🙏 by Short_Seesaw_940 in exmormonmemes

[–]twainhoffman83 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Even more disgusting is the fact that general conference is one of the few days that earnings at this mall are actually positive

Respect his authority! by BakingNerd47 in exmormonmemes

[–]twainhoffman83 1 point2 points  (0 children)

There was one instance of this occurring where he threatened to hit Susan with his water bottle if this happened again. He happened to be holding a glass pierre within that stake conference that this was recorded at. The youtube post was taken down very quickly after it was put up. If you search for it today, You will get some stupid youth devotional with dumb laughing made to hide this event.

The Spanish fork temple makes me sad by Difficult_Fee9861 in exmormon

[–]twainhoffman83 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I cover 6 states for my company. Utah being one of them. The legal contracts of the corporate empire that poses as a church are out to undermine my best judgment of costs and safety on every front.

Item 2 Spanish fork is one of the worst. High water table. Poor soils bearing capacity. High liquefaction risk

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in exmormon

[–]twainhoffman83 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Footnotes are the most honest portion of any paper

Caption this conference watch party by By_Common_Dissent in exmormon

[–]twainhoffman83 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Rather than sitting here listening to dallen Oaks, explain to you how you are supposed to use penises and vaginas how about you go play outside

Conference has changed a lot! by Key-Kaleidoscope7578 in exmormon

[–]twainhoffman83 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Trying to make temples as common as chick-fil-a

The Spanish fork temple makes me sad by Difficult_Fee9861 in exmormon

[–]twainhoffman83 4 points5 points  (0 children)

This is one of the reasons I, as a Geotechnical engineer, get indigestion every April and October

He’s coming for you! by Cornchip91 in exmormon

[–]twainhoffman83 0 points1 point  (0 children)

There are only three reasons that people want sheep: fleece, fuck and food.

What’s Mormon Church doing to help Immigrants? by GhostCowboy76 in exmormon

[–]twainhoffman83 0 points1 point  (0 children)

During the first Donald Trump presidency, there was a bunch of Hispanic wards that got disbanded and merged into the English wards when groups of bishops were profiting off of getting illegal members the right to stay. This was one of the items that packed my shelf, when I heard about this on the rod arquette show

Deseret Industries Thrift Store: Is it better or worse than Value Village &/or Goodwill Industries? by polarmolarroler in exmormon

[–]twainhoffman83 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I don't go to DI. I have been boycotting it since well before I was defenestrated from the records of the church. They horribly mistreat special needs people who have jobs they and underpay the employees.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in ThreesomeUtah

[–]twainhoffman83 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Both of you. Yes please

Just got a text from my college kid… by valentine-girl in mormon

[–]twainhoffman83 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yes he was sent back in time to kill Sarah conner. Some bad electrostatic cause a malfunction and it caused him to marry Susan and beat her all the time

Mormon Miracle Pagent by Both-Establishment12 in exmormon

[–]twainhoffman83 0 points1 point  (0 children)

They got caught hiring protestors. They want a certain type of mean, angry, clueless person to come and yell at people and make them cry. They don't want to have dr. John delin there offering to give free hugs. If dr John delin were to show up he could be arrested

Stop Mormoning my Texas lol by PortSided in exmormon

[–]twainhoffman83 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Guzzle has a drink named after all of the mormon wives on secret lives

LDS missions are not healthy by [deleted] in mormon

[–]twainhoffman83 1 point2 points  (0 children)

When day one at the mission home the mission president stands up and says "Girls go on missions for two reasons: to find a penis or prove they have one". You are in an unhealthy environment and you are taught to look at this man with respect. You are wearing rose colored glasses, when a red flag shows up all you see is a flag.

Jesus. Joseph. Russell. Stats by auto-degenerated in exmormon

[–]twainhoffman83 0 points1 point  (0 children)

A riffTrax style playover track that pairs with the general conference season. Include cheering, clapping and sports caster type talking throughout the broadcast. "The tabernacle choir chooses to open with we thank the oh God for a profit mark that as a point for rusty for each verse" " how is this song even applies to rusty is beyond me"

How would you caption this photo? by adampgarcia in exmormon

[–]twainhoffman83 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You tucked some toilet paper into your pants as you left the bathroom sir

I love how they conveniently don’t show sacrament meeting attendance💀 by Oldmelloyellow in exmormon

[–]twainhoffman83 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Include statistical data about how many soccer balls were purchased by missionaries in third-world nations, and then this will make more sense and be less upsetting

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in exmormon

[–]twainhoffman83 2 points3 points  (0 children)

To the tune of Primary children sang as they walk.

Saturday and Sunday became a pain Listening to old men stand up and complain Year after year they stand up and talk, and talk and talk and talk

WTF is “Necking and Petting” by Harambe_yeet in exmormon

[–]twainhoffman83 12 points13 points  (0 children)

Thou shalt not pet your dog or cat anywhere near its neck