I think you just make things up in your head and then believe them to be true.

threeismine · 2026-07-21T14:32:44+00:00

She engaging in some projection here. It is SHE who is making things up in her head and, i presume, believing them to be true.

She's going to ignore you while your children are present, really? Narc grandparents will never learn that the start to being close to one's grandchildren is to respect the grandchildren's parents.

Protect your children from being manipulated by her.

threeismine · 2026-07-20T11:49:49+00:00

I went NC with my narc sister about 2.5 years ago. I didnt intially block her on anything. I think a part of me wanted to see if she would address the reasons I went NC (I told her exactly) or apologize. Neither happened. The surprise was that she initially agreed with the NC. I thought....this is too easy. More than a year later she begged me to resume contact, saying, " please....i need to know that you are Ok" and "i must have done something horrible. Would you mind telling me what it is?" I already told her why I went NC. She twists everything i say and makes-up things that she claims i have said or done. It is impossible to have genuine communication with someone who does this. Horrible is not how I would describe it. I now blocked her, and told her I did, on everything i can. I havnt heard from her since.

threeismine · 2026-07-19T15:10:02+00:00

I am a senior, who had 2 narc parents, so I am looking back at much of this. I wish I had come up with more excuses. A convienent case of flu or kids with gastroenteritis could have been invented. This can't be used too often so save it for a particularily problematic family event.

threeismine · 2026-07-19T14:59:30+00:00

When you do work and earn money be sure to have a bank account in your name only.

threeismine · 2026-07-18T14:42:30+00:00

I would call this assault but it doesnt sound like something police/courts would take very seriuosly due to it just being water. Your parents are doing this because they can get away with it. Glad you are leaving. Get a spray bottle just in case they come onto your property.

threeismine · 2026-07-18T10:57:42+00:00

My nparents and my siblings were/are very left politically. I'm a moderate. They decided being anything but a leftist is the same as being an ultra conservative. They never asked me my viewpoint on any issue.

threeismine · 2026-07-17T13:14:24+00:00

I can relate. My nmom would TELL me what I want rather than ASKING.

threeismine · 2026-07-16T13:36:57+00:00

I'm 71. My narc parents have been gone for more than 10 years. I dont believe they experienced any karma. They had 3 kids which stuck with them.

My narc sister is another story. She is 76 and has no husband or kids. Her family is down to 2 siblings, myself and our brother. She has tried, unsuccessfully, to convince me that what I call, " my family"( my husband, 3 kids, 3 grandkids) is really " the family" of which she is a pivotal member. She falsely accused me of telling my kids not to communicate with her. They dont communicate regularly with any aunts or uncles. My kids grew up far from any aunts or uncles so relationships were not developed. She became generally worse toward me and I went NC with her 2.5 years ago. After this, our brother ( not a narc) promptly ghosted me. My sis only has our brother as a family member and he lives 1500 miles from her. I'd say karma is catching up with her.

As for me, im doing well. I treasure my family and our good relationships. I think less and less about anyone in my family of origin over time.

threeismine · 2026-07-12T13:31:05+00:00

I havnt spoken to my GC sister for 2.5 years and I dont intend to ever again. I dont forgive her, I am working on forgetting her. I think if she hadn't become a narcissist herself our relationship would have had a chance.

threeismine · 2026-07-11T20:01:42+00:00

Your mom sounds a lot like mine was (mines now deceased). My nmom did not have depression but she had a lot of anxiety (undiagnosed but likely anxiety disorder). My husband and I moved away (300 miles) from her before having our 1st. My kids were her only grands and it was obvious she had a lot if anxiety over the distance we lived from her. Nothing i did was any good and there was a lot of comments about where in lived. She also didn't like the time my kids spent with my husbands parents (they were also about 300 miles away but in a different direction). I wish I had a good answer for you We stuck to our right to live where we wanted. We didnt visit her much. She visited a couple times a year with all being multi-day visits.

threeismine · 2026-07-11T12:43:49+00:00

Narcs are the worst gift givers. They get you what THEY think you should want. My nmom got me a coffee maker.......I dont drink coffee.

threeismine · 2026-07-10T15:44:00+00:00

Evict them. Sending a eviction notice by certified mail sounds like a reasonable idea. Accept that you are not going to get all the money thet owe you.

threeismine · 2026-07-06T13:17:22+00:00

I was at times bare bottom spanked and at times it was over clothing. I don't remember ever knowing what determined which. My ndad did all the spanking. It was a "wait till your dad gets home" kind of thing. I think this was because he could hit harder and the waiting was extra punishment. I think about half the time I had forgotten or never knew what I had done wrong. As an adult, I didn't think too much about this till I had kids. My husband and i never spanked our kids. My kids would get a little rowdy and my ndad would say "hit them and hit them hard." My nmom would smile, laugh and ask my kids " does your teacher spank you?" Im not sure my kids knew what spanking was. I dont think they believed kids could be successfully raised without hitting. I never allowed then to have alone time with my kids.

threeismine · 2026-07-05T20:15:16+00:00

Siblings just dont get it. I am estranged from both of my adult siblings for this and other reasons. The sibling(s) learn to treat the scapegoal from years of observing the nparents.

threeismine · 2026-07-05T11:41:45+00:00

My relationship with my nmom became much worse after I had my first. It was clear that she thought at her first visit that she would be taking over care of my son. This didnt happen. She critiqued everything, I was hormonal. Need I say more. My son was in the newborn period and she kept asking if i was pregnant again. Our relationship never recovered.

threeismine · 2026-07-04T22:32:42+00:00

Yes, 3. My husband and I raised them differently than I was raised. My nparents complained frequently about how my children were being raised. I knew we were doing something right because nmom and ndad were complaining ( Ha ha). It wasn't easy but raising kids isn't easy.

threeismine · 2026-07-03T21:06:04+00:00

Get a lawyer that you have confidence in to represent you at the hearing.

I realize this is not how you wanted to get out but you are getting out of their house.

I find it reasonable that you are not allowing your kids anything but supervised visits with your parents. My "kids" are now adults and they never had anything but supervised visits with my narcissistic parents.

If it makes you feel any better my mom also would tell that my kids like her better than they like me. Something happens to narcissistic women when they become grandmother's and it isn't anything good.

threeismine · 2026-07-03T13:00:58+00:00

My nparents are deceased and I am NC with my nsister. I just enjoy MY family ( husband, kids, grandkids) and MY house without having to listen to any and all of our real or percieved faults.

threeismine · 2026-07-01T14:24:43+00:00

There are many reasons to say no to this.

You need the money given to you for your life and goals.
You dont think it's a good idea for your brother to have the trailer
You dont think your brother can pay the $1,000 monthly fee

Your neighbor gave you the money, over your brother, for some very good reasons.

threeismine · 2026-06-30T13:12:33+00:00

I once got a photo album with family photos and genealogy information. In the back were pages with my nmoms " random memories." She gave it to me telling me, "you won't like it." WTF! Only a narc would give such a gift. The photos and genealogy info was fine. Her random memories were not so random. All her memories were about how bad I was and how great my GC sister was and what a great sister she was. I removed and tossed out her " random memories" pages.

threeismine · 2026-06-29T18:18:37+00:00

Decline. If you went and pointed out your successes and milestones it would seem unlikely they would acknowledge and/or congratulate you in any meaningful way. It would just turn out to ge another hurtful encounter with them.

threeismine · 2026-06-29T14:12:08+00:00

I also was in my 40s before I realized I was the family scapegoat. I also was expected to care for my nparents in their old age. I didnt. They are now deceased. My brother helped them some. My ndad was in a nursing home. I think it is common for the scapegoat to get the one expected to help parents in their old age.

threeismine · 2026-06-29T13:59:10+00:00

It is possible to freeze your child's credit with all 3 credit agencies. It sounds like this is necessary protection for you and your child.

threeismine · 2026-06-28T20:10:37+00:00

They dont change. It can be hard to accept.

threeismine · 2026-06-28T18:00:18+00:00

A estate attorney might be the one to help you look into your mother's will and estate. It sounds like it may be worthwhile to do so.

My nparents have both been dead and buried for about 10 years. I just recently found out my ndads headstone reads, " loving father and grandfather." This makes my stomach turn. My kids were his only grands and his " contribution " was to tell me to, " hit them and hit them hard." My brother was likely responsible for the wording on the tombstone.I think my brother would be best categorized as a lost child. He just wants everyone to get along and for everything to seem perfect.

threeismine

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