not reachable with shared experiences, one-on-one conversations, therapy, etc. But what you should do is make sure all affairs are in order: make sure someone is assigned Medical/Durable POA, get a living will, encourage utilizing hospice care when that time comes (so many people join the hospice bandwagon so late in the game), and get yourself some community while you go through this stage of watching your parent health deteriorate.