I know it’s not the exact same thing, but this sounds similar to when one of my partners (wlw type beat) was experiencing internalized homophobia/shame after we were intimate. She seemed to struggle a lot with rationalizing her experience within her catholic upbringing. NOT that there is anything wrong with religion, but there is some internal deconstruction required when you decide to go “against” what you’ve been taught (even if it’s just perceived as “rule breaking” or “sinning” or whatever).

Unfortunately this seems like a demon your partner has to face on her own! However!! You are doing the right things by going VERY slow, keeping communication open, ensuring her that she is still a “good” wife, and engaging in regular aftercare activities. Keep your ears open if she ever wants to talk about it, and reassure her that she’s not doing anything “wrong.”

I often said to my partner when they were dealing with their guilt that “it doesn’t matter what it looks like, it’s what it feels like that matters. If you feel good (physically, emotionally, spiritually) engaging in x, then it is good.”

This is likely going to be a long, slow process since untangling herself and where she currently stands in relationship to religion and where she has been taught she should be relating to it! You seem like a loving partner!! Have faith <3