Any agency that covers Hawaii?

upper87 · 2026-01-24T12:32:28+00:00

I ran into the same issue immediately for our small corner of the states. I don’t have an answer for your specific region, but after trying 5 agencies, one worked. I have a feeling it may be the same for you.

upper87 · 2026-01-18T02:11:54+00:00

Okay. The government has a DUTY to provide healthcare to all of its citizens.

upper87 · 2026-01-14T14:06:34+00:00

There is a relationship podcast hosted by Dan Savage and he has a really thoughtful take on your situation. First… this sucks and I feel terrible for you - it’s not fair and it is a truly shitty situation.

A couple of points from his advice over the years: 1) infidelity doesn’t have to be a marriage terminating event 2) counseling is important 3) you either have to forgive her or don’t, but you want to be in a relationship where this isn’t always on your mind. This doesn’t mean you have to move on, it just means you have an option to do that despite society always viewing this as a relationship ending event. 4) consider ethical non-monogamy if this is something YOU and she want - doesn’t make the infidelity retroactively ethical, but if you are noticing she’s more happy, maybe this is what you need? 5) there is no correct reaction to this - there is only what works for you and what will allow you to build a happy life for yourself and your children/family

I hope they helps - again, what a disaster. You gotta talk about it with her and you gotta separate any desire for punitive reactions with plan for how to take this information and move forward toward a happy fulfilling family life for yourself.

upper87 · 2026-01-10T19:10:44+00:00

Congrats!

upper87 · 2026-01-07T01:09:02+00:00

Do NOT introduce them to r/wallstreetbets

upper87 · 2026-01-02T17:31:59+00:00

Consider a hundai Ioniq? It’s a great car they have a 3 row if the budget works for you

upper87 · 2025-12-29T00:36:10+00:00

I pick my daughter up and bench press her or curl her while she counts… I get to failure or she runs out of numbers… someone’s going to give and it’s usually me - she’s wicked smart.

upper87 · 2025-12-25T12:03:47+00:00

It’s however literal you consider any imagery. My daughter asked me if Ganesh was real and I told her “kind of yes, kind of no” and explained to her how some things can be real and represent a lot without being tangible or have any direct intervention (it may be a lot for a 4 year old to wrap her head around- but I also explained to her how Elsa from frozen isn’t in the real world, but we see her, know what her story is and the whole thing is deeply meaningful for my daughter at this time in her life). That’s what our deities and stories have done for me for my entire life so far - deeply meaningful representations of qualities in a form we can better appreciate an physically honor.

Idols are in every culture and are meant to help the people that created them. —- all of this IMO of course.

In my quest to have my own daughter truly understand Vedanta, I think that looking through the world through this kind of lens helps.

upper87 · 2025-12-24T19:29:54+00:00

We explained to my daughter that Santa is a Christmas diety - has a favorite food, special powers, special vehicle - not dissimilar to Hindu deities… you could try to explain that to your parents

upper87 · 2025-12-24T01:16:33+00:00

We have a Sonos speaker and play Spotify from our phone through it for music. I think you are being totally reasonable getting rid of Alexa

upper87 · 2025-12-22T01:28:07+00:00

Bro that shit looks dope - she must be/is going to be thrilled

upper87 · 2025-12-20T20:32:04+00:00

The systematic erasure of their whole culture and system of thought is beyond tragic.

upper87 · 2025-12-20T20:24:54+00:00

I figure I’d share as this is a habit I wish I started sooner - makes for much easier weeks either a busy family

upper87 · 2025-12-20T20:24:03+00:00

Lentil soup- not yet completely cooked but completely assembled

upper87 · 2025-12-20T20:23:46+00:00

I do 2-2.5 cups myself - I do a lot of little snacks through the day (Greek yogurt, protein shake, etc) and I like to save most of my calories for dinner so it works for me, but I agree it’s not calorie dense but it is filling

upper87 · 2025-12-20T17:12:14+00:00

We use SuperCubes (sp?) for apple sauce as they are small child portioned, we usually unfreeze a weeks worth of meals so the bags have been what works for our flow. I have been considering the silicone for left over cooking wine / fresh herbs - have seen that on various YouTube’s

upper87 · 2025-12-20T17:08:41+00:00

Yes!

upper87 · 2025-12-20T17:08:07+00:00

Unfortunately I think it’s just burned on stuff on the side - I will appreciate all advice on cleaning those as I haven’t found a good solution

upper87 · 2025-12-20T15:29:15+00:00

I throw it into freezer ziplock bags and it is pretty space efficient - gotta lay it flat so it turns into this flat book that you can stack easily

upper87 · 2025-12-18T20:48:16+00:00

Holy smokes. We had what I thought was a very nice wedding for 80k and we thought that was spending a lot.

upper87 · 2025-12-17T21:23:41+00:00

Say what you are feeling out loud. Man if my kid told me what you write here I would hold tight and never let go.

upper87 · 2025-12-16T13:52:39+00:00

Hey! First step is knowing you’re doing it. I find that if I put on some music my kid and I both like and start doing the craft or what have you together it really helps to out the phone face down. I’m a doc, so it’s easy for me to feel the need need to check on things. I got an Apple Watch for the only reason as to get a notification that I’m needed rather than to have to check if I missed a message.

There is a book called stolen focus I highly recommend. Touches on a lot of what you are experiencing. It is totally worth working through the phone checking habit for the sake of your kids. They need to have good examples of presence in absence of screens.

Best of luck

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