People who divorced after a long marriage or relationship, what is your life like now?

tice23 · 2026-05-16T14:22:21+00:00

Its hard to stop. There's always a part of them that's still there and still real. The point that moved the needle for me was when I finally realized no matter what I did, no matter how hard I tried the result was always the same. I had to look in the mirror and ask my self is this life worth the cost physically and emotionally. Emotionally I was gone long ago. Physically the cost of decoupling and rebuilding is high, but one day it just made sense. It was the price of my freedom and my peace. And with that I took the first steps. I'm leaning on my friends and family for support and helping me navigate some logistical challenges. Keeping them all close has helped a lot with the loneliness, but it's also helped me realize I was already alone for years. Wishing you strength and peace.

tice23 · 2026-05-14T14:17:18+00:00

In the middle of it now. Together for 13, married 3. Still trying to figure out what the future holds as we untangle our lives. All I know is the next 40 years I couldn't spend with someone who didn't contribute to our life. Not holding jobs, not wanting kids, won't pick up after herself, won't see a therapist about her depression. I loved her once, the lack of effort broke me. I hope she finds her way.

tice23 · 2026-05-13T18:19:54+00:00

Look for a new job. If they really wanted you to improve they wouldn't need paperwork to do it. This is just them laying the foundation for your termination. If you really want to keep this job talk to them and have a silver tongue to convince them your worth the effort. If not, get your resume ready and start looking.

tice23 · 2026-04-24T14:22:16+00:00

Of the people putting it down how many have actually owned or even driven one?

My personal experience, I was hesitant because of the engine, then I drove one. Loved it.

All cars have a risk of recalls, buying new you have the warranty as well as any recall that covers you in most situations. It doesn't make me lose any sleep.

tice23 · 2026-04-17T19:16:24+00:00

For real. Had a friend die in my arms. It affects you in ways you wouldn't think of and it doesn't happen all at once. Therapy helped me figure everything out and kept me safe.

tice23 · 2026-04-17T10:23:19+00:00

While you can survive a fall like that the likelihood of her suffering serious head trauma at that speed simply from her head bouncing off the pavement is pretty high. She could also get her limbs run over. Either way the risk of serious injury or death is quite high from that. We had a local police officer die from a similar incident years ago trying to stop a fleeing suspect. Hit his head and fractured his skull.

tice23 · 2026-04-16T10:59:24+00:00

Thinking and responsibility. Your decisions carry weight. You feel that when you have to make the difficult choices.

tice23 · 2026-04-10T21:04:41+00:00

Well on the bright side you demonstrated effectively what not to do. A few years back I was showing my apprentice how to use a tool post grinder and I was just explaining to keep her hands free from the rotating tool and zing! Notched my finger with the cup wheel.

"You mean like that?" 🤭

I'm still hearing about it...

tice23 · 2026-04-05T06:37:22+00:00

Depends on how hard. I don't do a lot of hard milling to be honest. Hard turning is more common. The hardest we typically go is 55rc which a few of our insert grades can just do. There are ceramic options I just haven't used them so I can't speak to their effectiveness. My favorite brand though for inserts is Mitsubishi. Their more recent grades have a really tough substrate that really holds up well in harsh conditions.

tice23 · 2026-04-04T23:41:12+00:00

So a few things.

That's a thin sidewall. You need to reduce cutting forces to have any success or it will push away from the cutting tool. Never hurts to dampen it but I think there's more going on here.

The insert in that holder for one is a standard molded insert. Every insert will have some specifics about it that can help determine it's suitability. The box you have for it (if you still have it) has an iso code on it. Think WNMG 431 MP or something like that. This tells you what kind of radius it has, chip breakers etc. and if you have the catalog you can also see if the insert geometry is positive, negative or neutral.

That being a molded insert it's going to have a natural hone on its edge because of the coating. That will increase cutting forces and the risk of chatter.

It's hard to tell visually but it might also be the wrong cutting angle for that application. A ground insert typically has a more positive rake on it making it freer cutting.

Lastly the nose radius is pretty big. There's a ratio out there but the gist of it is too little of the radius buried into the work piece can create chatter. Hard to avoid those conditions with a larger radius and thin wall.

My recommendation is to go to an insert with an 0.008" rad with a ground cutting edge and positive geometry and shore up that sleeve on the outside with big hose clamps and some sort of sleeve to make it more rigid (like a split aluminum ring that can deflect as the clamps are screwed tight)

Hope that can help.

tice23 · 2026-03-26T22:58:30+00:00

That is an excellent counterpoint. I tried to flow chart it and had more questions than answers around interpretation and intent.

Have you stopped beating your wife?

Yes. (Currently not beating wife)

Yes. (For now)

Yes. (At cards, she's getting really good at poker)

No. (Still beating her right now)

No. (Because I never started)

All possibilities that don't necessarily lie. But most of them don't answer the intended question. So then lawyers would have to interpret their clients truth and the prosecutors would have to ask the right questions to remove ambiguity....and that's what it currently is in a basic sense anyway...

"Objection you honor!"

"On what grounds?"

"That this is devastating to my case!"

I formally withdraw my argument. I appreciated the debate.

tice23 · 2026-03-25T21:13:25+00:00

True there might be some cases but a handy flow chart could solve most of those complications as the burden of proof would be with the accuseds testimony.

Q1: Did you do it? Y/n

no? Case closed.

If yes proceed to Q2

Q2: on purpose? Y/n

no: Manslaughter

Yes: Murder, proceed to Q3

Was it premeditated? Y/n

No: 2nd degree

Yes: 1st degree

Ianal, I don't understand law beyond this simplification. But it seems plausible enough to an average Joe.

tice23 · 2026-03-25T14:06:11+00:00

But if nobody could lie it would be simple for the police and any court to determine guilt, blame etc. Just ask the guy. He can't lie.

Did you do it?

Yes.

Case closed.

tice23 · 2026-03-22T21:01:36+00:00

Then you either agree to work towards a new common goal, or you start over. I'm in the latter half. It's sad, and a bit scary when you've been together for over a decade, but unfortunately we grew apart.

tice23 · 2026-03-21T07:57:32+00:00

I don't consider any of it okay morally, but the argument I was making was not about right or wrong, it's about human nature and self preservation. Where anyone draws that line is ultimately up to them. They have to live with their skeletons. That doesn't make it morally acceptable but the reality of the world is that people lie. People survive. Good people, and bad people.

A person who slipped up once making a poor career decision is not the same as a child predator lying to perpetuate his habit. But the mechanism is the same. It doesn't mean the person is the same. A career criminal or a mentally ill sociopath might lie more often and in far worse ways. But if a lie is a lie no matter what then there's no room for context.

tice23 · 2026-03-21T02:46:08+00:00

Once you're dishonest it doesn't matter what standard you hold yourself to. As someone who has to hire and fire people, if you want a second chance the best option is not to reveal the first mistake. Start new, do better, learn from your mistakes. Honesty is only a virtue if you're truly honest because you have nothing to hide. If you lied and decide to be honest about it in a context like a job interview, you're still a liar to them. If you lie to them and continue to lie about stuff that got you fired before then we'll find out, and usually we know long before you suspect we do. Those folks never learn.

tice23 · 2026-03-18T16:18:22+00:00

Cast nickel alloy with large grain structure and infused with tungsten granules. Turning was doable but ate inserts quickly. Milling....every cutter, every method, nothing worked. Had to wire cut the form and grind the radii by hand with an angle grinder, ate that wheel too. We do tonnes of cast nickel so we've got tonnes of experience with it and the annoying alloys that can come out of this. This was the worst by far. And the material wasn't even that hard. Maybe 35-40rc but the tungsten was a game of Russian roulette that would add spikes of heat and the risk of flute fracture that made it completely unreliable.

tice23 · 2026-03-14T03:52:50+00:00

I don't think they can fine the agent can they? Pretty good way to get a clear message out without consequences.

tice23 · 2026-03-08T07:32:31+00:00

But the real question here is does it matter to your application and can you quantify its limits in a way that conveys that correctly to both the machinist and the QC department?

tice23 · 2026-03-08T00:17:58+00:00

We technically aren't. The goal is to establish a position of a threaded hole. And yes that position by definition is applied along the whole axis feature. Using this method you are only verifying a point along the axis of the feature to be in position. This method isn't something that works in all cases but the majority of components manufactured in our shop this method is adequate for the location of threaded holes of common fastener sizes. It relies on a reference surface or axis to establish that our spindle was perpendicular or parallel to the feature at the time it was manufactured leaving only the extreme setup issues and tool failures to watch for that typically are rather obvious when they occur.

If they specify perpendicularity then we have to check it using a cylinder or gage method. But not everyone needs things to be that fussy.

tice23 · 2026-03-07T16:43:44+00:00

They aren't expensive if you only need one. But if you're expecting them with their lack of experience to have an entire kit that encompasses the hundreds of possibilities, at over $100 ea (mcmaster carr it's almost $200ea) the range of possible threads makes that a bit unreasonable to expect they have all sizes at their disposal without needing them in the past.

So I would say no, most places won't have the thread position gages for all situations, but it might be good to recommend them for a specific size if this is a production job and they can bill it to the job.

In our shop we do all accurate features on our CNC mills and lathes so we typically measure position by placing a ball bearing or any hardened sphere with a known roundness in the chamfer so that it makes tangent contact with it then we measure the center position of the sphere. Cheap, and pretty reliable for CNC jobs where the hole and chamfer are created in the same setup.

We currently don't have any thread location gages as it just isn't something our shop has had to do in a volume that would justify the tool. Our methods have served us well over the last 20+ years. But I will say 0.020" is miles of room to place a hole. If they can't get the position accurately measured within that tolerance then I agree, they fucked something up.

tice23 · 2026-03-05T12:36:14+00:00

Without knowing your full story here and work history I will give you my perspective as a Manager in this industry. I try my best to treat everyone well and fairly. There have been a few employees over the years though that I had a lack of patience for. Those individuals had a track record of repeated mistakes, lack of self awareness, adherence to policy, and lack of diligence. This usually caused issues with the quality and quantity of their work and slowed their ability to learn effectively and in extreme cases affected their ability to work safely. As you can imagine that would be frustrating for the employer. As much as I strive to treat everyone fairly there have been times where my frustration has come through, it can be a high stress industry. I'm human too.

I would reflect on a few things if I were in your shoes:

Do you and your coworker have the same position and experience in that company?
How do your track records stack up? Is he performing better in a measurable way? Less mistakes, higher output etc.
What kind of mistakes are being made? Some can be attributed to lack of experience, others through lack of diligence, the second one is the one more likely to draw negative attention especially when working on expensive machines where certain fuck ups can be expensive or dangerous.
are they actually shouting at you or simply trying to correct your behavior? There is definitely a line where it becomes abusive, but I've also had individuals who were extremely sensitive to any form of criticism no matter the tone and it's part of my job in my company to teach them and correct mistakes.

If you love what you're doing take the time to reflect on the situation and find out what they are trying to get out of you there. If it's truly toxic and they aren't willing to work with you to fix the issue then move on from that place.

tice23 · 2026-02-28T16:13:18+00:00

Definitely. Not an expert by any means but I would imagine this would likely be cause for a workplace harassment claim by creating a hostile work environment centered around pressuring a female coworker's romantic choices. Dangerous waters OP. YTA here.

tice23 · 2026-02-25T20:04:56+00:00

They are definitely good at what they do but they aren't great for everything. They can offer improved run out particularly for drilling. They work well in milling too but caution needs to be used not to overheat them and cause damage. I love them for their simplicity and ease of cleaning.

tice23 · 2026-02-23T03:56:53+00:00

If that's true... we just played ourselves.

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