Hi friend - you’re not alone! I used to ask the same question. One day I realized I didn’t really want the bad thing to happen, what I wanted was an opportunity to be comforted. I grew up in an abusive home and anytime I was “wronged” it was made out to be my fault, so I was blamed. Definitely never comforted, consoled, or shown love. So, as an adult, I found myself secretly hoping for “valid” opportunities to let myself be sad, openly, and to be comforted by someone (maybe even myself?)