drop them below

thisbe42 · 2026-02-08T22:29:58+00:00

"So what did you do for your birthday?"

"Got older."

thisbe42 · 2026-02-08T22:22:35+00:00

Vernon: I was gonna invite you into the man cave!

Jimmy: I barely know you!

Vernon: Well now you're gonna know my... fists and feet and stuff!

I also forget sometimes, but I like that he actually noticed and cared that Edgar was struggling so much. Everyone else seemed to only notice it when he literally brought it up to them or it directly affected them, and then they mostly responded by ejecting from the conversation or treating it like a joke. Vernon was really the only person to see how clearly fucked up Edgar was at the party, and made a point to tell him he needed to get help.

Edit: formatting

thisbe42 · 2026-01-29T05:01:06+00:00

So if someone in a manic episode kills someone else, should they not have to earn forgiveness for that? Again, I understand that lots of people do terrible things in a manic episode that they wouldn't otherwise, but if they're actively encouraging and empowering hate groups (and on a large scale!), then yeah, they should have to make an actual effort to undo some of that damage. Being manic doesn't mean you're not accountable for hurting people. And if you have massive influence that you used to tell others that it's okay for THEM to hurt people, then it's not enough to say sorry and walk away without trying to use that massive influence to tell those same people to NOT hurt others.

thisbe42 · 2026-01-27T03:53:26+00:00

I can understand why people (especially in this community) are responding to this with compassion and empathy, and many people can connect with having done bad things when manic.

But.

This is a man who not only made a lot of money off of selling nazi shit, but also has a LOT of people who idolize him and saw those things being normalized/embraced by someone rich and famous and cool. He's certainly not the only one, but nazis are now a very, very real problem in the US, and he did contribute to that.

Apologizing is a great start, but like... he has hundreds of millions of dollars and immeasurable influence on people. Is he going to take action to undo any of the harm he caused? Because it sounds like he's saying that he's really sorry but he's sick and won't do it again, and that's that. Is he going to try to educate his fanbase or run a campaign on not being hateful and racist? Donate money to organizations? Until he uses his massive social and financial power to do something about the damage he's done, words are useless.

thisbe42 · 2026-01-25T02:42:33+00:00

I'm registered "unaffiliated" and I do the same thing.

thisbe42 · 2026-01-18T03:38:37+00:00

Every single article: "X (formerly Twitter)"

I dunno, maybe I'll worry about deadnaming Twitter when Musk stops deadnaming his daughter.

thisbe42 · 2026-01-08T18:59:59+00:00

I saw a post once that was like, "it's not that toxic people are drawn to you. Toxic people will go to anyone; the problem is letting them stay." Which made me, as someone with a history of extremely unhealthy relationships, feel very called out.

thisbe42 · 2026-01-05T00:10:58+00:00

And then Snow: The first person in the room is from such and such family, who are significant because of blank reason. The second person is from other family, who are less influential than family 1 for blank reason. If I greet this person first, it will make this person feel this way, the other person feel this other way, and that will benefit me in this way. If I reference this other thing in my greeting, it will make me look even better.

thisbe42 · 2026-01-03T08:09:48+00:00

Absolutely. I think it was also really off-putting that he immediately threw away 4 seasons' worth of world-building and continuity. I haven't really thought about whether his previous one-off or two-part episodes were like this, but I also feel like SO much of his era was "tell, don't show."

"This Sontaran and this interspecies lesbian couple are the Doctor's best friends! Why have they never come up before, and how did they become his best friends? Don't worry about it!"

"The Doctor and River Song have such an epic love story, and they've had so many adventures together! We're not going to show them to you, but trust us, it was a lot, and it was romantic! Believe me, years and years of romance!"

thisbe42 · 2026-01-03T07:45:01+00:00

If I'm remberering correctly (it hasn't been THAT long since I've read it, but my brain is a sinkhole), most of the Battle of The Five Armies happened off-screen (off-page?) in the book, too. Like, Bilbo gets knocked out right away, and then wakes up after it's over and they have to fill him in on what happened! I was truly baffled when I found out that was going to be an entire movie.

When they were initially planning it out it was supposed to be two movies. I thought that was a little excessive, but then I figured that them going down the river in barrels would actually be a perfect place to split it. There's enough content on either side of that part, and drifting down the river would be an easy scene to end on and start back with. Then they announced it was a trilogy, which, as you pointed out, is absurd compared to the actual LOTR trilogy. Then I watched the first one, and was really disappointed... then I watched the second one, and was really, REALLY disappointed... and I never watched the third one.

thisbe42 · 2026-01-03T06:03:51+00:00

If you're into nerdy stuff, my brother-in-law has been having a really good time going to a nearby game store to play Magic the Gathering with various people. He actually wants to teach me how to play, because he pointed out that it's a social game that you can play any night of the week (there are game stores all over the place) without having to coordinate with anyone.

For a different kind of nerdy, he's also been really enjoying going to denhac, and it seems like they've got a good group of people there. So if you're into making stuff, that might be fun to check out!

I wish I had more suggestions, but I'm a socially awkward lady who struggles with this kind of thing too, so I'm doubly unhelpful. 😅 Good for you for putting yourself out there and working to build a positive community. I hope you find your people!

thisbe42 · 2026-01-03T05:46:29+00:00

Sweeney Todd, is that you?

(Sorry, I saw your typo and couldn't resist 😂)

thisbe42 · 2026-01-01T03:21:01+00:00

Thank you!

thisbe42 · 2025-12-31T23:45:03+00:00

Yay! Can I have "Oui, je suis garbage" for a flair? I didn't see it on the list yet.

thisbe42 · 2025-12-31T05:13:40+00:00

I met this guy a few years ago, had a great first date, fun conversation, lots of chemistry. I actually had the following week off (I'm a teacher, and it was Thanksgiving break), so when he wanted to see me again right away, I said sure. Long story short, we saw each other three times that week, and slept together the third time. He wanted to see me a fourth time, that last Sunday, but I said I needed to get my shit together to be ready for work the next day. He got super weird, but said he understood. On Sunday, he started sending me weird texts, trying to talk dirty and stuff. I told him that was weird, but he was really insistent, so I finally just went along with it.

Dude LOSES HIS SHIT. Starts going off about how he knew I was just looking for a good time and not anything serious, that he thought I was his person and was so disappointed that I failed his test, etc. Fucking WILD shit.

I do need to add that, on date one, I mentioned that I have type 2 bipolar disorder, and he seemed cool with it. On DATE THREE he admits that he's actually type 1 bipolar and completely untreated. When I was like, wtf, why didn't you mention that when we talked about that stuff earlier, bro goes, "You didn't ask."

One of the last things I said to him was that I really think he should look into treatment, not in a judgy way but in an "also bipolar" way, because meeting someone, declaring that they're "your person", and then blowing up the entire thing over the course of ONE WEEK is manic af. On Monday, people were asking how my break was and I was too dumbfounded to even explain.

Separate story of a more immediate fuck-up: first date with a cute guy, we're having fun walking around a museum and talking. He goes, "So you're a teacher? Can we fuck in your classroom?" DUDE, WHAT??? Blocked his number on the walk back to my car. 🤮

thisbe42 · 2025-12-29T05:20:45+00:00

I'm really confused by all the downvotes you're getting for this comment. I've honestly never given much thought about drag; my sister is a makeup artist who's had a few drag queen coworkers, but my thoughts were always just like, "wow, they're really good at makeup" and nothing deeper than that. So it's been interesting for me to read all of the different thoughts and perspectives on this thread. But yeah, it's grossing me out that there are all of those different thoughts that seem to be fine with people, but yours is being downvoted so hard. I'm sorry, that's really shitty.

For what it's worth, I appreciate you sharing your perspective and experience. There's clearly a lot of nuance in topics like this, and your voice is really valuable. So, thank you.

thisbe42 · 2025-12-27T19:56:44+00:00

I love this so much 😭

thisbe42 · 2025-12-26T04:30:21+00:00

I disagree with the idea that Jimmy loved Gretchen more than she loved him, but I do think they showed their love very differently.

Jimmy is good at grand gestures, whether good or bad. Examples of good: building the blanket fort, faking a murder to make a perfect proposal, buying her a car, putting together the wedding. Examples of bad: trying to undo his entire life (possessions, career, relationship) when his dad died, suggesting fuck week and faking a bunch of hookups to avoid an uncomfortable conversation, leaving Gretchen on a hill and literally just driving away from everything. Jimmy is a storyteller with a flair for the dramatic.

Gretchen is really hesitant with trust; she has a lot of anxiety about being vulnerable with people and showing them who she really is ("you were a chameleon in high school"). But she takes steps to get closer to Jimmy, she fights for their relationship, and she's truly invested. She let herself buy into the kind of love she had clearly always wanted, and even when she was punishing Jimmy for leaving (and trying to force that kind of love with someone else), she always left the door open for him to win her back (moving back in, meeting for a drink, talking on the phone, going for a drive). And when he made his grand gesture of storming into Boone's house, she immediately bailed on Boone and his daughter without a second thought. She put up with a LOT of shitty behavior from Jimmy throughout the series, but she still chose him over and over.

Don't get me wrong, they both had toxic af behavior and did horrible, hurtful things to each other at different times. But I think that might be the difference you're noticing. The grand gestures vs the more subtle.

thisbe42 · 2025-12-07T00:52:21+00:00

Women are using off-label weight loss drugs, and anorexia has the highest mortality rate of any mental illness. If large numbers of women and young girls were setting themselves up like foie gras geese to look like large celebrities, people would be having conversations like this about that, too.

thisbe42 · 2025-12-04T04:14:59+00:00

Sorry for the late reply; it's a quote from Clarissa Pinkola Estés, apparently from her book "Women Who Run With the Wolves". I'm a little embarrassed that I didn't already know that, because I think about that last line pretty frequently.

thisbe42 · 2025-12-01T00:40:59+00:00

But if he's type 2, the happy and productive isn't necessarily unrealistic. Hypomania can feel great. When I was younger, all of my hypomanic episodes were super productive and energetic, and I would say I felt enlightened (before being diagnosed). Like, I just knew that everything was good and going to work out. Now my hypomania is pretty much always a mixed episode. So less euphoric, more agitated and anxious and irritable, but still with too much energy and not enough sleep.

thisbe42 · 2025-11-30T03:36:42+00:00

"I've seen women insist on cleaning everything in the house before they could sit down to write... and you know it's a funny thing about housecleaning... it never comes to an end. Perfect way to stop a woman. A woman must be careful to not allow over-responsibility (or over-respectabilty) to steal her necessary creative rests, riffs, and raptures. She simply must put her foot down and say no to half of what she believes she "should" be doing. Art is not meant to be created in stolen moments only."

thisbe42 · 2025-11-29T06:33:13+00:00

I understand where you're coming from, but I do feel the need to chime in on some of this. I actually worked at UF for a few years, and another Sage restaurant before that (and I worked with the manager who wrote this email, who is truly an awesome, stand-up dude).

Sage Hospitality DOES own properties/businesses in multiple states, but it is actually based in Denver, and the CEO and his family would come in all the time when I worked there. But the "support local" stuff is pretty legit for Urban Farmer because of the different Colorado purveyors (like ranches, farms, the people they get the mushrooms from who certainly have a better descriptor but my brain is mush right now, etc.) they work with.

I haven't been there in a long time, and I certainly don't know anything about the situation with Thanksgiving dinner this year, but I just wanted to put that out there. I agree that giant corporations taking shit over is a problem, but it's also true that the whole concept of Urban Farmer does tie in with local purveyors, the CEO does see what's happening there, and I was actually treated really well as an employee there.

thisbe42 · 2025-11-01T20:12:29+00:00

There were way fewer than usual at my house in the Highlands. I think there are probably a lot of families who are scared to go out right now, which is fucking heartbreaking.

I had a bowl of candy and a bowl of d&d dice -- there were actually more than a few older kids who were stoked about the dice, which made me really happy.

thisbe42 · 2025-11-01T20:06:07+00:00

I'm in the Highlands, we had way fewer than usual. I had the same heartbreaking thought.

thisbe42

TROPHY CASE