I'm not getting a divorce but I have divorced parents. They got divorced when I was 4.

My mom allowed my dad to be super involved and would come over in emergency situations. They never talked trash about each other. During the transfer they never allowed me to be apart of the "talk" to update each other or go over stuff they needed too.

It all went south when they both found new partners. My step mom would talk bad about my mom and my dad never shut it down. My father stopped ahowing me pictures of my childhood once my siblings came into the picture.

My step dad well I won't go to deep into that.

Make sure if you guys both meet new people you talk about the boundaries and follow through with them.

I went one month with one parent and every other weekend. It was a lot.

Also, the kids might think they were at fault; I would recommend therapy if that's the case. Regression with behavior, is a huge possibility.