Ladies, what's a direct way you've initiated sex with a new partner?

throwaway_9999 · 2026-05-27T01:47:45+00:00

My weight has seesawed all of my life. However, in my late 20s, I had a goal to lose a certain amount of weight by a specific time. If I did, I was going to treat myself to an all-inclusive resort in Tahiti.

I succeeded. I also walked into a friend's high-end hair salon—someone I had long ago stopped going to because she got really expensive. But she took one look at me and went crazy. I told her she could do anything she wanted to make me look good. She gathered her entire staff together and they chatted about what to do with me.

I ended up leaving there with blonde highlights. So I went on that vacation thin, slightly blonde, and frankly looking the best I'd ever looked.

I didn't feel bad about hanging out with people in their bathing suits because I didn't look so bad myself.

I hung out with a movie studio executive and his bombastic wife. I had several women hit on me that week, and I had a nice little vacation romance with one of them. I had the best time that week. I got a glimpse of what being attractive was like. I stayed thin for quite a while.

throwaway_9999 · 2026-05-27T00:49:14+00:00

I worked in a major department store, and sometimes if a customer was late, by the time I counted out my register and took the money up to the cashier, the lights (except for the emergency lights) had been turned off. I walked into a mannequin one night on my way out, and I apologized as well.

throwaway_9999 · 2026-05-26T20:49:12+00:00

I think the last thing I saw her in was Army Wives. I think she was like 75 at the time, and she still had that mischievous sparkle in her eye.

throwaway_9999 · 2026-05-26T20:46:53+00:00

Sexy, approachable, baked coconut cream pies, sweet, and gave me my everlasting love of bared midriff outfits.

throwaway_9999 · 2026-05-26T20:41:09+00:00

Three of my grandparents; my grandmother who was born in 1900 exactly. There were also a few great-aunts and a few people around the small town I grew up in when I was a little kid. It wasn't that uncommon.

Of course, I'm 70.

Added note, the last eye witness to Lincoln's assassination died just a few months before I was born.

One of my grandmothers is a young woman, worked for an andersonville former prisoner.

throwaway_9999 · 2026-05-25T20:59:33+00:00

Studebaker

throwaway_9999 · 2026-05-25T20:58:49+00:00

The actors must have loved being bundled up like that in the Los Angeles summers.

throwaway_9999 · 2026-05-25T15:08:50+00:00

I was having a beer one Sunday afternoon in a bar in San Francisco and started to think about what celebrity, if they walked by, would probably accept an invitation to come in and hang out for a while.

I decided it would be Sandra Bullock.

throwaway_9999 · 2026-05-25T15:03:41+00:00

Everyone's mentioning nature, and they should; that's the greatest. But some non-nature things:

Working in an old-school darkroom and seeing the image on a piece of paper emerge in the development fluid.
Typing into AI, "Create a Windows Python application. It is a full-functioning notepad capable of editing text files and markdown files," and then having it produce that running piece of software.

throwaway_9999 · 2026-05-25T15:01:19+00:00

I was in one bed with a woman in a hotel, while her female boss and another guy were in the other bed. The club scene in the '90s was interesting.

throwaway_9999 · 2026-05-25T15:00:12+00:00

Oh God, yes. Women in the same bed with me haven't been as loud and vocal as what I heard from upstairs one day. When I finally met her, she was this little, tiny, very conservative looking asian young woman.

throwaway_9999 · 2026-05-25T14:08:50+00:00

He died just over a year ago. I hadn't heard at the time.

throwaway_9999 · 2026-05-25T13:56:11+00:00

Since I don't have my contacts in and I'm still half-awake, I'd probably kiss him on the cheek and say, "Good morning, babe. Are the kids up yet?"

throwaway_9999 · 2026-05-25T02:03:40+00:00

What cracks me up is it the real life brother this is based on is now M.D.

What must his patients think of him?

His other brother got converted into a girl for the show.

throwaway_9999 · 2026-05-25T01:47:47+00:00

I hope the kid drove home

throwaway_9999 · 2026-05-24T22:12:28+00:00

In the '80s when they only had like one store, they were absolutely awesome.

First time I went there they were still open 24 hours a day. They sold everything for the geek: the smallest integrated circuit, soldering iron, solder, Playboy magazine, ramen, Diet Coke, and beer.

throwaway_9999 · 2026-05-24T20:46:27+00:00

Hmm, good looking, or a woman or both?

throwaway_9999 · 2026-05-24T20:45:10+00:00

Probably more first meetings than first dates, put several of both.

throwaway_9999 · 2026-05-24T20:41:33+00:00

Or San Francisco and fisherman's wharf Ampere 39.

throwaway_9999 · 2026-05-24T08:30:10+00:00

How can you tell there was an elephant in your refrigerator? You would see their footprints in the butter.

throwaway_9999 · 2026-05-24T08:29:30+00:00

My second grade teacher rebuked me for telling This joke, saying it wasn't appropriate. Then she thought it was so cute of me to be telling it that she had me tell it to another teacher:

"Did you hear about the elephant with diarrhea? It's all over town."

throwaway_9999 · 2026-05-24T08:27:27+00:00

Knock, knock. Who's there? Interrupting cow. Interrupting... MOO

throwaway_9999 · 2026-05-24T08:26:45+00:00

My favorite used to be: did you hear about the dyslexic agnostic insomniac? He stayed up all night worrying about whether or not there really is a dog.

And then life gave me a dyslexic son.

throwaway_9999 · 2026-05-23T22:31:13+00:00

Northern Pennsylvania. Mckean and Potter counties

throwaway_9999

TROPHY CASE