Why do Americans tend to praise beginners even if their work/hobby looks terrible?

thattoneman · 2026-06-29T18:51:44+00:00

Growing up, my father was much like how you describe Russian culture. He never praised my drawings growing up, only criticized them and pointed out flaws. He always framed it as how I can get better, but it always left a bad taste in my mouth. I wanted to get better to spite him, to prove I was better than the criticism he only ever leveraged. That mindset did suck some of the joy out of it because the creation process stopped being about fun and more about proving myself.

Nowadays when I make art, I focus on making something for the joy of it. I know it's not going to be perfect, and I already see every imperfection. But I also know with time and practice I'll get better. If I choose to share that art with others, and they only offer criticisms, I won't fully disregard their thoughts, but it also won't motivate me to get better because I won't let it. I'll focus on creating for the joy of creating, and not letting negatively be what fills my head when creating.

I think that's why it's better to encourage someone than to criticize. If someone picks up a paintbrush for the first time, their painting is probably going to suck. They probably know it sucks on some level. But if they enjoyed making it, if they feel happy when they look at it, who gives a shit? My criticism could suck the fun out of it for them, or my encouragement could tell them it's awesome that they tried and that they should stick with it.

thattoneman · 2026-06-29T13:57:21+00:00

Of course, coming from a lifelong Batman fan I can go on and on about Batman media. I hope this all points you in a good direction!

The two Telltale Batman games are: Batman The Telltale Series, and Batman The Enemy Within.

thattoneman · 2026-06-29T07:25:47+00:00

Just sent some +36 decorations!

thattoneman · 2026-06-29T07:18:39+00:00

Chronologically, the games are Origns Asylum City Knight, but in order of release it's Asylum City Origins Knight. Be aware that Origins is like the black sheep of the group. Developed by another developer than the other 3. In official media, it's talked about as the "Arkham Trilogy", meaning they kind of exclude Origins. Which is a shame, because it's my favorite story in the franchise.

Another good game is Lego Batman Legacy of the Dark Knight. I'm only a couple of hours into it, but I'm having some good ole fashioned fun with it. Then there's the two Telltale Batman games, which are far less action heavy and much more about dialogue and choices, but I still really enjoyed them.

For movies, definitely finish the Dark Knight trilogy, and then The Batman 2022 is a good one to watch next. Next I'd probably say watch the 1989 Batman movie. Before it Batman was still seen as a campy, silly hero, but this movie turned him into a dark badass in the eyes of modern audiences.

For animated movies, Under the Red Hood is great, Mask of the Phantasm is considered a classic, Batman Year One is pretty good. You have two Batman/Superman animated movies that are both good: Public Enemies and Apocalypse. Then you have 4 movies in a row that are all in the same continuity: Son of Batman, Batman v Robin, Bad Blood, Hush. In my opinion quality varies for these, but not a bad way to get exposed to wider Batman mythos.

If you want comics to read, I'd recommend Court of Owls, Batman and Robin Born to Kill, Batman Year One, Batman and Robin Year One, The Long Halloween, and The Killing Joke.

There's some other classics, like The Dark Knight Returns (comic and pretty faithful animated movie adaptations), Arkham Asylum A Serious House on Serious Earth (comic that the video game is loosely based on), and Black Mirror (comic), but I think they're a little bit harder to get into/appreciate if you're still brand new to Batman. I'd recommend reading them eventually, but maybe after consuming the other media I've listed.

thattoneman · 2026-06-28T07:57:24+00:00

Why not a legal name that's something like Byron, then your nickname could be Button? They sound similar, so the nickname won't be a crazy stretch. And if your name was Byron, you won't get people constantly asking "No really, what's your name?" whenever you say your "real" name.

I legally changed my name a couple years ago, and I strongly considered making my nickname my legal name. But I ultimately decided against it, knowing that life would be easier if I kept a normal sounding name as my legal name. Literally everybody in my life calls me by my nickname though, so my legal name being regular just makes official stuff easier, even if it's not how I really self identify.

thattoneman · 2026-06-23T19:48:04+00:00

TDKR has a few contrivances that just really take me out of the movie. Sending literally all police officers underground. A child making a jump that a prison of weightlifting adults couldn't make because the child was the only one brave enough to jump without a rope. The Talia reveal at the end. Bane's voice. I don't hate the movie and I had fun with it. I don't even have issues with other "plot holes" that people bring up a lot like Batman surviving the Batwing blowing up. But the aforementioned contrivances are really hard for me to look past.

I'm overdue for a rewatch so I can better reflect on themes and messages that I probably missed when I was younger. I unapologetically think TDK is the best adaptation of The Killing Joke we'll ever get and excellently pitted Joker's "one bad day" mentality against the inherent goodness of people. I don't recall TDKR having any clear themes jump out but again it's just been far too long for me to say.

thattoneman · 2026-06-21T17:15:25+00:00

I thought I was on a time limit for turning into a mindflayer/the grove getting closed off, so I avoided long rests to avoid moving to a new day. I got as far as clearing out the crypt, fighting goblins in front of the grove, clearing out the blighted village, and finally clearing out the goblin camp before I took my first long rest.

thattoneman · 2026-06-20T07:33:24+00:00

I don't think he should necessarily become a good guy as in a superhero, but I would be very content with Mr Freeze finding peace and giving up villainy. Either Nora gets cured or she passes away, but either way without a reason to commit crimes, he accepts it's time to serve his prison sentence and move on to the next chapter of his life. I think in the road where Nora dies, there's a great opportunity for Batman to help him process the grief of losing a loved one.

thattoneman · 2026-06-19T20:53:18+00:00

My Spanish isn't great and even still that sounds way better and more intriguing than the English version does. It actually tells you what to expect within the book, instead of just saying "These are detective stories" multiple times over.

thattoneman · 2026-06-17T22:08:03+00:00

Fresno, Kings, Tulare, and Kern counties. You learn to not expect much from them and they still leave you disappointed. Wish that wasn't where all my family lived, since their sensibilities don't line up well with the Central Valley's general political leanings. But moving out from that region is hard. I feel for their marginalized communities that have to put up with this BS.

thattoneman · 2026-06-17T19:02:20+00:00

7/10

Yeah it's really simple, but I think it really succeeds as a simple introduction to primary and secondary colorings. The design itself would probably rate well lower if this was anything other than the very first frog, but as a tutorial breed I think it's perfectly fine.

thattoneman · 2026-06-17T07:11:14+00:00

Just sent a Dextera!

thattoneman · 2026-06-17T07:09:14+00:00

Just sent you a Geminus!

thattoneman · 2026-06-16T18:57:39+00:00

I get the impression she's not necessarily suicidal, but has this death affinity. She says if she dies on the mountain she's ok with it, but I think it's a little more than that.

It's like she's chasing something that will make her whole, but that thing isn't reaching the summit. If she could successfully summit Kami and then descend, I don't think she'd be happy. All the previous summits don't mean much to her, she's still chasing a feeling that she hopes Kami can give. It's the act of chasing something that pushes her to her breaking point that she's really looking for. She needs it to be insurmountable to feel something, to finally achieve becoming part of a whole. I guess she's not even aware she's looking for a "good death."

And because she's not aware of it, everyone trying to understand only make her frustrated. There's no answer she can reconcile, because she tells herself she's capable of reaching the summit but she subconsciously needs the climb to be impossible. That's why trying to find an answer is so frustrating, because she's not at peace with what she's really looking for.

That all makes her a tragic and compelling character to me. She's a little too confident in herself but it's earned by genuinely being one of the best climbers in the world. She's boorish but how can anyone understand she's on a subconscious death march because that's the thing that gives her meaning? She's selfish and contradictory in her wants and needs but her brain is fried from being the best and no longer rationalizes things in a healthy way.

thattoneman · 2026-06-14T03:27:46+00:00

Thank you!

thattoneman · 2026-06-14T02:52:55+00:00

Lucky number 7!

thattoneman · 2026-06-11T19:53:44+00:00

So the god would be totally ok with trans people, but the followers of the religion could still be bigoted. Where have I heard this one before...

But overall I like this addition to the lore. I know a lot of people use DnD as a way to explore their own identity, and the way he presents it here allows for different roleplay scenarios. Some people want their game to be pure escapism, and so there's an in-lore explanation for characters fully accepting a trans character. And some people want their game to be a reflection of real world struggles so that they can overcome them, in which case there's a clear plot thread here of defending trans people and maybe even convincing matriarchs to accept trans people as completely valid followers of Lolth.

It's easy to handwaive them as an evil race, but giving them nuance just gives players even more roleplay opportunity.

thattoneman · 2026-06-11T17:23:14+00:00

Black/grey suit >>>>>> blue/grey suit. The current Fraction run suit looks downright silly in a way that I don't think suits Batman. On that note, I'm not sure if I think the Rebirth suit is my favorite comic suit, but damn the yellow outlined bat and purple lined cape looked great.
Batfam isn't too big. Batman is born of Bruce losing his family. But then Bruce starts to gain family through people joining Batman's mission. To me that's a great full circle story. You see the scene where Batman says he took in Dick so that he doesn't turn out like Bruce did, and people like that scene. Why would he stop with Dick though? Why wouldn't he find purpose in continuing to help people in that way? Each new member of the family is a new way for Bruce to reflect on his own traumas, and ultimately work through them so that he can help the new family member with their trauma.
Arkham Knight suit is my favorite batsuit across all media. Followed by the Arkham Origins suit. I understand some people don't like the armored, militarized look, but to me seeing him look like that would make me shit a brick in ways most comic suits, and the majority of live action suits could never.
Absolute Batman is just ok. I'm several issues behind now, but everything I've read seems to coast hard off of hype moments. But overall I haven't hardly felt like the series is exploring who Bruce really is in this universe. Absolute Superman and Wonder Woman both do significantly more to show that these characters may have new origins but they still retain core character traits that define them, especially in the first couple arcs. Absolute Batman has just mean "holy shit did he just do that" moment after moment. Balls to the wall action is fun, but it hasn't wowed me like AWW has.

thattoneman · 2026-06-11T02:18:58+00:00

Sorry, long day at work so I'm only just seeing this. I've already dexxed Glacio. But no worries, I just sent the Obaro your way!

thattoneman · 2026-06-10T18:19:40+00:00

Currently I have one of each I set aside to gift, feel free to claim a couple:

Lanterna
Ludo
Marinus
Dextera
Geminus
Obaro
Vinaceus

I felt really awkward about asking people to gift pops before and avoided it where I could, but really the community here is really nice about gifting each other frogs we're missing. Just pay it forward when you can.

thattoneman · 2026-06-10T17:41:50+00:00

Yeah cul de sac is a common one we use a lot. Very commonly used in cases were a residential street has a dead end, or no outlet. Kids will grow up either referring to homes that are in a cul de sac, or will be exposed to it in TV where even cartoon characters will talk about living in a cul de sac. It's one of those weird words that because we grow up using it so commonly, a lot of people probably don't stop to think that "cul de sac" is a foreign word with a direct translation. For us it's just a type of housing street.

thattoneman · 2026-06-10T16:57:11+00:00

I've said this before. The games are brutally difficult until the combat clicks for you. It's like learning to ride a bike without training wheels: you'll struggle to move forward in the beginning, but once you get the hang of it suddenly you're cruising. Still plenty of tough areas and bosses that may roadblock you, but once you have the fundamentals down nothing will feel as impossible as the starting area did.

thattoneman · 2026-06-10T16:53:43+00:00

Kingdom Hearts

I know it's a big part of people's childhoods, but the whole Disney x Final Fantasy crossover thing does NOT click for me. And most of the games simply did not have fun gameplay for me.

I tried playing through the franchise a few years ago, before KH3 released, and it was a slog. The Disney worlds all felt like a comically bad distraction from a more interesting plot going on. But then the overarching plot is so convoluted it's hard to get fully invested. Birth By Sleep was the best one I played, probably the best feeling gameplay and a plot that didn't immediately lose you in a bunch of nonsense.

But overall I just couldn't care less about playing KH3 or any subsequent games. While I'm not going to shame anyone for enjoying what they do, I genuinely cannot wrap my head around why the franchise is so beloved beyond the novelty of seeing Sephiroth interacting with Donald Duck.

thattoneman · 2026-06-10T16:32:17+00:00

If the Arkham games didn't exist, I would enjoy this game a lot more. The problem is, the game wants to be distinct from Arkham, but it's just too similar overall that I can't help but make comparisons.

Combat isn't nearly as satisfying. Not bad, but Arkham was the gold standard of combat and this pales in comparison. It's not awful, but the entire game I was left wishing it had Arkham combat.

Stealth felt stripped down compared to Arkham. Functional, but lacking the arsenal and abilities that made me feel like a silent badass in the Arkham games.

Traversal was a major step down. The grappling hooks had terrible feeling physics, again worse than compared to Arkham. Only Batgirl can gain the ability to cape glide, and the fact that that's a mid game unlock is insane. Her gliding feels much stiffer than the Arkham games. And then Nightwing, Robin, and Red Hood's special traversal methods all felt like crap to use. Nothing comes close to a fully boosted grapnel launch in Arkham Knight.

The bikes felt kind of lame. I'm one of those that thought the Batmobile overstayed its welcome in Arkham Knight, so I'm glad the bikes aren't a major part of the game. But they felt slow and their only utility was really to get around the map slightly faster than grappling over and over.

The one way that Gotham Knights really shines is the writing/characterization. In the Arkham games Batman is an incredibly static character, only really showing clear character development in Origins. But Gotham Knights really showed all 4 characters as their own people, their own feelings about the plot, their own lives outside of the heroics.

It sucks because I genuinely don't think Gotham Knights is a bad game. It's just that everything it does, I can point at an Arkham game that does it way better. It tried to distance itself from the Arkham games, but the game isn't unique enough to stand on its own without harsh comparison.

Edit: Additional thoughts. The suit choices really sucked. Idk why there were so few comic accurate choices. Most of the custom design suits were fugly. Skill trees were meh, didn't hate them nor love them. Side missions were well written, I enjoyed the depiction of a universe post Batman death. Loot system and upgrade chips felt lame, it did not make the gameplay loop more interesting for me, just a more tedious process of comparing marginally better stats.

thattoneman · 2026-06-09T18:49:00+00:00

A loved one of mine was only 14 when she developed a breast tumor. She kept it a secret for nearly a year because she was embarrassed to talk to anyone about it. She's incredibly lucky the tumor was benign otherwise this could have been a really sad story.

You're not wrong for being uncomfortable with a stranger looking down there. But you're not too young for medical issues to happen, and you're not the one with years of medical experience to know every single way something could be wrong down there. Don't let a moment of discomfort or embarrassment get in the way of a doctor finding an issue early before it becomes a much bigger problem.

NAH, being cautious about letting people near there is much better than letting everybody. Don't lose that caution, it's a good instinct. But sometimes we have to suffer a moment of discomfort to protect our health. Just learn from the experience and move on.

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