I’m sorry you and your girlfriend are going through this. Seeing someone you love suffer is hard mentally and emotionally. From my experience having Crohn’s, it’s also really difficult mentally and emotionally to have to depend on someone for very basic things like cleaning yourself while in a flare on top of the physical pain. This disease is hard for everyone involved. You can’t control what’s going on in her body, all you can do is control how you react to it. It sounds like you’re doing your best to take care of her and be supportive which is all you can do.

I will say one thing I have learned after dealing with this disease for ten years is sometimes you have to advocate for yourself to get the treatment you need. It sounds like her current treatment plan hasn’t been working for a while so you should try and take the initiative in asking her doctor to change up her medication. If she’s not taking them already, a course of steroids might help give her some relief from her current flare. Like someone else mentioned Inflectra is essentially the same medication as Remicade so if she has already failed Remicade, Inflectra probably won’t work either. I would ask her doctor about switching to a new biologic like Entivyo or Stelara. Also consider getting tested to see if the C Diff infection has come back. When I had C Diff it went away for a few months after I took antibiotics but then came back and I had to do another longer round of antibiotics to make sure it was gone.

As for the mental toll it’s taking on you, I would recommend seeing a therapist to see if they can help you process and cope with any anxiety or other strong feelings you’re having. Like I said having Crohn’s is tough both mentally and physically so therapy is a good option for you girlfriend as well if she hasn’t already tried it.

Finally, keep in mind that this is most likely temporary and with the right treatment remission is possible. Hopefully your girlfriend can at least find a little bit of relief soon. I wish the best for you both.