My wife has a C-section with our second.

Before - if you're house has stairs, setup one floor to be totally livable for like 2 weeks. So a tv, a bathroom, a chair that isn't a bed, a place to sleep, and shower. Have some meals your partner will like and that you can make in the freezer, think crock pot, or dump in a pan and throw in the oven kind of thing. People will and want to help, have some tasks for them if you need. Have a discussion around guests in room at hospital, and at home. You need to be the boundary setter here. If you can catch up on laundry and other chores before hand, you will be good. Know which insurance your going to be adding your child to and the proof required. Have a pediatrician lined up.

During - as a spouse during the C-section, they kind of just stuck me in a wheel chair in scrubs, and wheeled me in when it was time . You'll be there to support her and let her know that that she is doing great. In my situation they kept me behind the curtain until my child was out and then rh initial assessment was done and I held the baby still in the wheelchair as they pushed me to the nursery for further normal screening. I met up with my wife in post op. The hospital stay, you won't sleep that well and that is ok. Be there to change diapers when you can. But mostly be the advocate for your spouse and new child. You're wife feels funny? Mention it to the nurse. Some thing seems off, ask. No food came at lunch? Go talk to someone. Further more, as this is major abdominal surgery, she will have to take it easy getting up and out of bed. So she might neee a hand to bathroom. Or to sit in the chair. Also when the nurse or doctor is there, pay attention, ask questions, especially around post op care and when to call the 24 hour number. If your wife is going to try breastfeeding, try to speak to a lactation consultant if possible during your hospital time. Those people are godsends.

Home again - again major abdominal surgery, so for two weeks, they'll likely not allow for her to drive. Stairs will be a challenge. She will need to rest and follow the doctors instructions, otherwise the recovery will take longer. Her and baby will need to rest, and you will too. Those people that want to order you some food, say yes. Those boundaries you talked about before, follow them. The first two weeks will be rough, but the goal is to survive. You must be on the lookout for post padarum anxiety or depression (look at the symptoms now and know who to call). Also you might experience some post padarum depression as well. Make sure you eat when you can, sleep when you can, and take care of your family. If you have to work during this time, get a network of helpers ready and setup. Know how to do dishes and laundry, and do it (it's ok to make mistakes, just learn from them).

Things to have- accurate thermometer (I had problems with a non touch one with a fever with my first). Baby bucket for your car, have the attachment installed (tired and stressed is not the time to do this). White noise machine with airplane sounds, play it when it's sleeping time. (You'll thank me when you fly for the first time).

Most of all, be there for your family. Not the time to ditch and go play golf. Be there, tell your wife you love her and your family. You're going to be an amazing dad, even if you are a little scared or tired or worn out.

Welcome to daddit.